Trapped
by The living entity of laziness
Summary: ever wonder why jigsaw always lets you go after you win a game? because you've played by his rules, so waht happens when Jigsaw becomes a SAW loser. bad joke, i know
1. Chapter 1

Trapped

Disclaimer: I don't own saw, in fact it bloody well terrifies me!

I wake up, and all I can taste is blood. My arms and legs are bound to a hard metal chair, and my head feels heavy.

Oh shit.

I have just taken note of the large metal object on my face. A reverse bear trap. I can't believe it, Jigsaw doesn't exist, there's no such thing as 'the Jigsaw killer' it's just a movie!

At least, I think it is….

'Hello Jade, I'd like to play a game'

I turn my head, and see a monitor flicker into life. On screen is a puppet with a white face and red circles on the cheeks. It's scary; I look away and listen to the voice.

'You know what this trap does so I won't bother explaining it. Every day you send people away for the rest of their lives for breaking the law. And yet you have been seen, going into alleys and buying illegal drugs. Well, now we'll see what's more important to you, your life or your lie. You are as much a criminal as I am. Lets see how long it takes you to accept that. Let the games begin.'

No

_No, no, no._

I feel my stomach churn and my head spin.

I have to kill someone.

I look through my eye slit to see who will be the one to suffer, but to my shock, I see no one. I blink, and rub my eyes to make sure that I'm not delirious.

Nope. No one.

Why would he put me in the reverse bear trap with no key? Jigsaw is a lot of awful things but he would always give you a way to escape. So where is the person I'm meant to cut open? Not that I'm looking forward to it, but I really want to get the terrible part out of the way. _Where is it?_ In all of the movies with this trap, someone always has the key in their-

Oh no.

I rip off the rope that is binding my right hand to the chair and feel in my lap. It's there. Without having to think about it I throw the small knife across the dark room. I'd rather die quickly by reverse bear trap that stab myself to death. If I have to die, I'd rather not lose my guts.

As if it heard me, my stomach suddenly heaves, and I throw up all over the floor.

'Oh great' I say out loud 'now I'm covered in puke, _and _I'm going to die'

Suddenly, something catches my eye. A small silver glint in the pool of bright red vomit. The key. It's close enough to get with my hand without breaking the string. I quickly check the timer: one minute left, no time to be careful. I stand up so fast I hear my knees click, I hear the timer speed up. Counting down my last seconds. I grab the key and unlock the trap, then throw it across the room into a dark corner. 3 seconds later I hear it's large metal jaws snap open. I'm safe. I can go home and know that I'll live a long, happy life. One things for sure though, I'm giving up crack. I was put here for a reason, I should be grateful to be alive.

I wait for the door to open.

I wait.

And wait.

Waiting.

I go over to the door and knock.

No answer.

'Hello?' I call.

No answer.

Suddenly the monitor flickers into life, and the puppet reappears. Ever wonder what a pissed off puppet looks like?

'_YOU!' _it screeches at me 'Are a CHEAT! You think I'm gonna let you go just because you think you're smarter than I am? Get ready, _miss whatever you name is, _you are in for a world of pain'

The screen goes blank. I stand there, stunned, and then it hits me.

_I'm not getting out._

I start hammering at the door, screeching.

'LET ME OUT! YOU BASTARD, YOU FUCKING BASTARD! LET ME OUT NOW! I WON, TAKE IT LIKE A MAN YOU FUCKING CUNT!'

A dart fires from a whole just underneath the monitor and hits me in the neck, then everything goes blank.


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I don't own Saw.

I wake up to shouting. No, not shouting, _screaming._ I strain my ears and listen.

'NO! You TERDJigsaw! She outsmarted you, deal with it!'

The voice is feminine so I guess it's a woman. It's almost squeaking she's yelling so hard, But strangely it doesn't scare me. The next voice, however, is so terrifyingly familiar I feel my stomach churn again.

'She cheated Amanda' Jigsaw says calmly ' we're going to keep trying her until she learns to play fair. Now help me carry her out'

I feel his cold hands on my legs and I literally have to bite my tongue to keep from screeching. I wait for the second set of hands, and to be lifted up. I wish I hadn't thrown that knife away, I could use it. I can't believe he's going to put me in another trap. Ever so slowly I feel my left bra cup, it's still there. The lighter I use to smoke my splifs. That'll get me out of most of the traps, hopefully.

The second set of hands land on my face, they're surprisingly soft, like they're made out of silk, Amanda slowly strokes my forehead, tracing my bone structure and outlining my eyes. When she speaks next her voice is high.

'Jigsaw, I've seen this girl around town. She doesn't have any friends, she doesn't live with anyone, and her family doesn't even _talk_ to her anymore. Can you blame her for wanting a little excitement?'

It's like she's known me all of my life.

But Jigsaw's grip only tightens, and when he next speaks his voice sounds a lot like his puppet.

' _She cheated.'_

'She won'

'She dented the door'

'You didn't play fair'

The hands on my legs suddenly disappear, and his voice is livid.

'SHE DIDN'TPLAY FAIR!'

The hands on my face disappear too, and I hear the light tap of stiletto heels walking away.

'Well, if that's the case, you two will have a lot to talk about' she says, I hear the large metal door open, then close.

Amanda's gone.

And left me alone with a psychotic killer.

Who has a ventriloquist's doll.

Shit

Fuck

Bollox.

Jigsaw's reaction is more direct, 3 seconds after Amanda leaves I hear him hammering at the large metal door.

'AMANDA! YOU BITCH AMANDA!

I hear him walk over to the wall and flick the light switch, and the room is flooded with light, I see Jigsaw for the first time.

He looks just like in the movie.

We're still in the room with the bear trap, jigsaw goes and sits in the chair that I'd been bound to. He fingers the knife that I'd thrown away in his hand, I slip the lighter out if my bra and into my pocket. If he's going to fight, so am I.

'put it away Blondie' he say's slowly, and he snaps the knife like a twig and throws the pieces across the room. Taking the hint I take my lighter out of my pocket and crush it under my boot. Jigsaw smiles

'So. You cheated'

'Didn't' I say childishly 'you just can't accept that I won'

Jigsaw's smile becomes more forced

'You didn't play by the rules'

'The rule's are to get the key out' I say a little frightened now '_how_ you get it out doesn't matter'

Jigsaw stands up, teeth bared. Just as he's about to speak the monitor suddenly flickers into life, and Amanda (looking just like she does in the movie) appears.

'Hello Jigsaw. Hello Jade' she says smoothly 'I'd like to play a game'

someone next to Amanda splutter's with laughter

'come on babe! Let me have a turn!'

'Oh fine' she sighs, getting up. Hoffman replaces her.

'Now' he says in this weird little kiddie voice ' you two have been very naughty, very very naughty, so until you sort out your differences, no playtime'

The screen goes blank, not because it's been switched off, because Jigsaw as just kicked it in. he sits back on the chair, for some sick twisted reason he's smiling. We sit in an uneasy silence.

I feel my stomach rumble, and remember I still have a question for Jigsaw.

'How long have I been here?' I whisper

'Six days' he laughs ' you slept like a brick.'

'A brick?'

' Yes. Big red heavy thing? Used for houses? How dumb are you?'

'You know everything about me, you tell me'

' I know only the stuff that's important to what I do. You're not that special'

'Shut up'

I sit up and slip my boots off, my feet are filthy. So this is what a tramp feels like. Suddenly my stomach contracts, not one of those faint little aches, but one of those things where you feel like you stomach has been sucked up by a black hole.

'They'll bring us food' he sighs; stretching out on the chair 'they have to or trapping us would be pointless' I don't care. All I want to do is get out of here, and burn my Saw DVDs. I want to go home, I want to wake up, and have this all be a nightmare.

I feel tears stream down my face, I don't wipe them away, Jigsaw doesn't of his victims cry but he doesn't let them go.

'What's wrong with you?' he asks. He isn't taunting, he sounds worried. I shake my head and sigh,

' What do you care? Tons of your victims cry but you don't even turn a hair'

' That's 'cos _I'm _never the one in the trap, I don't sympathise when I've never experienced it. Now that I'm the one in the trap I care. Besides, I could use a bedtime story'

I groan ' I'm not good at telling people my problems, would you settle for a life story?'

He laughs ' I'll endure it'


	3. chapter tres

Disclaimer: still don't own saw

'I was born on the street, in 1990' I'm playing with a strand of hair, avoiding Jigsaw's gaze 'my mother died during childbirth, I only just survived. I was raised by a man by the name of Joey Rosalini, he was a con man and never spent two nights in the same place. He taught me the tricks of the trade, and how to go weeks without food, but he never told me why my mother was living on the street, or who my father was. He named me Jade because he thought Jewel names sounded distinguished, and that it might help me get more cash if I had a mysterious name.'

'Needless to say his whole life was based on money, but he did care for me a lot. I was very shy when I was young, and it took me a while to get the knack of hustling. Of course, when needed he stepped in and would often manage to get the cash I couldn't. we were very well off by the time I was ten, and we could afford a new home. Obviously, we couldn't go up to the estate agents wearing ripped jeans and T-shirts so filthy they could stand up by themselves, and we needed the legal documents. We had $500,000,000 from all of our hustling, after paying for counterfeit birth certificates and buying a suit and dress we only had $350,000,000 left, but it was still enough for a decent house.'

I sigh and rub my eyes, I haven't thought about what happens next for 9 years.

'we entered the estate agents looking as normal as you could get, the man we were assigned to was named Jack Duel. The name rang a bell but I couldn't place it, I simply decided it was one of the names of my old stolen stuffed animals. Until we entered the office. We knew the man behind the desk well, too well. We had robbed this man countless times, he knew our faces, he knew our names, and he knew where we'd gotten the money that Joey had so stupidly flashed in his face. 5 minutes, just 5 minutes and we were being stuffed into separate police cars, and speeding away from each other. That was the last time I saw Joey Rosalini. The cop in the back kept trying to hug me, but after I bit her she was set straight. Never trust a cop, all they do is make you miserable. we were practically providing a service, teaching people not to trust shoddy looking people, why the fuck did they have to get involved?'

I suddenly realise where I am, Jigsaw is hugging me tightly while my angry words become sobs. I clear my throat and pull away, this is too weird.

'why are you being so nice to me?' I need answers. Jigsaw sighs, and puts his hands on either side of my face.

'in my life, I've had a lot of women-'

'in the movie you-'

'screw the movie, I've been intimate with a lot of women, and they've all loved me and wanted kids with me. But I've never wanted one with any of them, but you-'

I stand up so fast I pull several muscles in my legs, and scream into Jigsaw's surprised face

'is that all you want?!? SEX!?'

I storm over to the door and hammer hard, I won't sit here and listen to some old coot droning about how he wants to SHAG ME!

'you don't listen much do you?' sighs Jigsaw, he's poking the now very mouldy pile of puke with his shoe, smiling.

'I've heard enough.' I say stubbornly, I want to get out of here, now.

'sit down' he's still smiling

I sit, my back against the door, as far from Jigsaw as possible.

'I never wanted kids, until I met you. You're so small, so timid, so easily scared. You have so many stories but you won't tell me, I just wonder if this is what a dad feels like.'

'dad's don't tend to threaten their children with reverse bear traps.' I say, but he knows that I'm kidding. I crawl over to Jigsaw and curl up next to him, I check his watch, 11pm. I feel my eyes drop, and I sleep safely in the know that I won't die today.

**2 more coming!**


	4. Chapter 4

Trapped chapter4

Disclaimer: still don't own it.

I wake up in a weird position. My knees are bent like I'm praying but my back is horizontal, I feel a huge pain in my back, and its getting worse.

Shit

Oh shit

This is the shittiest thing ever.

I'm trapped, tricked, going to die, and so fucking pissed of I may rip the rope that is binding my hands together and hang jigsaw with it. Sadly I can't do this right now so I settle for an alternative.

'JIGSAW!!!!!' I screech, trying to squirm, away. The pain shoots through me like a bullet and I feel bone scratch on metal. WHAT'S GOING ON?

'Don't try, it'll get worse' I hear a familiar voice say. I look across the huge concrete room to see Jigsaw, in the exact same position as me. It is then that I see what I am trapped in. two huge metal panels, coated in spikes are sinking into jigsaw's and my back, in front of each of us is a bucket, the bright red vomit glistening like a jelly inside. Right at the bottom is a button, vomit stuck to it like glue.

'What's going on?' I sob, wriggling around.

'It's a trap you dick' he says 'I designed it'

'I know! But I don't know how to get out of this one!'

'I know, it was too gross to watch so we terminated it'

A small tape recorder lowers from somewhere I can't see, coming from it is the sound if violent arguing. One voice is Amanda's, the other's Hoffman. Then there is a loud slap, a sob, and then Hoffman starts.

'Now, you, little Jade. Have been staying with us for a while now, and we have had the courtesy to keep you alive, and how do you repay us? You puke on our lovely floor. Tut. So here's your chance to repay us; simple entertainment. The rules are simple, stick your head in the puke, and press the button. That will turn off the other person's panel, stopping it from turning them into a human shishcobab. The only catch? They have to do the same, and seeing as how you only have 5 minutes to do it, it will prove just how sacrificial you two are.'

Then it explodes in a ball of fire.

Shit

Shit

Shit

Shit

Shit

Shit

Shit.

I have finally done it, I have buried myself in such deep bull-crap I am lost forever. I curl up as best as I can in this position, I am a disgrace. I tried, I really did try to stay quiet. I hoped if I did I wouldn't have to do this kind of crap anymore. I'm useless, I let everyone down. Jigsaw, Joey, my family, even myself.

'oh mother of fuck! Get up now you stupid bimbo!' jigsaw suddenly yells. I look up to see his face halfway down the bucket, he's seriously digging! The god knows how old puke coats his face, hair, and is even in his mouth.

'what are you doing?!?' I yell, the spikes are digging into him. Blood drips onto the ground, he looks up, his face filled with anger, and pants.

'they, are, NOT, going, to, win! Get, digging!'

without thought I plunge my head into the bucket and feel the vomit swallow me up, I open one eye and see that despite what I saw, the button is sliding around, witch will make it difficult to press. I have to go slowly. I shut my eye, and slip my body out best as I can, and ease my head deeper into the bucket, the vomit gets everywhere, hair, nose, mouth. It feels like a lifetime, but all the while all I'm thinking is how its MY fault.

It IS my fault

I smoked the crack

I refused to play fair

I got jigsaw into this

It's MY fault we both might die.

My nose touches the button, with one last push I hear a loud click, and a shout. Wrenching my head out I look up to see jigsaw squirming out from under the panel. His back is bleeding, and so is everything else and his head is coated in vomit, but he's SAFE. This is the noblest I've ever felt.

Until I realise my OWN spikes.

The pain is unbelievable, I already know I'll never walk again even if I DO survive this.

'JIGSAW!!!' I scream

'don't worry kid, I'll get you out of there and patch you up myself' and with that, he picks up his bucket, plunges his hand in and presses the button.

3 large clicks, the panel lifts up, and I feel a huge relief wash over me. I look up at Jigsaw, tears in my eyes, but he isn't smiling. His face is a mix of fear and fury.

'Jigsaw?'

'MOVE!' he suddenly screams

but its too late.

3 more clicks

and the spikes come down with an almighty force.

The last thing I see in my life, is Jigsaw's anguished face.

I'm dead.

I know I am.

**One more chapter!**


	5. Chapter 5

Trapped chapter 5(I think)

Disclaimer: I still don't own it, but do you think I should?

I wake up to see Hoffman sitting in the corner, strapped into a hard metal chair. Jigsaw is standing behind him, I hear him talking in a sort of goo language.

'You've been a very bad boy haven't you Hoffman?' he gabbles

'Piss off' he grumbles.

'What was that little boy? Do you want to be sent back to bed?'

I look across the room to see a large double bed filled with shards of glass, and blood.

'Go ahead, you don't have the guts Jigsaw, you've gone soft.' He says. He sounds confident, but I can't ignore the hint of fear in his voice. Jigsaw calmly un-straps Hoffman and drags him over to the bed. Hoffman in wearing a pair of thick leather shorts and a mask. Trust Jigsaw to make it seem like a bad porno movie. I shut my eyes and try not to hear.

I HAVE to be dead. No-one could have survived that kind of bodily harm, I'm dead. I woke up yesterday and haven't moved or spoken since. I can't. See, that's how I know I'm dead, I'm bound in the same position, it hurts to open my mouth and I feel so EMPTY.

Its punishment. No-one knows I'm awake yet, I don't want a bunch of pricks telling me 'I'm a great little fighter'.

'OH GOD!' Hoffman shrieks, I open my eyes to see him lying on the bed, covered in glass, jigsaw dancing on top of him. Tears prick in my eyes and I can't help a small sob escaping. Jigsaw stops dancing and runs over to me, leaving Hoffman lying there, limp and soiled. He grabs me by the wrist and shakes me, pain rockets through my arm and I start crying for real.

'Sorry! Sorry!' he says, panicking. 'Amanda! Get in here!'

Amanda runs in, her spiky hair drenched. She is wearing only a towel. Hoffman wolf whistles.

'Shut up penis breath. Is she ok?' she sounds worried.

'She's awake' says Jigsaw 'bring me the morphine'

'W-wh-w' I stammer, but the pain is so overwhelming I stop, jigsaw understands though.

'Hoffman rigged the trap. You almost died but we managed to save you with some fishing line, and a LOT of Hoffman's blood. You have the same blood type.'

Wow.

Wow.

Does this mean I'm not dead?

Yep.

Wow.

That's all I can't think.

WOW.

'Your lungs are punctured, your arms are shattered, and I don't know if you'll walk again' says Amanda, pissing on my parade.

'But if you can move anything, there's a chance. Can you move?'

I blink, and try to move random parts of me. Arms? No. Toes? No. Head? No. I keep trying and trying but nothing moves, I see Jigsaw bury his head in his hands and Amanda's face crumple. I can't let them down after they've tried so hard to keep me alive.

Come on.

Come ON

WORK!

Suddenly, a huge rush of energy pushes my foot out of the covers, my leg is in agony, it hurts so much, but It WORKS, my leg works.

I wiggle it around, smiling. Jigsaw smiles too.

'Oh great, were going to have to keep her now aren't we?' scowls Hoffman. 'Trap builder to babysitter in one day'

Usually, I would defend my pride by claiming that I was just short, but Hoffman is standing up now, and is standing right above me. He has a look in his eyes that says 'I hate you'.

I whimper and sink back into a crouched position.

I'm scared.

'So, if the little Rugrat is going to live with us, what do we do with it? It certainly doesn't look sexy, but maybe it could attract potential paedophiles?'

Jigsaw and Amanda stare at him like he's just announced that she'd shit himself. With horror and disgust.

'Hoffman' sighs Jigsaw, his eyes bloodthirsty '_**JADE **_will not take part in ANY paedophile attracting thank you very much. She's way too old.' He said it like that was that. Suddenly I felt a sting in my arm and knew that it was the morphine, a drug that always makes me sleepy. As I was drifting off I heard Hoffman say one thing. One, terrible thing that I NEVER thought anyone would know about me.

'she's only 14'

No.

No

No.


	6. Chapter 6

Trapped chapter 6

Disclaimer: I know, I don't own it. :(

Slowly, Amanda, Jigsaw and Hoffman come into focus. Each of them looks eager for me to tell them what's going on. Except Hoffman who for some reason knows. They have hooked me up to this computer that works by eye movement. Obviously, none of them knows that I'm alliterate and don't know that I can't read what I'm saying, but I can hear the creepy robot voice so I can change mistakes. Slowly, I begin my story.

'The story about my child hood is true. It just happened a little earlier than I made out. We were ripped apart when I was 5. I was in care for 2 years, I had on and off foster families, but I never stayed with them long once they heard about Joey. The care home never welcomed me, they would stare at me like I was diseased, and they locked my bedroom door every night in case I stole something. When I was seven I ran away. I found the place me and Joey used to live and stayed there for a while, we'd made quite a few friends while on the street and they took care of me. But when I turned 14 they told me I needed to leave. I asked why but they never told me. I didn't know what to do. They had stopped looking for me, but I still didn't know what to do. I was sitting on the curb crying when a cop came. She was quite small and looked like me, only her hair was blond. She was sweet. I'm not proud of what I did but I did it to survive. I killed her. I took her uniform, her badge, her gun, everything. I checked her wallet. 25. I was only 14 and looked young for my age, but I managed to pull it off. I went to her house, and went in. it was empty. One bedroom with a single bed, limited food in the fridge, clearly she lived alone. I dyed my hair and went into work the next day. I played ignorance when they said I looked different, they found the woman's body but it was too badly mangled. I'd stolen the teeth and burnt them so she couldn't be identified by dental records. I've managed to live with it for almost a year. But in the last few months, it has started to get to me, and I started on the splifs.'

The robot voice is starting to die, my eyes are too tired to say much more, so I ask one more question.

'How did you know Hoffman?'

He grins and licks his lips

'I'm not dumb; before we got you I checked your file down at the station. The woman you're posing as had blue eyes, yours are green. I checked your house for contact lenses and didn't find any. Then I found your photos, and remembered'

He smiles and says, in a terribly haunting voice

'You-you two! You robbed me BLIND!'

Oh my god.

Jack Duel.

'I was looking round town for some new well…let's say players. You two robbed me of my entire trap fund.'

I look round the room. Amanda and Jigsaw are staring at me. We all sit in silence for a while.

'Right.' Says Jigsaw eventually 'lets get you on the move kid.'

What?

He sees my look of confusion.

'We need to get you walking, the more time you spend on your feet the more likely you'll walk properly.'

He puts both hands under my arms and hauls me up. He wraps my right arm around his shoulder and my left ends up on Hoffman's, who has changed into blue jeans and a white shirt. Most of my body slumps like a rag doll, but my one working leg stay firmly on the ground. It is only now that I realise how small I really am. How ever did I pass for 25?

'Oh god.' Sighs Amanda 'Your legs are all twisted up. We'll need to straighten them out.'

The pain is excruciating.

Tears stream down my face and I sob hard in spite of my hurting throat. I want to weep into Jigsaw's shoulder but I have no control over my neck, I try to move it but it hurts too much. My head ends up on Hoffman's shoulder, I hear him snort with laughter.

Jigsaw gently moves my head to his shoulder; I feel my legs being wrapped in bandages and a needle in my arm. As the drowsiness begins to take over, I feel something odd. A longing. I look over to Hoffman and it gets stronger. He snarls at me and leaves the room. Maybe it's the Morphine doing this, but I feel like something's missing now that he's gone.


	7. Chapter 7

Trapped chapter 7!

Disclaimer: I, Don't, Own, It!

**Hey! Just wanna say thanks to everyone whose been reading trapped!**

I can't sleep. My legs and arms are in plaster, I have a neck brace and the morphine is wearing off. I can't call Amanda for more, I'll go to sleep and I'll start dreaming again. I can't handle any more dreams.

Hoffman haunts my dreams, stirring up images. The time in his office when he was posing as Jack Duel, the time earlier when I cried into his shoulder, his voice coming out of the tape recorder. There are new images too. Hoffman hugging me. Me sobbing into Hoffman's shoulder, Hoffman kissing me…..

What's wrong with me? Why am I fantasising about the man that tried to have me killed? He patronised us, rigged a trap in an attempt to mangle me, so why am I thinking about kissing him? He's not sorry about things, he wants me dead! He's way older than me, I don't fantasise about Jigsaw kissing me so why am I about Hoffman?

'Stupid kid'

My eyes flicker to the corner to see Hoffman's dark outline, he moves towards me, I lay perfectly still, trying to figure out why part of me is exited. He reaches the space by my head and clamps his hand over my mouth. The exited feeling explodes into joy at his touch, even though he's gripping me so tight I can feel the bruises forming.

'Now, you listen to me' he whispers in my ear 'you will not last long here unless you stop acting like such a little wuss. So, here's what were going to do. I am going to come here, every night, and you will do what I say. I don't care what religion you are or if you think it's wrong, you will do it and like it. That ought to toughen you up.' Then he removes his hand and leaves the room.

The exited feeling is gone.

I'm scared.

I know what he's going to do.

Tears stream from my eyes as I drift into dreamless sleep.

I wake up still crying. I have a splitting headache, and my whole body is in agony. Amanda comes in holding a syringe.

'painkillers' she smiles, sticking the needle in my arm 'can't have you dozing off all the time'

The pain sooths and Amanda carefully unbandages my legs. It's healing already.

'looks like they weren't badly broken at all, you should be walking in a week or so'

I don't react. Carefully, Amanda lifts me from the bed into a wheelchair waiting outside the door and wheels me into a modern looking kitchen. I look around, only now realising that I don't know where I am. Jigsaw is sitting at the polished wooden table, a cup of coffee in his hand. He laughs at my expression.

'we're undercover right now. We're still in Manhattan but just a couple of streets away from the warehouse. I'm posing as Arthur Jackson, Amanda is my wife, Alicia Jackson and Hoffman is my teenage son Bob. I've already made up a fake name for you, Alex Jackson. Do you mind acting like a nine year old? You look pretty young.'

I sit there, taking it all in. I look round to see Hoffman standing there in a navy blue school uniform, it's probably supposed to look smart but he's customised it radically. Gelled hair, untucked shirt and his blazer over one shoulder.

'Not bad for 25 huh?' he laughs running a hand through his gelled up hair.

Huh? Did he forget last night? Did I dream it? Was it all just a nightmare?

Will I lose my virginity to a serial killer?

'Well' Sighs Jigsaw 'Best get to work. I'm a life insurance salesman. Ironic huh? Come on 'son' I'll give you a lift.'

Hoffman drains a glass of orange juice and swings his backpack on. He kisses Amanda on the cheek.

'Bye MOM' he laughs. Amanda tuts.

'Calm down kid were not outside yet'

Hoffman jogs over to me and ruffles my hair.

'Bye bye BABY'

I pout.

He's acting like a big brother, not the creep who threatened me with rape last night. I think I was probably dreaming. I look up onto his friendly face, I cant imagine him hurting me.


	8. Chapter 8

Trapped chapter 8  
disclaimer: I know, I DON'T OWN SAW!!

I lay awake, not daring to shut my eyes in case Hoffman is waiting in the corner again. I don't want him to hurt me. I just want to sleep. I remember the exited feeling I got when he clamped his hand over my mouth, what was that? Why do I miss the feel of his skin on mine, why do I long to hear the rhythm of his pulse again, why do I wish I could smell his fresh, clean smell as he whispered threats into my ear?

He thinks I'm weak. He thinks he can just, crush me under his foot like a bug. Anger boils up inside me, beads of sweat appear on my forehead and I feel my whole body get hotter. Of its own accord, one of my legs, the one that still works, slips out of the covers. I wait for the pain to come, but it doesn't. My other leg slips out too, rotating my top half so I'm sitting up. My arms are in bandages so they can't do much, but my legs are stronger than ever, and soon I'm standing for the first time in ages. My spine still aches and I'm quite badly unbalanced, but I'm **STANDING**. Slowly, I take a step forward. Then another, then another, and soon I'm walking round and round the bedroom. It's now that I get a proper look round it. Jigsaw sure was serious about me posing as a 9 year old, even in the dark everything is bright pink. The bed, the curtains, the walls, there's even a bright pink teddy against the wall. I want to look in the wardrobe but my arms are kind of busy, and any attempt to use my teeth or nose would mean bending over. An experience I don't want to have just yet.

There's a mirror in the corner, I shuffle over to it and see my reflection for the first time in god knows how long.

And a loud screech echo's all around the room, I sink to the ground, I want to cover my hideous face but I cant, tears stream from my screwed up eyes, my mouth screeches, and my face, my horrible, disfigured, ghastly face, stares back at me in the mirror. I'm not JADE anymore, I'm a monster, ripped apart and scared, shunned and hated by everyone. 2 long, deep pink scars run down my face, each starting at my forehead. My lips are so swollen and pussy they don't resemble anything anymore, my hair it cut short like small boy's and my nose, is just a big round ball.

The door bursts open, Hoffman, Amanda and Jigsaw all burst in. Jigsaw tries to pick me up, but I kick my freshly working legs until he sets me down on my feet. I stumble disoriented to the wardrobe and bang my head against the door.

'well she's walking' sighs Hoffman 'and she's talking, even if it's just screams.'

I whirl around, as best as I can, and walk over to Hoffman, I whisper into his ear

'be thankful I'm not killing you right now you fucking liar'

'Jade, the scars will fade' pleads Amanda

'and you're legs and spine have healed faster than we could have hoped, it looks worse than it is'

I straighten up, and turn to Amanda and Jigsaw. I speak to them properly, for the first time with my new, weaker voice.

'sorry. It was a shock. If you don't mind, I'd like to talk to Hoffman in private. It could take a while'

Jigsaw nods 'yeah, you deserve some answers from him kid' he kisses me on the cheek and leaves the room. Amanda hugs me and follows. I Turn to Hoffman.

'sit down' I say calmly.

'make me' he laughs. With new balance, I raise one leg and kick him straight into the stomach. He falls backwards and lands with a thump on the bed. I hear Jigsaw cheering in the other room.

'ok.' Says Hoffman hotly 'what do you want?'

'you lied to me' I say darkly 'you told me you would do things to me, and when I was scared, and worried, you didn't do anything you lied. Why?'

Hoffman laughs. And says breezily

'I didn't lie.'

'what?'

'look, did I tell you I'd toughen you up?'

'…yes'

'and now look, a day later, you're walking and talking.'

'….'

'and because I scared you, did that motivate you to hurry you up?'

'….well…'

'so I did what I promised'

Hoffman stands up, and pats me on the cheek, then he walks over to the door. He opens the door and says calmly

' and by the way, I think shorter hair makes you look prettier'

then he leaves.

What just happened?

"I think shorter hair makes you-"

_prettier?_

He could have said pretty, he could have said good, but he said PRETTIER.

What does that mean?


	9. Chapter 9

Trapped chapter 9

Disclaimer: yeah, I don't own it but I REALLY want to.

Pushing hard with my legs I heave myself out of bed, my now slightly longer hair is as messy as usual, later Amanda will attempt to put it up and, as usual, I'll refuse bitterly. I sit down at the small pink desk and look in the mirror. A week ago, my lips were swollen, my face was covered in horrible deep scars and my hair was just short blondy-red stubble. Now, my lips are smaller, a little scabby but they're finally starting to resemble lips again. The scars are fading a little now, they're still horribly visible, but according to Amanda they should be gone in a few more weeks. The hair has changed the most though. when I was posing as the cop I dyed my hair bright blond, because that's what colour her hair was, now that I haven't dyed it, it's growing back black again. Its weird, It's been a year since my hair was that colour.

'Hey sleepyhead' I hear Hoffman say, I look over to the doorway to see him standing there in his usual blue school uniform, a bagel in his hands, he opens it up and licks the jam out of it.

Lucky bagel.

I stand up, embarrassed to be seen in the small black night-gown that Amanda got me, I walk over to the wardrobe and open it. My hands work fine now, but my arms are still hurting and Jigsaw didn't want to take chances. It's full of the usual clothes I would wear, (turns out Jigsaw WAS kidding about the nine year old thing, he's just got no idea what a 14 year old girl likes). I skill fully unhook a short black skirt, and a red camisole. Putting them back on the bed I turn round to see Hoffman still standing at the doorway, munching the bagel. I look at him expectantly.

'Sorry' he says, and breaks off a piece for me, misunderstanding.

'Privacy' I sigh, trying to wriggle out of the extremely fidgety sling. Suddenly I feel hands on my hips, wrapping themselves around me, Hoffman's head rests on my shoulder, his hands still working their way around my body.

My heart is racing, this is what was missing, this is what I want, Hoffman…now….

Suddenly my nightdress is pulled over my head, leaving me standing there stark naked.

Bewildered, I look over to see Hoffman folding up the nightdress and placing it in a drawer. Somehow he managed to get it over my sling without me noticing. He grins.

'Jigsaw and Amanda are out, I'm babysitting. Now, where do you keep your undies?'

I blush crimson, and begin to stammer.

't-top left drawer, um…so-ho-how's school oh yeah it's the we-weekend so why are-'

He puts a finger to my lips and laughs.

'schools fine, thought the lessons are pretty repetitive. I've been thinking about using dissection for a saw trap, perhaps for a vet that's not doing what they're supposed to? Anyway, I'm in uniform cos Amanda forgot to go laundry, Jigsaw says it's not man's work and the only other girl we have is too little to work the machine.'

I pout expertly and cringe as Hoffman dresses me. He insists that he must put everything on -yes, EVERYTHING everything- in case I put strain on my back bending over.

When I'm dressed he takes me into the bathroom and helps me wash up, he sits on the edge of the bathtub as I brush my teeth, looking at all the weird shampoos and conditioners, sniffing and squeezing them out.

'you know, for your hair type I'd recommend _Dove_.' He laughs, and walks over to the cabinet and pulls out a tube of cream. He takes the toothbrush from my mouth and begins to rub it on my scars. Amanda does this every morning to help the scars. Hm. Hoffman is rubbing white stuff on me… interesting.

When he's done I look at the bathroom clock, then remember I can't tell time.

'11.30' he says helpfully. 'Bedtime already'

'WHAT?!? I just got up!' I whine childishly

'yeah, I was supposed to get you up earlier but you started talking in your sleep and kind freaked me out. Plus, Jigsaw said he wanted you in bed by the time he got home so…'

I pout sulkily and stalk back to my room, I change as fast as possible back into my nightdress and back into bed. I don't intend to sleep, I intend to stay up all night as a silent protest.

Jerk.

The door opens a crack, and Hoffman walks in slowly and sits on the end of my bed. We sit in silence for a while, both pretending not to see the other. But somehow, I end up on his lap, talking to him in about 10 minutes, damn his irresistible charm.

I start to drift off, but as I do, I could swear I feel him kiss my head.

_**stay tuned!!!**_


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10

Disclaimer: I don't own it.

As I sweep my now shoulder length hair into a French twist, I run a finger down the now very faint scar on my cheek. Everything is healed now. The scar shouldn't have healed at all but Amanda knows this doctor guy who owes her one so she managed to get this cream that they save for rich people. A little foundation and it won't be visible anymore, just like they promised last night at dinner. I've taken to putting on makeup and perfume and pretty stuff now, just because I can. I'm not taking life for granted anymore. Slowly I begin to make up my face and wonder about what they're all doing now, Amanda is out at the hardware store, looking for the tiniest nails and screws she can find (I recommended a trap in which we scatter the floor in nails and make them walk across it to get the keys, or a large ball of battery acid will explode all over them) Jigsaw is at work and Hoffman is at a birthday party.

I've put last night's feelings down to drowsiness and hormonal imbalance. I was sleepy and upset about everything so I created the illusion that I had feelings for him.

Getting up I walk into the living room and draw the curtains, giving the guys in our neighbouring building my usual wave-wink-sexy smile look, then I make myself a bowl of cereal and turn on the T.V.

And see my face staring straight at me.

The news reporter is a sweaty man in his mid thirties, pit stains and a large bald spot. His voice echoes through my head.

'New leads on the case of Jade Alexon, the 25 year old police officer from Manhattan who went missing, just a few weeks ago. We have Malice Jones on the story.'

The screen switched to a picture of a young woman, standing outside the police station I used to work. Her voice was high pitched and exited.

'Alice Cooper, a single mother who lives just above Miss Alexon's apartment, saw her acting very suspiciously the night before she disappeared. She claims to have heard loud bangs from the apartment from upstairs, but put it down to the knowledge that Miss Alexon often came home very drunk. She has waited until now to come forward because her husband has been stalking her for the past 6 weeks and was afraid he would track her down…..'

No

Nonono…..

I left all of my old photos in my apartment. All of my fake documents, all of my things. I was never completely honest with the others, the police DID find some fingerprints on Jade Alexon's body, but didn't have the prints of me, Jade no-name. My prints are registered as Jade Alexon's…and my prints are all over my apartment. They match the ones on the body. There going to search the apartment. They'll know.

I sink to my knees in the centre of the living room, grabbing at everything I can, trying to feel some kind of safety, it doesn't work.

I curl up on the floor and begin to scream.

They know.

They know.

They know they know they know……

'So, after 6 weeks of searching, we finally might have some leads'

WHAT?

6 weeks? I do some quick sums in my head. It all adds up. I've been found out, they would have searched the apartment first thing, right mow they're matching my fingerprints to the ones on the body.

I wait for the stupid tears to come but they don't, instead I feel a raw fury boil up inside me, and a large ball of pure hate rise in the pit of my stomach. They _lied _to me. They said I'd be safe with them when they were really just waiting to turn me in. probably for trap money or pizza or muffins, there's probably some big reward for the criminal that is wanted for the murder of the police woman who was snatched away in her prime yadayada…….

They saved my life so they could lock me up.

They will pay DEARLY.

I whirl around the living room, ripping up the sofa cushions, shattering the cupboard doors, I grab several towels and shove them in the microwave then turn it on full blast. I kick the T.V in and as I do it, I catch a glimpse of myself in the mirror. They tried so hard to pretend they cared. They saved my life, and I trusted them. My stupid baby face and my stupid floppy hair, who cries over _**NOTHING!**_

My fist collides with the glass and I feel hot blood pour out, staining the carpet and splattering the walls. I sink to my knees holding my hand to my chest, still too furious to cry.

The front door opens. Its Hoffman.

'Jade! Oh my GOD what happened?? Did someone break in?'

My head snaps up and I look into his stupid, worried face.

'They're looking for me' I whisper 'they're looking for me and you didn't _**TELL ME!!'**_

Hoffman shuts his eyes and sighs.

'Jade, you were upset and scared. If we told you they were looking you could have had a heart attack.'

Oh.

The microwave bursts open, full of smoke and fire. Hoffman looks at me. He's……._laughing?_

In hysterics, he gets up and grabs a fire extinguisher from under the sink and puts out the burning microwave.

'Right, now that the microwave is fixed how about you get your hand seen to.'

Ashamed of my outburst I sit quietly at the table while Hoffman gets out a first aid kit.

Slowly, he begins to bandage my hand.

'Um…Jade' he says after a few silent minutes.

'I'm sorry, about rigging the trap. I- I was just scared and stupid and-and stupid a couple more times.'

'What were you scared of?' I ask'

'Well, when I saw you, I felt something. I loved the way your face lit up when you saw the key. I loved your smell and your voice, everything.'

Slowly I lean towards him and kiss him gently on the lips, I try to move away but I feel him start to kiss back. Slowly, we begin to wrap ourselves around each other in a warm embrace. He slowly frees his lips from mine, and whispers in my ear.

'Do you want to?'

More than ever.

'Oh GOD yes' I smile.

'That's all I needed to hear.'

Slowly. He leads me into his bedroom, stripping his clothes as he goes. I copy, unclasping the French twist and shredding the clothes I put on just a few hours ago. I turn to see Hoffman lying naked on the bed, and slowly sink down next to him. And our naked bodies begin to entwine, I lick his strong six pack, I bite his but cheeks, I suck his hands. I let him run his hands all over my body, and let him do things I could only dream about.

'Enough foreplay' he says finally. 'lets get started,' sweeter words were never spoken.

**Muahahaha!**


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter 11**

Disclaimer: I don't own it. Do you think id be wasting time on this website if I did? No offence, I'd just be eating fudge.

I wake up with the BIGGEST smile on my face. I curl up under the covers and laugh. I have just had sex with Hoffman.

5 TIMES!

Oh! I just love thinking about it. Licking him, slurping at him, the taste of him as I bit him. And the stuff HE did! AH! Now I don't envy the bagel because we've both been opened up and have Hoffman lick out our filling. Still, I can't really say much more. I poke my head out as I hear the door open, Hoffman walks in wearing only his boxers. I scoot over and let him lie next to me.

'Jigsaws gonna be _**pissed**_' sighs Hoffman.

'He won't hurt us.' I smile 'he loves me'

'Yeah. All the more reason for him to HATE me' groans Hoffman.

I put my finger to his lips, and kiss his forehead.

'lets not think about that.'

Laughing together, we both roll over so we're facing each other.

And Hoffman freezes

'baby?' I ask

he doesn't react, instead he just stares.

WHATS GOING ON?

'Hoffman, Hoffman you're scaring me' I plead.

'You son of a BITCH!'

I roll over to see Jigsaw standing in the doorway, His unusually white teeth barred. Quick as anything, he hauls me out of the bed and throws me on the floor. Then he turns to Hoffman.

'NO!' I sob 'please Jigsaw, don't hurt him!'

'Shut up' he growls. His face is purple, his breathing is laboured, and a giant vein is sticking out of his forehead.

'Jigsaw, please!' I scream, and run over to him. I wrap my arms around him but he throws me off.

His hands dart to Hoffman's throat.

But before they reach him, he staggers backwards. Clutching his heart. With one furious glance at Hoffman, he collapses.

'Jigsaw!' I begin to howl. I throw myself down next to him, and feel his pulse. It's there, but very faint.

'get Amanda' I say silently

'not here' Hoffman groans 'SHIT! Oh mother of fucking shit! I killed him Jade! I'm so fucking sorry!'

'hang on' I say, suddenly hit by inspiration.

I gently move Jigsaw into the recovery position, and take his pulse. Still fading. He needs a kick-start. Grabbing the bedside lamp and Hoffman's school compass, I rip open the wire and jam the compass into Jigsaw's arm. Then, I stick the wire into the cut. I clasp his hand and soon I feel little electric shocks going through my arm. I take his pulse again. Regular. Gently, I remove the wire and listen to his breathing. Damn. Still not breathing. I look up to see Hoffman pacing the room, banging his head and just groaning 'sorry'

'Hoffman! Come here' I say. He comes over.

'now, when I say, bang on his chest' he nods, clearly still too ashamed to talk. I push back jigsaw's head and pinch his nostrils and begin to breathe into him.1,2,3 I lift my head and scream 'NOW!' Hoffman thumps his chest hard. 1,2,3 BANG. 1,2,3,BANG! 1,2…….

Come on….

Please….

Jigsaw…

I love you so much, if only you could hear me. I'm not just some floosy, me and Hoffman made this decision together….

Don't hate me….

Don't die….. please….

'Mother of FUCK!' he sits up in a rush, coughing and gagging. When he's done he looks over to me.

'Hey' he smiles. I throw my arms around his neck, sobbing into him.

He's ALIVE

He's here

I won't lose him.

I

I….

I'm naked.

I rush to the closet and yank out a dressing gown and huddle inside while Hoffman helps Jigsaw up.

And we all walk into the living room for drinks.

'are we gonna tell Amanda?' I ask Jigsaw once we're all settled.

'no' states Jigsaw 'what she doesn't know won't hurt her. But I WILL tell her about you two'

me and Hoffman gaze at him.

'Why?' I ask

'well I'm assuming you two are going to keep seeing each other, do you really want to run the risk of getting caught?'

'wait' says Hoffman 'is that an OK from you?'

'well I cant really stop you now can I?' laughs Jigsaw

and we all just sit there, smiling. But inside I know that things won't go down well with Amanda…..

**more soon.**

**Hahaha….I like fudge.**


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter 12**

**Disclaimer: i don't own saw.....mmm muffins....**

The front door bursts open, Amanda storms through the apartment in a wave of fury, smashing the windows, breaking the silver, ripping off the cupboard doors. Hoffman runs out and tries to stop her but she throws him off with surprising strength. Jigsaw screams in pain as she twists his arm behind his back, and wrestles him to the ground. Then she turns to me, I'm sitting cross legged on the floor with a drink in front of me. Amanda reaches towards me, I feel her hands grab my throat.....

I sit up in a cold sweat, my nightdress hitched up around my waist. It's morning, She'll be back from her search now. We've got a big line of players lined up and Amanda was in a really great mood when she came home last night.

Maybe she'll understand.........

' Come on' sighs Hoffman as he comes in 'Lets get this over with' gently, he takes my hands and leads me into the living room where Amanda is sitting on the couch with a cup of coffee and a bowl of cereal. Jigsaw is standing in front of her, looking grave. Me and Hoffman join him'

'what's this all about?' Groans Amanda

'well...' starts Jigsaw

'we, have some news...' continues Hoffman

'WHAT???' yells Amanda, setting down her coffee and bowl 'Did you kill someone?' her mouth is open, about to make more cruel accusations, when her eyes drift to me and Hoffman. Our hands are still linked. Slowly, Amanda stands up, picks up her coffee mug......SMASH!!!!! it hits the wall and shatters, covering the floor in coffee.

'YOU! AFTER ALL THE SHIT HE PUT YOU THROUGH, AFTER ALL THE FUCKING AWFUL THINGS HE DID, YOU AND HIM ARE-'

'PLEASE!' i scream, grabbing at her arm 'let us explain!' with one big shove i find myself on the floor with large pieces of china stuck in my back while Hoffman tries to calm her down.

'You know what? Fuck this' she yells, and with that, Amanda storms out of the apartment. For a few moments, we all freeze. Stunned. Then, it dawns on us what's happened. Slowly and silently, i stand up and begin to pull the pieces of china out of me, Hoffman grabs the first aid kit and begins to dab at the cuts on my back and my legs, and Jigsaw works at the stains on the carpet. When everyone's dry and well, not bleeding we slump on the couch. Tears stream down my face, Jigsaw gets out his cell phone and tries to text Amanda but the number is blocked, he tries to call her on the house phone but she isn't picking up. Eventually he gives up and goes to bed, Hoffman waits with me for a while but eventually turns in himself. I wait a long time, just trying to make sense of everything. The worst part is that.....well, my period is 1 week late, and.........

my stomach is getting bigger.

I drift into a deep sleep, but i just can't help sleeping on my side, holding both hands over my stomach.

Oh my God.......

this just proves NO GOOD can come from having sex with Hoffman. OK, apart from a really good time and funny noises.


	13. Chapter 13

**CHAPTER 13:**

**DISCLAIMER: you know….I don't own saw but I want to.**

**I pace around the bathroom, my hands clamped over my gut. The test lays on the edge of the sink, the seconds ticking away. I look in the full length mirror at my swollen tummy. I've taken to wearing loose sweaters to hide the bulk from Hoffman and jigsaw but I don't know how much longer I can keep it from them. I have to know. The timer on my watch rings, signalling the end of the 3 minutes. Slowly, I pick up the test. And there it is. The blue line.**

**I'm pregnant.**

**With a murderer's baby.**

**I groan in frustration and sink to the ground, clutching my stomach. WHY TODAY? The day I'm supposed to be attending Lester Medley's high school for the first Frigging time? What happens if I get my stomach knocked? Or someone notices that my gut is bigger than the rest of me? It MUST be too late to abort, and even if it isn't, I'll have to tell Jigsaw…..and Hoffman. And I know EXACTLY what will happen then:**

**1. Jigsaw will go crazy**

**2. Hoffman will be miserable.**

**3. Jigsaw will make Hoffman and me break up**

**4. Hoffman will NEVER come near me again, or worse, leave.**

**5. Jigsaw will wrap me in cotton wool forever!**

**Yippee………**

**Wait a minute……**

**What am I saying? **

**Why do they have to know, its none of their business. OK, it is Hoffman's baby, but does he really deserve to know? I mean, its not like he took any precautions or anything. It's settled, until I figure something out, the cant know.**

**I stand up and get dressed into the black skirt and red sweater. Thankfully, it's huge on me so it won't show that I'm getting bigger. I pull on some tights and boots, add just a little makeup and I look just like an ordinary kid.**

**Slowly I enter the kitchen.**

'**Hurry up kid were late!' yells Hoffman, grabbing a piece of toast from the counter, he grabs my hand and pulls me out of the house. When were out of the door he thrusts my bag at me and drags me to the bus stop, just as we turn the corner we see the bus pull up at the stop.**

'**WAIT!' yells Hoffman, and he starts sprinting to the bus. Mercifully, it stops. Good, because if we had to walk I think I might have spilled to Hoffman that I'm pregnant. I slump in my seat while Hoffman chatters to me as we speed towards school. I don't like it. I can feel my skin crawl as I think about walking into that classroom, and seeing all of those kids staring at me. Then I think about what will happen when they find out I can't read. I see their faces, I can hear their laughs and feel their hands laying into me when the teachers aren't looking. They hit my head, my back, my stomach………**

'**Jade? You ok?' I look up to see Hoffman looking me in the eye, he looks scared.**

'**oh, Hoffman-' I start**

'**no!' he whispers 'you have to call me Bob, or Robbie' I stare at him and sigh**

'**Robbie, what am I going to do when they find out that' I look around in case I see anyone from our school, I'm safe, its just old ladies 'I cant read' I say finally. "Robbie" grins **

'**don't worry, 'DAD' told them you were some super genius and bumped you up a couple of years, you're in all my classes. Ill sit next to you and do your work for you'**

**wow**

**he really loves me**

**and yet…..**

**I'm lying to him about his child…..**

**But I can't tell him now**

'**thanks' I sigh, relaxing a little, at least I'll know one person. **

**The bus stop abruptly and I slowly slip off, followed by Hoffman. Medley's high school looks just as bad as the uniform, a large red building with big black wrought iron gates at the front, there's a sigh hanging from one of the gates, it looks like a warning sign, but someone's sprayed a giant cock on it. I can't help giggling.**

'**I did that one' laughs Robbie, walking me towards a small side gate **

'**ooh! Bad boy' I smile.**

**When we enter the courtyard my smile grows, everyone looks pretty nice, I was expecting a bunch of chavs with hair extensions and those gay luminous hair bands. In my police days I arrested a few girls like that. Robbie walks me towards a cluster of boys and girls, all trapped deep in conversation.**

'**wait till you meet the guys' he grins**

'**wont I cramp your style?' **

'**oh, trust me. What I say goes'**

**as we near the group, a tall red haired boy looks up and yells**

'**ROBBIE!'**

**everyone turns, and we're bombarded with 'Robbie's and 'Bob's and 'who's this's once everyone's done saying hi, Robbie finally has a chance to talk.**

'**this is my kid sister Alex' he boasts 'real braniac, dad's managed to bump her up a few years so she's in my class.' Everyone smiles at me. The red kid takes my hand and kisses it.**

'**names Mickey' he says smoothly. Robbie's fist comes down on his shoulder hard**

'**put it away' he says darkly. 'Anyway, lets get the intro's overwith' he points to a tall brown haired girl 'this is Amy' then to an even taller red haired girl 'Kat' then a kid with green and red hair 'fruit shoot, he doesn't tell us his name' then a boy with long black hair, tied up in a ponytail 'max'. they all look really great, except for the fact that I'm the shortest. **

**The bell rings.**

'**oops! Lets go' grins Amy, taking my hand she leads me away from the rest. Kat follows. Robbie gives me a thumbs up. In class, as promised, we all sit in a row. Robbie next to me in the middle. Apparently, word of me has spread, because suddenly our table is swarmed by kids asking us questions and tugging at my hair and tipping by pencil case upside down. It takes a while but I manage to answer all questions. Then the teacher comes in and we start work. Hoffman carefully slips my book on top of his, and slips a full one out in front of me.**

'**I got held back last year' he whispers 'we did the EXACT same thing' I grin at him and start drawing a little flower pattern in the margin. Little flower big flower little flower big flower long line of ivy, big flower little flower big flower little flower long li-**

'**ALEXUS JACKSON!' my head snaps up from the page to see the teacher standing at the front of the class with a bag in her hand. My bag.**

'**ma'am why do you have my bag?' I ask, trying to sound as calm as possible**

'**let ME ask the questions miss Jackson.' She barks 'why, may I ask, do you have 12 packets of chewing gum in your bag?' that's it? I was really scared there, in case she'd found the knife I keep in the makeup pocket, or the smoke pellets in the box of tampons. Stress can KILL a baby! Not that she knows that I'm pregnant, but still, baby wants revenge. My voice turns dark.**

' **I don't know miss, why are you searching my bag. Were you just looking for gum, ore are you a reformed paedophile who took one look at a young girls school bag and decided if you cant molest little boys anymore, you'll turn to the alternative'**

**the whole class erupts into laughter. The teacher's ears turn red and she drops my bag to the floor.**

'**GET OUT!' she screeches**

'**ok' I sigh 'I'll just go and tell the principal that you were going through my bag without permission'**

'**it is my legal right' she announces**

'**not if you took something and destroyed it' I smile**

'**but I didn't' she sighs**

'**they don't know that, I could just say you broke my phone in half, I need a new one'**

'**ITS MY WORD AGAINST YOURS!'**

'**NAME ONE PERSON HERE WHO WOULDN'T BACK ME UP!'**

**silence**

**I win.**

'**sit down.' She sighs, and throws me my bag.**

**I sit down.**

'**now class, I just have to step out and do something, I expect perfect behaviour while I'm gone' looking frazzled she steps out of the room. The minute the door closes, the whole class cheers. I laugh with them, but out of all of them, the one that claps the loudest, is baby. It congratulates me with a tiny kick.**

**The rest of the day goes great, in gym we all skip class and throw water balloons over the big fence on the field-it goes straight into the field at the old folks home next door-then at lunch we listen in on the staff meeting. Then we have IT, Spanish and science, me, Kat and Amy spend them in the bathrooms doing I-pod's makeup and water fights.**

**Then, when it's time to go home, they all come with Robbie and me to our door. One we're in and they're gone, Robbie takes me and kisses me hard.**

'**you have no idea how hard it was not to do that' he groans**

'**yes I do' I sigh 'I had to not do that for weeks'**

'**don't' he murmurs, kissing my neck, running his tongue up it 'don't, make me, guilty'**

'**why' I laugh he looks down at me ferociously**

'**you won't like me when I'm guilty' he lifts me up and carries me up the stairs to the bedroom, I curl up In his arms, sighing. But then..**

'**what was that?' asks Hoffman**

'**what was what?' I ask**

'**that bump'**

**Oh no…….**

**I struggle out of Hoffman's arms and groan**

'**what's wrong' he asks**

'**I-I got the thing' I say hastily, and run into the bathroom. I sit on the toiled and groan. Why, why, must we need protection?**

'**it's ok baby' says Hoffman through the door 'one more week. I know this must suck' after a while I hear him walking away. The baby kicks again.**

'**that was your daddy' I whisper 'don't worry, he loves you. He just doesn't know yet'**


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter 14

Disclaimer: you don't own saw, I don't own saw, NOBODY HERE OWNS SAW!

I moan as the doorbell rings. It's Amy and Kat, 'Robbie' invited them for a study thingy. If there's one thing I don't need, its people hanging around my door and risking my secret. I didn't empty the trash after I threw the test away, I didn't think to. I haven't worn any of my tight stuff for weeks now, so they'll probably notice that too. Kat and Amy might be a little rough around the edges but damn it there not stupid. It's too late to make up for my mistakes now, they're already running around, looking at stuff and talking loudly. As I watch their excitement I can't help but feel good. OK, so they're here at a really shit time and yes, there's a really good chance that one of them will find the test and smell a rat, but Kat and Amy are like my best friends now and I want to spend every minute with them. My favourite part is their outfits. Amy is stick thin, but she doesn't try to show it off, wearing T-shirts and baggy jeans everywhere. Kat doesn't care about weight either. She's not quite as thin as Amy is but she's just as pretty. She ties her long red hair into bunches on top of her head, and wears shorts and camisoles. I don't really have a style. Before baby came I wore tight tops and short skirts, just because I could. I never thought about what effect they might have had on anybody else.

'OH, MY, GOD!' screeches Kat, jumping and pointing at the wall. Amy, Rob and me all look over to see a completely blank, white washed wall. I think Kat has problems.

'Yes Kat, we call that a wall' sighs Rob, sitting back in his chair. He's doing both mine and his homework, biology. I hate biology. It always lets you down.

'no' grins Kat, skipping over to the wall 'it's hollow' she knocks at it hard, the wall makes a sort of echoed thunk. She's right. Hollow.

'Cool….' I breathe. My hands instinctively move to my gut, protecting the teeny foetus. Amy looks at me. For some reason I feel exposed under her gaze, I stand up and walk over to Kat.

'How'd you know?' I ask quickly. I look back at Amy to see if her expression has changed. It has. She looks like she's decided something big.

'Maybe she knew by the big gaping whole in the wall' laughs Rob, oblivious to the tension. He points to the top left part of the wall, where, as he said, a large piece of it is missing. Kat turns around, red faced.

'WELL PARDON ME FOR ACTUALLY GETTING EXITED ABOUT SOMETHING, UNLIKE THOSE OF US WHO JUST SIT IN THE DARK CRYING ALL DAY!'

It all happens in a flash.

Rob's hand flies out and knocks Kat flying, she lands with a thump on the floor and screams a he advances on her. He'll do it. He's mad enough to. I think even Amy knows these are Kat's last moments. I act fast. My leg flies out and Rob lands in a heap on the couch. I wait for him to stand up, full of rage, but he doesn't. Instead, he lies there, sobbing into the couch cushions. Amy rushes Kat into the bathroom and locks the door. Clever girl. Slowly, I approach Rob.

'Rob?'

No answer

I take a few steps closer

'Rob?'

Nothing

I crouch my his head and whisper in his ear

'Hoffman?'

He rolls over to face me, his eyes red and puffy. In that split second I see that he truly is hurting over something, and I think I know what.

'You miss her, don't you?' I ask quietly

Hoffman nods

'I know, I miss her too. If it weren't for her id be dead, long dead'

His fist clenches, and new tears brim his eyes. When he speaks, his voice is croaky.

'You know how, no-one could contact Amanda after she left?'

I nod

'Well, I tracked her down at her new place. It took a while but she eventually told me why she'd left'

My throat gets tight.

'Why?'

He looks at me

'She thinks you're pregnant'

No.

He's not supposed to know that.

I try to answer him but before I can Amy calls.

'JADE! COME HERE! HURRY!' Hoffman's eyes widen.

'You stay here.' I whisper 'I'll fix it' I run to the bathroom door and bang hard, Amy opens it slowly and leads me in. nothing seems wrong, Kat's up and healthy, apart from a sore cheek. Amy's fine too. What exactly is going on?

'Sit down' says Kat I sit on the loo and look up at both of them. They both look half-angry and half-terrified.

'Anything you want to tell us Jade?' demands Amy.

'No' I say shakily, this feels like a prison movie

'Not tired?' Kat asks, looking me in the eyes

'n-no'

'Been sick?'

'No'

'Mood swings?'

'No'

They both look at each other, and shake their heads. Amy produces a ball of tissues from her pocket. Slowly, she unwraps them. And there, in her hand, is the pregnancy test.

'wh-whats-' I begin

'NO' growls Amy 'tell us what you've been up to.'

I look up into their eyes, on the surface, all I see is pure fury, but as I stare, I can still see the same sweet, friendly girls who I became friends with just 2 weeks ago. I need to play on that.

I bury my head in my hands and sigh, tears seep through my eyelids and I look up to my friends.

'I was so scared. He- he said that if I didn't do it he-he'd hit me, and keep hitting me until I did it, I couldn't stop him. I really, wanted to b-but he had this-s really big

kni-fe and..'

I collapse into a pile of false/real sobs. They were fake because I was just using them to throw the girls off, but they were real because I knew that now Hoffman would HAVE to know.

'oh my god' whispered Kat, sitting down next to me. 'I'm so, so sorry'

Amy groans and rubs my back gently, I can feel her shaking.

A long time passes, I hear Hoffman bustling around in the kitchen. I know what Amy's going to say next...I just hope I'm wrong. I'm not

'we need to tell Bob' she whispers. I nod and get up quietly, Kant and Amy follow me into the living room, and stand on each of my sides. Hoffman is sitting at the table with a chicken sandwich, over his little tizzy. I sigh.

'Rob. I have something to tell you.'

he looks up, a piece of lettuce sticking out of his mouth. I sigh.

'I'm pregnant'

Silence.

The mouthful he's chewing drops from his mouth onto the floor.

After a while the silence gets too much for me, and I talk.

'I-it was an accident, I was walking home and this-this big guy….he had a knife.'

Hoffman stands. Looking hurt.

'Kat. Amy. Please leave'

They go quietly. I listen to the sound of their footsteps and wonder if it's the last time I'll ever hear them. Hoffman slumps on the couch, tears in his eyes. I sit gingerly next to him.

'it's yours.' I whisper gently.

'I know' he sighs

'and I'm keeping it'

'I know'

More silence.

I sigh heavily, and admit the thing that's been eating at me for weeks.

'I tried to convince myself that I wasn't telling you, because I was angry at you for not using protection. But that's a lie. I was scared. I thought that, because you and me weren't married or, I was young, you'd make me abort.'

Hoffman looks down at me, and for the first time today, he smiles.

' I would never make you do that.'

I blush.

'and, as for the whole marriage thing.'

He gets down on the floor

'Jade. Will you marry me?'

**I didn't even know I was going to add that part!!!**


	15. Chapter 15

Trapped chapter 15

Disclaimer: I don't own saw but I BET you guys wish I did!!!

In the space of 35 seconds Jigsaw's face shows a mix of emotions. Rage. Fear. Happiness. Confusion. Eventually he settles on confusion and sighs.

'How?'

Hoffman looks to me and nods.

'Ok,' I start 'about a month ago I took a pregnancy test, and it came out positive. I was really afraid that you guys would have made me abort, so I decided to keep it a really big secret. But, yesterday when Amy and Kat were over her for our study shit thingy, Amy found the test. And I told them that I'd been raped. Then we sent them home and talked .I told Hoffman why I hadn't told him; I was afraid that because we weren't married he'd make me abort. Then he well….proposed.

I stroke the slender ring on my left hand. It's silver with a piece of Emerald in the centre. Well, when Hoffman gave it to me he said that it was just some cheap thing he picked up at an auction, but you don't go 13 years on the street and not know your stuff. He got _**very**_ lucky that night. But now's not the time to think about that, we need to ask Jigsaw for a favour.

'Jigsaw' says Hoffman quietly 'will you do the Honours?'

A large smile crosses his face, and in moments we are all trapped in a large, murderous embrace. Its odd. These are the same people who killed a doctor and kidnapped his family. And yet they're treating me like I'm some sort of goddess. Not that I have any complaints about that.

'and I know what we're doing to celebrate' grins jigsaw. 'get in the car'

We all rush out of the house and into the car,(I have to go in the back….stupid giant baby stomach) and we start to speed off down the street. As we get closer I begin to recognise parts of the town. The buildings, the billboards….wait….NO WAY!! I scream and hug Hoffman through the chair.

'You catch on quick' laughs Jigsaw, as we pull up outside the warehouse. I rush in, and throw myself into the camera room. Switching on all the monitors I see PEOPLE lying unconscious in the rooms. My heart flies wildly.

'what's first?!?!' I scream, dying for some traps.

'yours' whispers Hoffman, pointing to a screen showing an unconscious woman with a large exercise ball attached to her back, the is surrounded by a sea of thumb tacks, needles, drawing pins safety pins, broken glass. The room is the size of our high school football field, and right at the and Is a large bucket of battery acid. The same liquid that fills the exercise ball. On her back is a timer, reading '60.00' 60 seconds to get to the other end.

Hoffman puts a microphone in front of me , and the woman wakes up.

'names carol, she shot her husband, and used his money to buy her own gym.' Grins Jigsaw

'Hello Carol. I want to play a game.' I talk into it normally but the voice that enters the room is dark, much like the saw movie puppet.

'w-who are you?' she whispers, standing up with great difficulty.

'that is unimportant' I continue 'what's important is you. Your husband gave you nothing but love and affection, he treated you like a queen. And yet, your obsession with yourself overthrew his love. How did it feel? When you put that first motherfucking bullet in his brain? Well, now you have a chance to REALLY work out. On your back is a ball full of battery acid, with a timer attached. In 60 seconds, it'll explode. Or, you can run through this ocean of pain to your real goal. More acid. At the bottom there's a timer that will deactivate the ball. Lets see how tough you really are. Let the games begin' I switch off the microphone and watch intently as the woman screams. she starts walking, screeching and crying as the pointy objects dig into her. Her tied hands pull frantically, trying to get out of the rope, but her foolish attempts are fruitless. She starts crying. Pathetic. Even I didn't cry in MY first saw trap.

30 seconds

Halfway there

20 seconds

Almost

She gats to the end and sticks her head into the bucket.

And doesn't resurface.

00:00

The ball explodes, covering the rest of the life less body in acid. She flops to the floor, and we get our first look at her mangled, melted face.

One eye hangs out of its socket by her visual cords, the other is gone completely. Her cheeks and forehead are gone, showing the white scull underneath, she is now completely bald. The rest of her body is basically the same.

A long silence passes in the camera room.

'_**THAT WAS FREAKIN' AWESOME!'**_ I screech.

The others nod in agreement.

The next is a gay ice dancer who's cheated on his lover. We make him eat 20 condoms in 10 minutes. He survives that one. Just

Then a rapist social worker (complicated egg/ rabbit trap) (dead)

Then a pet napper/vet (locked in a hot tub with 2000 rats and tarantulas for 1:40:00 (dead)

Then a comedian murderer, he has to recite every joke he knew, if he forgets any of them an anvil gets dropped on him (dead)

The final one is curious, a 30-year-old man. His wife is pregnant and he's left her because she's got too fat. He is in the angel trap. But instead of battery acid, it is this weird Smokey stuff that, according to Jigsaw, is so cold if bear skin touched it then it would have to be amputated. But instead of begging and pleading for his life, the man just sticks his head right in the tub. I wonder if he left his wife for different reasons.

On the way home I wonder what my wedding will be like. I'm thinking small, we might not even go anywhere for it, we need witnesses but you can drag any old tramp off the street and….wait. I used to BE a tramp. I can't forget my roots just because things have worked out. Ok, so we wont use tramps. Maybe a dog? Or a random stranger?

The car pulls up outside the apartment, and to my shock, Amy is waiting at the door. She's… wearing a dress.

'shit' groans Hoffman 'our date.'

In a split second, my heart shatters. Hoffman looks down at he and gasps

'don't worry babe. She just asked me out. I couldn't say no, I've already turned down half the girls in the school. don't worry, it doesn't mean anything. Just make sure you take the ring off'

reluctantly I slip the little slither of silver off my finger. Hoffman gets out of the car and walks away with Amy, whispering in her ear.

As I lay my head down to rest that night, I know I love him a little less.


	16. Chapter 16

Disclaimer: I OWN NOTHING! I DON'T OWN SAW, THIS WEBSITE THIS HOUSE, THIS ROOM, OR THIS LAPTOP!!!

9 o'clock

10 o'clock

11

Midnight.

Jigsaw got bored with giving me updates ages ago, so I'm relying on the radio for the time. Hoffman and Amy have been gone for ages now.

Hoffman and Amy.

Robbie and Amy.

Jackson and Price.

Why does this bother me so much? It's not like they're having sex or anything…..or are they? Why did he even say yes?

'Sh! We'll wake everyone'

Oh God they're back.

And not alone.

Amy, Hoffman, Kat and Fruit shoot burst through the door together, the first thing I smell is strong and stagnant. Alcohol.

'Ah! There she is, the yummy mummy herself!' shrieks Fruit Shoot, tossing me a cell phone 'got some great photos of uh…stuff. Innit Hoff?'

I freeze

'OH PLEASE! We've always known!' shrieks Kat, flopping on the couch 'just, didn't know you did.' I relax slightly, but why didn't Hoffman tell me?

Him and Amy throw themselves onto the other couch, and to my shock, start kissing like crazy. oh my god. whats happening? Why is he doing this to me? Why can't he just choose one of us? Is he punishing me?

Jigsaw comes in, grins at us all and waltzes over to his bedroom.

'Hey Jiggy?' calls Kat

'Yep?'

'Can I uh….see some traps?'

'Sure'

They follow each other into Jigsaws room, leaving me and the others in an uncomfortable silence. Slowly, Amy and Hoffman make their way into his bedroom.

WHY IS HE DOING THIS?

DOESN'T HE LOVE ME?

IS THIS HIS WAY OF TELLING ME IT'S OVER?

I can't believe that Amy would do this to me. She knows how much Hoffman means to me, IF he's being honest with her. I slump on the couch and moan. FS sit next to me and smiles.

'I know it sucks' he whisper's 'to see your best friend with your ex is just shit'

'What?' me and Hoffman aren't apart…..oh my god. THAT SICK, TWISTED SON OF A BITCH. AMY ISN'T BETRAYING ME. THAT CUNT'S LYING TO HER.

Well. Two can play at that game. I slowly, wrap my arms around FC's neck, and kiss him. We start doing what me and Hoff did just a month ago. Only so much better, because it's angry, fierce, and vengeful. Tonight, I betray one of the loves of my life. But I avenge someone better. It kicks happily all night long. weird. how no-one notices how Kat NEVER GOES HOME.

I sit calmly at the breakfast table, waiting for my time. around noon (according to t.v lady) i hear Amy walking around Hoffman's bed room. it's time.

i burst into peals of fake, yet uncontrolable tears. Amy rushes through the door and puts her arm around me.

'JADE! jade what's wrong?'

i push her away in false anger. strangely, its easy to pretend to mad at amy. maybe because she deserves it.

'YOU! YOU SLUTTY, PATHETIC, LYING CHEATIING EXCUSE FOR A FRIEND!' im screaming so loud, Jigsaw, Kat and FS all rush out of their bedrooms. Amy looks hurt.

'jade, i know that you and Hoffman were an item, and-and i know he's the father but, you two have to move on-'

'WE DIDN'T BREAK UP YOU STUPID LITTLE WHORE! HE LIED TO YOU, AND NOW, NOW HE LOVES YOU. HES TURNING HIS BACK ON ME AND THE BABY FOR YOU!'

silence.

when amy speaks next, her voice is cracked and shaky.

'you-you didn't break up?'

with even shakier hands, i show her the ring Hoffman had given me. as i look up to Amy, i see her heart break. kat and FS both gasp. Jigsaw looks ashamed.

'i'm so sorry Jade. when i say Hoff and Amy, i was going to say something but' he looks at Kat 'i got distracted'

kat looks at me uncomfortably

'i hope you dont mind...me and jigsaw'

i smile

'it's good he has somebody. but, i think that Hoffman's being a bit selfish. all those in favour of making him pay?'

all hands go up. Jigsaw and FC both dissapear into Hoffman's room, and reappear with him looking slightly worn out and very confused. they throw him onto the floor at our feet.

'hoffman' me and Amy say in unison. 'tell us the truth'

he looks up at us, his eyes full of fear.

'i'm sorry.' he mutters

THAT'S IT? my boot connects with his head, knocking him backwards.

'YOU CUNT! is that all you can say for yourself? you knock me up, propose to me, make me think that we can be a real family, you, me, and OUR BABY. didn't you think of that? dont you care that our child will grow up thinking youre a scumbag?' tears stream down my face. real ones this time. now it's Amy's turn.

'you. you told me that you and Jade were over. that you and me that could be toghether. and now, i find that one, you didn't leave her, two, she didn't even know what you were doing, and THREE, you were going to walk out on your own child? youre a cunt. that child doesn't deserve you.'

she stamps on his nose hard, i hear it crack. broken. Kat steps forward.

'Hoffman. me and you have been friends for a while, and, at one point i liked you like Amy and Jade do. but i always chickened out of telling you. and you know what? i'm glad. because if i had, i know you would NEVER have cared about me. i hate you.' she kicks his crotch like it's a soccer ball.

FS takes a deep breath

'you know what? Hoffman, you're a lucky bastard. Jade is one of the sweetest girls i've ever met. and if the baby is anything like her its the luckiest little kid ever. shes smart, funny, strong, sweet. and oh yeah, a fireball in bed. but you threw all that away for amy. and you didnt even respect her did you? no. you made her betray her best friend in the world. loser.' he removes his ear ring and sticks it into hoffman's gut.

last but not least, jigsaw.

'Hoff. i trusted you. when i first met Jade i thought she was weak, pathetic and a faliure, but she became not just my friend, but almost a daughter to me. you tried to take that away from me. so when i saw that you and her were together i thought that you were finally ready to redeem yourself. but now i realise, that you didnt ever want her did you? you never stopped tourturing her. do the world a favour Hoffman. Die.' he spits on him.

then i spit on him.

then kat

then amy

then FC.

slowly, Hoffman gets up, and looks me in the eye. tears spill down his cheeks. and mine.

'i thought you loved me.' he whisperes

'yeah' i say 'so did i'

the doorbell rings.

jigsaw gets up but i cant keep staring at Hoff so i get up and answer

the door open's.

its Amanda.

but that's not the scary part.

the scary part

is the two men in black suits next to her.

and the badges they're wearing.

i know i can't read.

but even i know what the three letters on their badges are

FBI


	17. Chapter 17

CHAPTER 17

**DISCLAIMER:**** I OWN NOTHING.**

I STAND THERE. BARELY DARING TO BREATHE, ALL IS SILENT IN THE APARTMENT BEHIND ME. EVEN BABY ISNT KICKING ME ANYMORE. THE FBI MEN ARE STARTING TO LOOK SUSPICIOUS, FINGERING THE GUNS IN THEIR POCKETS.

SUDDENLY, JIGSAW SNAPPES INTO ACTION.

'HELLO INSPECTOR!' HE SAYS FALSELY, PUSHING ME OUT OF THE WAY OF THE DOOR 'HOW MAY I HELP YOU?'

'INSPECTOR MAX SCALLEY' SAYS THE ONE TO AMANDA'S LEFT 'OUR FRIEND HERE TELLS US YOU HAVE SOME INFORMATION ON THE JIGSAW KILLER'

'Yes ARTHUR' smirks Amanda 'you told me little ALEX here saw something'

Uninvited, Amanda and the two inspectors barge in and flop on the couch. Hoffman dashes into the kitchen, and starts licking his wounds, pulling out the earring and rubbing his nose. Amy and Kat run to the bathroom to try and control themselves, and Jigsaw and FS sit beside me on the other couch.

'So.' Asks the inspector on Amanda's right 'what did you see Miss Jackson?'

Ok, finally I can do something to help. I can lie.

'I-I was walking home last weekend, I had been kept after school for blowing bubble gum. I cut down an alleyway when I-I saw a really weird guy holding a sack. Then he saw me and-and…' fake tears again.

I've run out of steam, but they aren't likely to hassle me while I'm 'crying' I need some r and r so I run to the bathroom to see how Kat and Amy are.

They're slumped on the floor holding their heads in their hands. Damn. I was hoping they'd be planning an escape. I flop onto the floor and join them in wallowing.

'I can't believe she's done this' I groan 'I mean, I'm not even showing yet, but she must know I'm pregnant, how can she do this?'

'Because she's sick' spits Amy, trying to stop the tears streaming down her face.

'OK, I'LL JUST GO AND SEE HOW THE GIRLS ARE DOING!' yells Jigsaw, and he bursts through the door, into the now crowded bathroom.

'Jigsaw, we-' I start

'Scream' he pants

'Uh…what?'

'Scream'

Without thought I take a deep breath, and screech. The minute it starts Jigsaw slams his fist against the bathroom tiles. To my shock it sinks into the wall, and the bottom of the bathtub disappears, showing a set of underground steps. I stop screaming. Amy puts her head around the door and yells.

'Rob, FS! We need you. NOW!'

'Sorry' they say in unison, happy to be leaving the awkward sitting room. Once they're in and the doors bolted Hoffman laughs as he sees the hole in the tub.

'JIGSAW! You sly bastard! You kept it!'

'He kept what?' I ask 'where do those steps go?'

'To an underground bunker under the warehouse' grins Hoffman, leaping over the edge of the bath, and onto the stone steps '50 feet of solid concrete between the warehouse floor and it. We've had it for years'

My eyes widen 'then doesn't Amanda-'

'Yes' interrupts Hoff 'but when she left, we moved it while you were at school'

I stare daggers at him, wishing I had heat vision.

'Ok' sighs Jigsaw, running his hands through his thinning hair 'it won't be too long until they notice we're gone, so we need to be fast.' He looks to me 'You, Amy, Fruit shoot and Kat will go down first, me and ass-face here will stay back to make things convincing, there's a switch down there that shuts the passage. Flick it, we'll be along in 5 minutes.'

I look down at the dark passage, and tremble. I stare up into Jigsaw's eyes.

'You promise?'

It takes him a while to answer

'Yes'

FS takes my hand and helps me over the edge of the bath and onto the stairs. Him and me go down a few more steps to make room for Amy and Kat, then Amy flicks the switch, plunging us into darkness. I shudder. The stairs go down so far I can't see the end, just a faint light at the end.

'I'll go first' Demands Kat, storming ahead. She so like Jigsaw I can't help laughing while we all descends into darkness.

'You and Jigsaw are a perfect match Kat.'

'Thanks' she giggles 'who says life ends at 50?'

'Nobody' interrupts Amy 'I hate it when people say that'

'Me too' adds Fruit shoot ' And I think our Jade here proves that you're never too young.' I shove him. He shoves me back, but only gently. I clasp his hand in the dark, and feel a strange sense of security. That was one thing I never felt with Hoffman, he always made me feel on the edge, like I didn't have long left. Perhaps because he's killed so many people. I mean, so have I but he kills them for FUN. I killed someone to stay alive.

We slowly descend deeper underground. I hear traffic and police cars and crying babies. If Hoff and Jigsaw are in the tunnel, they're very far behind. Eventually, all conversation ends, and we all listen intently to the sound of our footsteps, and the sound of the traffic disappearing. Hour after hour of endless walking. We get to the older, crumbled parts of the tunnel. I walk into cobwebs and spider webs, Amy and Kat trip over the sudden rocks that stick up from out of the ground, and I slowly begin to stroke my little foetus. I stop being scared, and get bored instead. Even if Amanda's found the passage, they won't have come this far down. They would have brought in stuff like cranes and diggers. We would have heard. Eventually, the stairs end, and we're faced with a long, almost endless hallway. It's only now that I realise that Jigsaw sent the 4 people that know nothing of his plan. Still at least it's lighter down here, bare light-bulbs flicker on the concrete ceiling. I don't like looking at it, knowing how far down we are. We begin to walk forwards, and soon I realise that the hall isn't as long as I first thought. I see a large rectangle in the wall at the end with a handle. A door. FS steps forward, pulling a knife from his pocket.

'I'll go first'

he open's the door.

'HOLY SHIT!'

we all rush in to see Hoffman and Jigsaw slumped on 2 comfy couches, in what almost looks like a living room. Only no T.V.

'how….how did?' I stammer

'shortcut babe' grins Hoffman, stretching out, 'we forgot to tell you we installed it.'

_**OH HOW I LONG FOR HEAT VISION!**_

I sigh and flop onto the carpeted floor, and begin to sob. Hoffman stays on the couch, staring at me. But Fruit shoot is there in an instant, getting me to sit up and comforting me. I look into his eyes and feel safe. But I also feel bad. I spent a beautiful night with him, I treated him like I loved him, and I haven't even thanked him for all he's done. I know in an instant what I want. I want someone who makes me feel safe, not edgy

Someone who will love me, not use me.

Someone who will love me up, not knock me up.

I want Fruit shoot.

My hands slide around his neck and my lips meet his, and soon we begin to continue where we left off last night. Hoffman stands up and storms into another room, and I hear him banging against the wall. Kat and Jigsaw climb onto the couch, I can hear angry kissing over our passionate embrace, soon it becomes a symphony, like ebony and ivory. The baby kicks. I don't know how long we'll be here, but I know that my baby will be free. I will NOT let it live the life I have. I want Fruit shoot's name on the birth certificate. HE will be my baby's father.

That reminds me…

'Fruit shoot?' I whisper

'Yes' he pants

'what IS your real name?'

he laughs

'Alex'

'then, the baby will be too'

'what if it's a girl?'

'Alexus. Alex for short'

we continue with our session, eventually Kat and Jigsaw wear themselves out and fall asleep on each other on the couch. Alex tries but even he soon dozes off. I drift off too, but in the back of my mind I can't shake the feeling, that Amanda may be watching us right now….


	18. Chapter 18

**Disclaimer: I own nothing but a mind that won't quit. And a muffin**

We've been down here for 7 months now. Jigsaw says that the FBI takes forever to stop looking. Its so strange waking up every morning and never seeing the sunlight, having to turn the light on at 1 in the afternoon. This little cove is full of weird stuff. Example, three of the rooms have caved it with old concrete, but we still go in there for stuff. Also, it's getting sort of crowded with two pregnant girls.

Yes

I said two.

It turns out that Hoffman's sperm are good on their first trip. We didn't even need a test, Amy just started throwing up and getting bigger. We'll both be going into labour soon, I hope it's not down here.

I sit in front of the mirror and sigh. My hair is waist length now and I'm running out of clothes, last week I had to wear an old SHEET when my top burst. I scrape my hair back into a messy ponytail to see if I look better without it all over the place. It doesn't help. I wasn't much of a looker before but now I just look fat and heavy.

I blink fast to get rid of the tears and waddle into the living room where Amy is flopped on the couch rubbing her baby bump. Well at least I'm not the only one suffering.

'Had breakfast yet?' she asks, trying to get up in spite of her lump. We think it's twins, she's much bigger than I am.

'I'll do it' I say 'I'm up anyway'

I walk over to the oven and start cooking bacon. This is a risky move for me seeing as lately I've had the craving for raw meat, but I manage.

'So what are you calling yours then?' calls Amy

'Alex' I call back 'you?'

'I don't know. I thought about Keith or Damen but they sound too….gay'

I grin. If that baby is anything like Amy, heavens help us.

'hey fatties!' yells Hoffman, bursting in but-ass naked. Lately he's decided that seeing as how he's the only guy here not having sex, he's going to torture Amy for leaving him.

'HEY!' she yells, jumping up 'get away from me!'

he stands in the middle of the room and pulls a pose. I sneer and look him up and down.

'I've seen bigger' I sigh, turning back to the bacon. Hoffman storms back into the bathroom. Me and Amy look at each other and laugh, whenever he's like this, being his ex really comes in handy.

Yep.

Things are almost perfect.

'_**AMY! KAT JADE!'**_

I waddle as fast as I can to Jigsaw's door, and fling it open. Kat is standing there wearing a towel and Jigsaw is simply wearing boxers –nice body for 52- staring at the ceiling. A huge crack is running through it.

'oh my god' I whisper 'how?'

Jigsaw stares at me

'we woke up, and it was there. I…' he sighs. For the first time ever, I see fear in Jigsaw's eyes. 'I think they're coming for us'

I feel dizzy.

Now?

NOW?

A sudden crashing noise fills the Cove, the ground begins to shake and I collapse to the ground, shielding my stomach. The shaking stops.

'Kat…' I murmur, shaken my the noise. I look up to see Kat helping Amy to her feet, while Jigsaw is nowhere to be seen. The crack in the ceiling is bigger. Much, much bigger. I get up and peer around the door.

'JADE! Get in here now!' Yells Jigsaw from out of sight. I step into the living room, Jigsaw is rushing around, bolting all the doors except one door at the back. One I've never been in. Hoff and Alex are on the couch, hastily getting dressed. Amy and Kat join me, and in an instant Jigsaw's room is bolted too.

'we need to get out of here.' He pants, grabbing a bucket and a large heavy bad from under the sink. Cement.

'this will hold them off for a little while' Jigsaw mixes the cement and spreads it on the doors, once again, all but the unbolted one.

'jigsaw' I say silently 'what's going on?'

he stops in mid spread and looks at me.

'Ok. The FBI are clearly doing this slowly, so they don't make this place cave in. they want us alive. But I've known for a while that they might charge while we were still there, so I've kept a tunnel spare to get us out of here. It's a much faster route to the surface, but it's much closer to the warehouse. So here's the plan. We run up the passageway out to the back of the warehouse, there's a wood right behind it, we go through the woods to the highway. I have a friend of mine waiting there with a car for us. It's fast enough to get us away, but normal enough that we won't be seen. We'll lose them fast enough.'

He's thought of everything.

I love him.

I really-

My thoughts are interrupted by an ear crunching crash, followed by voices.

'DAMN! What a dump! Lets just get them out of here.'

We freeze

'shut up lady-boy! Shit! This doors cemented shut. I told that fat-ass we should have been quiet'

they're here.

Already.

'GO!' yells jigsaw, flinging the passageway door open. FS and Amy are in first, then Hoff. Jigsaw gets behind me.

'go Jade, I'm right behind you.'

I grin and take a step forward….

And a huge wash of liquid drenches my legs.

Ew.

Another wash goes over my legs.

Wow. Weak bladder.

I know I'm scared but I'm not that-

Oh no.

'uh, Jade?' says Amy 'did you need the bathroom?'

I moan

'chill kid' laughs Hoffman 'maybe big girl undies were a step too far. We can ge diapers when were out of here.'

'shit' I whisper

'I think it's cute' says Kat

I look up at them

'my water just broke'

another wash goes over my legs. This time it IS pee.


	19. Chapter 19

**Disclaimer: I think I've established I don't own saw, do I really have to do this?**

We all stand in the doorway to the escape, frozen. Jigsaw is still holding a bucket of cement, Amy and Kat are still in their PJ'S looking terrified, and my legs are still being drenched. By what I don't know. Perhaps that's good. It's like in that movie I saw where the whole world blacked out. No movement, and no sound except for the sound of the agents trying to break in. then we all snap into action, like someone hits the fast forward button. Amy, Kat and Hoffman all bolt into the passage, urging me, FS and Jigsaw forward. Despite my now emptying gut, I run forward towards the dark tunnel. Jigsaw follows, and then we all whirl around to see fruit shoot standing in the living room.

'Alex!' I yell, they're nearly through the door now 'come on!'

He shakes his head.

'What are you doing!'

He steps forward and puts his hands on my cheeks. His eyes are full of tears.

'There's no time' he whispers 'even if we all run now, we won't get away fast enough. We need to hold them off for as long as possible. Go on without me.'

Tears form in my eyes.

'No…' I whisper.

He nods.

The door crashes to the ground, causing a large cloud of dust and stone to form. We hear the FBI people yelling.

'We know you're in here!'

'Come out with your hands up!'

But they're at a disadvantage, they're blind. We're not.

'GO!' yells Alex, pushing me and Jigsaw through the door. He slams it hard. Before I can grab it, Jigsaw has the door bolted. I scream.

'NO! NO YOU CAN'T! NOT HIM!'

I kick him in the shin and grab desperately at the bolt, but I feel hands grab me…pulling me up the stairs, covering my mouth.

'I'm sorry' says Jigsaw 'but we can't help him now.'

As I run up the stairs, I listen intently. I can hear Alex's voice.

'Come on boys, let's play tag. You're it'

Then

The most awful sound.

Seven loud gunshots, all together.

I can hear them hit him.

I can hear his blood pouring onto the floor.

Alex is gone.

With tears streaming down my face I streak up the stairs, following the others. My clothes are damp and dripping and I worry that they will follow the water and find us, but I can't focus on that now. My mind is a blur of people and places, I can feel my head getting lighter….good, no heavy head to carry….

Thump.

I fall down

Here

Jade fall down.

'woah! Guys, she's down' I hear them all gasp and crowd around me, acting worried.

I open my eyes to see Amy staring down at me. She hauls me up and hands me a bottle of water. I look up at her.

'uh…considering what's just happened' I say, gesturing at my wet legs 'do you really think that's a good idea?'

Jigsaw grins

'I think that was just a spur of the moment dear.'

I take a swig of water, holding my breath and praying. Nothing happens. I get up and start running again, still holding the bottle of water. The others all catch up and we return to our formation; me running slow and them jogging around me. I think we're going to be OK now, we're reaching the top now. Yep, I think-

'OH GOD!' I screech, doubling over in pain. We stop. The contractions have started.

'Its ok babe' whisper's Kat 'breathe through it' the pain stops. We carry on, up and up the steps. More contractions follow but I don't stop, we need to get out, we need to get out….

I'm bathed in light as the door opens. I blink. It shouldn't be this light…we sleep during the day, it's midnight. Then I realise why it's so light. I hear helicopters and sirens and people yelling.

They've got us.

Slowly, we all trail out of the door into the bright florescent lights. In a moment, Kat Amy and the rest are in hand cuffs. Then I'm surrounded my huge men, advancing on me. I step backwards until my back is against the warehouse wall. They have me cornered.

I can't believe it.

I'm caught.

The water I drank earlier has effected the labour, another wash of liquid drenches my legs. I don't know what it is anymore. The men laugh as they see my damp legs.

'HA!'

'WHAT A WIMP!'

'HOW CUTE!'

'ICKLE BABY'

'WANNA GO HOME?'

'WAH! WAH!'

then another voice, one I recognise. But I don't want to.

Amanda steps through the crowd of jeering men and looks me up and down. she laughs.

'Hello baby' she snorts 'I can see someone's wanting to run away. Is it because all her little buddies are?' she looks to the other's, who are all on their knees on the ground 'or because she had an accident?' she gestures at my legs 'or…' she looks at my gut 'because a little someone's coming out to say hello?'

I scowl.

I begin to get the feeling I got the day I saw myself on the news.

The day I hit my own reflection.

The day me and Hoffman made a huge mistake.

Too angry to cry.

'well, guess what Mandy' I say coldly 'you're more a baby than I am'

'what?' she laughs 'I'm not the one who hasn't figured out how to use a bathroom'

'yep' I say 'but you ARE throwing a big tantrum because you didn't get what you wanted'

she freezes

'what?' she whisper's

'well it's pretty obvious' I laugh 'you let me be live, you took care of me, but he moment I sleep with HIM' I gesture to Hoff ' you run away? Face it Amanda, you love him'

'shut up'

'you love him'

'I DON'T!'

'you couldn't have him so you decided to take out the person he chose over you!'

'NO!'

'we'll guess what, you can have him! Because he treated me like shit! He cheated, he lied, he got me pregnant! I love someone else Amanda. And your little buddies here killed him dead.'

Amanda swallows.

'look' she shiver's 'I, will let you and your baby live, if you join me'

What?

WHAT?

'you heard me' she continues ' you're right Jade. I love him. And now, he's not likely to have me. So here's the deal. You join me, we raise your baby, it grows up with half a family and we send these traitors to the chair'

Amy bursts into tears, trying to shield her stomach.

I know just how she feels.

'and if I say no?' I ask

she sighs

'you die too. And your baby'

no.

NO

She will not win. I didn't come this far to betray my friends. Now it's time to use my lying skill in another way. And this time I won't cry.

I step towards Amanda and hold my arms open

'NO!' screams Kat

'JADE, think of my baby, little Keith!'

I hug Amanda tight and slip my hand down to her belt. I feel her gun. I get a firm grasp and whisper in Amanda's ear.

'you know what Amanda?'

'what?' she laughs

I grin

'labour sucks'

then, right on Queue, all the water I've drank today kicks in, in one final gush. It drenches Amanda's whole bottom half. She screams and pulls away, I keep my hand wrapped around her gun so that it comes out in my hand. I look at her and star yelling.

'AMANDA! That, is just SO disgusting!'

as I guessed, the tall FBI guys surround her in a wave of jokes and laughing. I dart over to the other's, and begin to pick the locks on their handcuffs. They're free. I usher them into the woods, not waiting for thank-you's but as I turn to follow I hear Amanda yell

'she's getting away!'

the men turn to face me, all pulling out heavy rifles.

Don't look suspicious

Don't look suspicious

Don't look suspicious

Run

I dash into the wood, tripping over branches and nettles. I hear them shouting

'open fire open fire'

followed by heavy gunshot's I feel a few bullets fly past me but none of them hit. I turn around and fire back, hoping for a clear hit.

'JADE!' I turn to see Jigsaw and the other's waiting. I hear the cars rushing by. We're nearly at the highway. We've made it.

I laugh and join them. I can't even hear the gun's anymore. I turn to Jigsaw

'hey Jigsaw, where are we gonna liv-'

a blinding pain fills my back and I plummet to the ground.

'JADE!' screams Amy

'she's been shot!' yells Hoffman

they all surround me. I look up into their faces one last time, and by vision begins to fade.

I look to the edge of the forest and know I will never reach it.

I look at my stomach and realise my baby will never live.


	20. Chapter 20

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

**Jigsaw's point of view.**

We all see her fall.

We all hear the bullet sink into her skin

But only she feels it.

And we all know she will never get up

Dead on impact

She hits the ground with a thump, landing on her stomach. The gun slips from her hand and rolls across the grass. We hear Amanda cheering.

'YES! I got her, I got her!'

Hoffman darts forward, tears in his eyes

'AMANDA! YOU BITCH. YOU BITCH, COME BACK HER AND FACE ME YOU CUNT!' Kat secures him on the ground. It takes a moment, but in the end he just lies there and sobs. Amy sits on the ground and bends over the body of her best friend and bursts into tears, burying her head in her hair. Kat releases Hoffman and joins her in weeping. I crouch down next to her sad, lifeless face. She's still smiling, her eyes open but not seeing. Gently, I close her eyes.

'go to the car' I whisper to my weeping friends…and Hoffman.

'b-but' stammer's Kat, barely able to control herself.

'Kat' I interrupt 'we can't help her now'

reluctantly, they all trail to the edge of the wood. I see the car door open and watch then climb in. it sits there, waiting. Waiting for me. I look down at the Daughter I never had, and sigh.

'You would have made a great mother' I kiss her on the head. Then I stand and begin to walk slowly to the car. I can see Kat and Amy howling hard, and Hoffman burying his head in his hands. I think he regrets the way he treated her. Anyone would. He deserves another chance-

'Jigsaw….'

I whirl around to see her eyes wide open, her mouth trying to speak.

She's ALIVE

I rush over and sit her up. She tries to straighten up but I think the bullet hit her spine. She flops once again to the floor.

'Jigsaw' she murmurs again

'I know sweetheart' I whisper 'we'll get you out OK , we got you fixed once we'll-'

with difficulty she puts a finger to my lips.

'sh.'

Blood trickles out of her mouth and onto her hair. She opens her hand. In the moonlight I see a glint of silver. Part of the knife. The knife from the first time we met. The knife I tried to make her….

'oh my god…' I shudder.

Carefully, Jade puts the knife in my hand. She blinks, and to my horror, blood trickles from her eyes.

'c-cut it out…please. Save it…'

I nod

'jigsaw' she whispers. I have to listen hard, her voice is dying with her 'y-you can change the world…never stop t-trying-'

I nod again. Then, with a deep breath, I press the knife into her stomach.

I make a long line all across it, then go across again. I slowly move the folds of her skin away.

Then I cut again.

I see feet, I push the muscles and veins away, to see a pair of little pink legs. I hold them gently and pull.

A little tummy

2 little arms

and one, beautiful little face with long, jet black hair.

It's a girl.

I cradle her in my hands…a whole month early and yet so beautiful. I kiss her gently.

And the mouth opens…..but no sound comes out. Instead, one of her little pink hands grabs my finger. So tight, so strong.

So perfect

She looks up at me, and even in the dark I can see her eyes.

The most rich green there is.

More than emerald

Jade

I get the knife, and carefully snip the placenta off. Then I tie a little knot and push it in. it's done. I saved her. Just like jade wanted.

I look at her.

And she looks at me.

I pick up the gun.

And put it against her chest.

She nods

I pull the trigger.

Before I have a chance to think about it, I dart across the grass to the car and fling the door open. I sit down with the baby in my arms.

'dude' blurts the driver 'whose the-'

'drive' I interrupt

the car pulls away, and I turn to face my friends. They're all staring at me, and the baby. I sigh.

'she was still alive. She was dying. She asked me to cut her out. So I did. I knew she was going to suffer so I put her out of her misery so shut up.'

Kat puts her hand on mine.

'let us see her'

I pass the tiny baby to her. Kat reaches under the seat and pulls out a blanket. She wraps up the baby and kisses her forehead.

'hey little baby kid' she whispers, more tears spilling down her face. She passes her to Amy. Amy Kisses her and murmurs something in Italian. Then she translates

'it means, child of the damned.' She murmurs 'By the way, she wanted her to be named Alex. Alexus'

Then she passes the baby on

To Hoffman.

He holds the baby in his arms, not speaking. He just holds her to his chest, and sobs.

I look out of the window.

I think of Jade

She could have lived

She could have seen her baby

But she chose us

She was truly a hero.

Jade

Born free. She was like a lioness, ruler of it's pride.

Then, just as she was in her prime of life, she was caged and forced to obey the world's rules.

And the world destroyed her.

Her body is left to rot in the woods.

I shudder at the thought of her lying there, with all the birds and bugs…

Jade.

Trapped.

Forever.

I lean my head against the window, and for the first time in years, I cry.

**Fear not! For this is not the end my fellow peples!**


	21. Chapter 21

Disclaimer: I own nothing. NOTHING. How depressing...

**Note from I'm very tired; I'm letting saw maniac write this one for all her help in trapped. Enjoy! **

**Hoffman POV**

Alexus,

You know when you do something that really hurts someone you really care about, and then keep putting off saying 'sorry' 'cos 'sorry' just doesn't sound like it's enough?

I'm not trying to defend what I did all that time ago to your mother; I cared about both of them, both her and Amy (if she ever comes back, I'll introduce you two).

The only difference was this: I loved Amy for who she was, and I loved Jade for just..._being_. I guess what I'm trying to say is that it felt more...right to love Jade than Amy.

Pretty bad excuse, huh? For not telling her, I mean. I guess this does make what Kat said about me true: I am a coward. It looks even worse down on paper than it did in my mind...

You have no idea how much it hurt to watch your mother die. When I tried to explain myself in the 'Grand Inquisition' afterwards, Uncle John basically told me – actual words, no chance of him ever, _ever_ dampening things down, as you probably already know – that it would've hurt less if I'd not wronged her so badly in the first place. Which is probably true.

There was...shit, there was so much fucking blood. The last thing I actually remember was Amanda cheering, and then I completely lost it. I think the main plan was to grab the gun your mo – no, I've got to stop calling her that ('sides, she'd probably have tried to kill me) – _Jade_ had dropped when she'd been killed and shoot the whole fucking magazine of bullets at her. I must've screamed something at her, though – she turned and saw me and the look on her face...I don't think she ever stopped loving me, even after I'd ended it. Love and me haven't exactly gone well together for the last God-know-how-many years.

Anyway, before I'd even got to the gun, someone had jumped on me and pinned me down. I didn't put up much of a fight; when I couldn't move anymore it gave me the chance to completely break down – which I was scared of – and I did.

Next thing I know, I was being bundled into a car and we were driving God-knows-where. Not that I was particularly bothered, after...everything.

And then someone – I never found out who all these someones where by the way; they hate me and I don't blame them and they're probably still blanking me up 'till now – passed me you.

Of course, you cried at birth – I wasn't there, as always – but you weren't crying then. Your eyes were the deepest green – Jade green – and I remember thinking ironically that it was the baby that was meant to be doing all the crying, not the father.

But I couldn't put you down.

Not even when Amy waddled into my new room of our new hideout with the few things she had managed to grab before the FBI came and said that she was leaving. She didn't look me in the eyes when she said she didn't want anything to do with me, after...everything. Ok, fine, after I cheated on your mo – JADE – and made Amy pregnant as well. (There, now that's out on paper...) I didn't say a thing; I just watched her leave.

I'm not sure why I was so stubborn over putting you down...wait, that's a lie; somehow it felt like you were holding my chest together and I could still breathe while you were there. I was very depressed at the time – not that anyone was particularly bothered, but hey, why should they be? But in the end Kat – that's your Aunty Kitkat, by the way – snapped at me that to move on, I had to let you go.

And that's why I'm writing this. My new main plan is this: I'm going to raise you up and love you and not let anyone hurt you ever. In your teenage years you'll probably have Jade's fighting spirit and sarcasm and we'll have so many arguments that the doors will be hanging off the hinges with the amount of slamming – but we'll always make up again.

In your toddler years you're probably going to irritate the crap out of me – for when you chuck your baby food shit all over me – and scare it out of me too – when you wander off in the department store and I end up finding you in the sweet section innocently eating all the Pick 'N Mix. But throughout you're going to have a smile that really lights up the world around you, and a family that really cares about what happens to you.

But you're going to need to know the truth, and so I promise you this: when you turn eighteen and start planning for art college/university/supermarket job or whatever, I'll give you this. By that time, you'll be adult enough to make your own choices in life – and won't have to have it grilled into you by Uncle John – and whatever decision you make about me and all that's happened I won't blame you.

You may choose to forgive me – I'm hoping that you do – or you may choose to treat me like the scumbag everyone else thinks – knows – I am and leave for good.

And after holding on to you for all these years, for us both to heal I'll have to let you go.

Your loving father,

Mark Hoffman

19/5/2010

**Inspirational Song Lyrics**

_Sitting there singing this song like _

_You never know what you've got 'til it's gone like damn..._** – Chipmunk**

_And I'm all mixed up, feeling cornered and rushed  
They say it's my fault but I want her so much  
Wanna fly her away where the sun and rain  
Come in over my face, wash away all the shame..._

_I can try to pretend, I can try to forget  
But it's driving me mad..._ _All the things she said..._ _Running through my head_** – T.A.T.U**

_When I wanted to call you  
And ask you for help_

_I stopped myself..._

_When I wanted to tell you  
I made a mistake  
I walked away..._

_Gomennasai _**(sorry)**___for everything  
Gomennasai, I know I let you down..._

_Gomennasai, Gomennasai,  
I never needed a friend,  
Like I do now_** – T.A.T.U**

_This is a tear, just a remnant of the past,  
__Dont je m'éloigne,mais qui ne cesse de me hanter,__Which I leave, but continues to haunt me,  
__Ce n'est qu'une larme, qui entaille mes pensées,__This is a tear, which cut my thoughts,  
__Je retrouve mon âme ton regard me donne envie d'avancer,__I found my soul your eyes makes me want to move forward  
__Eh eh oh oh Laisse moi l'oublier__Eh eh oh oh let me forget  
__Eh eh oh oh Laisse moi l'effacer__Eh eh oh oh Let me clear  
__Eh eh oh oh Pour mieux tout te donner ...__Eh eh oh oh To better give you everything ... __Ref :__  
__J'aimerai tellement te dire ce que veut mon coeur,__I would really like to tell you what my heart wants,  
__Mais je n'ai plus les mots,__But I have no words,  
__J'aimerai tellement te dire que je n'ai plus peur,__I would really like to tell you that I'm not afraid, _

_Mais ces mots sonnent faux__But these words do not ring true  
__Je dois tout recommencer une nouvelle fois,__I have to start over again..._

_You know I would really like to tell you what my heart wants,__  
__Mais je n'ai plus les mots,__But I have no more words_** – Jena Lee (French)**

_Now Cinderella don't you fall asleep_

_It's such a bitter form of refuge..._

_Now with the dreams I'll hide_ **– The Killers**

**Hope you enjoyed! Stay tuned for ze sequal...lets all hope for muffins *looks pointedly at im very tired...***


	22. Chapter 22

**Disclaimer: I own nothing****, **

**I TOLD U ID BE BACK!**

16 years later…

I slip out of bed and pull on my robe. He rolls over lazily and snores, his huge fatty stomach rippling as he inhales. I hope that was worth it. Jade would NEVER have let this happen to me. That's what's wrong with all this, she isn't alive to enforce her own dying wish. After she died, Hoffman-my dad- cried for days. Him, uncle John -Jigsaw-, and Kat all escaped to Miami. They struggled to find work and feed me because everyone had heard about what happened in Manhattan. They were all hurt deeply.

But I don't care about that.

I think what was hurt most was Jigsaw's pride.

',lil Jiggy' they called him. They broke into the bunker and found baby stuff. They found more in the apartment. Then they got the puppet and….

I shudder

Dressed it up in all the baby stuff that they'd found. Then they put it on the news. I hate that kind of thing, I hate how whenever someone shows any kind of weakness, people take advantage. The worst part is that we can't get any REAL revenge. We can't find anybody worth testing. So, we stick with the fat cunts who need a shag, charge them for materials, then kill them. And they don't even try anyway, the just opt for the quick way and die. I hate to say it but, I think things are going to end soon.

'Hey baby' snorts…whoever. 'Want another go?'

I stand, trying not to gag.

'One per customer. Now get out'

He drops a wad of cash onto the desk and walks out. I shiver again and walk into the bathroom for a shower. I glance at the schedule on my nightstand, I have one more client today. I don't look at the rest of the sheet. It doesn't matter, we only have stuff like the address in case one of us has an STD but that never happens so I don't bother. I have my shower and walk back into the bedroom to see a young boy sitting on the bed. Well, I say young but he can't be much older than me really. But what's he doing here?

'Uh…' I start, but he interrupts me

'Look, this is my first time and I'm a little embarrassed…so uh…be….gentle'

I look him up and down. Not a bad looking guy, short spiky black hair, sort of sea-sky blue eyes, he's just wearing a plain black T-shirt but I can tell by the way it hangs off of him that he's got muscles. And, for some strange reason he's smiling at me. The last client that smiled at me…..

I rub the jagged scar on my neck where he stabbed me.

'Okay.' I sigh, removing my robe 'Its 5oo bucks per turn'

He grins and removes his shirt –I was right about the abs – and his pants, then he slips under the covers and stretches. Okay, so this guy's a little more sweet and tasty than the rest, I still have a job to do, and Jigsaw and Hoff'll just give me grief if I don't.

I slip under the covers next to him and start my part, I lean in and…..he kisses me. Hm. Most of my clients aren't this soft. I kiss him back, glad to have a client who's gentle, we do it again, and again until finally my timer goes off. End of the day. I haul myself off of his heaving chest and walk over to my desk and switch off the timer. I turn around to see him standing up, getting dressed. He looks like the Grinch stole his Christmas.

'Did I do something wrong?' I ask carelessly

He looks up

'No. no you didn't' he drops a wad of cash on my desk and grins

'So that's, 500 per turn is it?'

'Call it 10 for the price of one' I laugh

He grins and walks out.

I miss him.

It was good to have a client who wasn't all flab.

I get dressed and walk out of the office, with enough cash for at least 6 new traps.

But I don't know what horrible things are to come….


	23. Chapter 23

Disclaimer: I don't own Saw. SERIOUSLY, AFTER 22 CHAPTERS HAVE YOU GUYS NOT CAUGHT ON?

I toss and turn in my hot bed, trying to sleep. Why can't I stop thinking about him? OK, he kissed me, he smiled, he gave me a real experience, he was gentle, but that's not such a big deal. He's just a sissy in bed. I mean, I have sex me all the time, and I never care, so why do I do now? He looks familiar, but I don't know how. It's not a good kind of familiar. It's like when you recognise a gun pointing at your head. I give up on sleep and wander around my room. It's full of gory Horror movie posters, scream, Halloween, nightmare on Elm Street and…. Saw. How did that happen? I mean, not only did they make a movie about what we do, but they got people who look just like us. It's too confusing. I step out onto the hallway and wander into the kitchen. Hoffman is lying on the couch sipping coffee. He won't let me call him dad. I don't blame him; he has enough reasons to feel old as it is. I'm sure he looked great when he was young, but seriously, 41is too old to look good. He glances up at me. He doesn't meet my gaze. He never does nowadays.

'Hey kid' his voice is deep and crackly. 'We got another guy in a trap'

I don't react; he sees my unimpressed look and laughs

'I think you'll be happy with this one, he has a family, he has a job and he's only eighteen. I think this one might be the one that turns things around'

I sigh and pull on my jacket. I need to see this to believe it. I walk out onto the street and get into the car –I don't have a licence but I've learnt- and set off to our warehouse.

I unlock the doors and step into the camera room and breathe in it's far too familiar scent. Blood. Dried blood. It's almost comforting. I haven't been in here for SO long. I just haven't bothered because all of our players are so shit. But maybe Hoffman's right, maybe this time it will work.

I flick on the monitor.

A small figure lies on the floor, with a hard metal collar around their neck. Across the room are 5 glass boxes, with keys inside. Strange, this one seems too easy. Then I see that his legs and arms are bound too. Ah. Good old Jigsaw.

'Hello Max, I'd like to play a game,' booms the voice.

Wait.

Max?

I pull my old schedule out of my pocket and scan it. My eyes flicker to my last appointment.

'Max Young, age eighteen, drug abuser.' I stammer. I shudder as I realise who this is. This is the guy. The bed sissy. The….the one who I recognised.

I watch the screen, my heart in my mouth as he wakes up. A lump rises in my throat as I see his poor, battered face. His left eye is swollen shut, his nose is broken and bleeding. And the worst part of all, is his beautiful black hair. It's been shaved right off.

'W-what?' he gasps, struggling to stand under his heavy bonds.

The voice continues.

'Every day, you give people hope. You let orphaned and homeless kids feel like someone cares. And yet you STILL don't care enough to make the changes yourself. Well now you will see how it feels to lose what they have. let the games begin'

He groans in pain and stands up, and immediately flattens himself against the wall, his head dangerously close to the large mounted razor. The screen in the corner of the room goes blank, and the 15 minute timer begins counting down.

No.

NO.

This can't happen

This WON'T happen.

I grab the Mic, and swallowing my pride, I speak.

'listen' the voice floods the room, I turn off the voice changer thingy and talk again 'I can get you out of here'

His head shoots up, his jaw drooping.

'it's you' he whispers 'the-the prosti-'

'shut up' I interrupt. I hate that word 'look, I didn't do this to you. But I can get you out'

An angry look flashes across his face.

'and, why should I trust you?'

I sigh.

'Do you want a big rubber hand?'

He swallows

'Fine'

'all of the keys are the same' I say slowly 'you only need one to open all the locks.'

he nods, and takes a deep breath. Then he darts forward.

The 60 second timer starts.

All of his limbs are wrenched backwards, the hard metal rings digging into him. Blood trickles down his beautiful, smooth neck. I swallow. He has to make it.

45 seconds

He has to.

30 seconds

He smashes open a glass box and wrenches the key out. First he does his neck, then his legs.

15 seconds

his left arm

5 seconds

his right arm.

The buzzer sounds and all of the collars are pulled against the mounted razor.

He lays on the floor, very still, and very quiet. He got out on time, but he's in shock. The door opens and i walk through, into the room. I'm still in my PJ'S a little lingerie number. I wrap my jacket around me a little tighter. I crouch down next to him.

'are you OK?' i whisper

he nods

'why did you do it?' he murmurs

i sigh. This isn't the first time I've been blamed. When we put my other clients in here they usually scream stuff about me.

'i didn't' i stammer 'my grandpa did'

his eyes flicker to mine. His mouth hangs open.

I sigh again.

'he is the man you call jigsaw'

'SHUT UP!' i whisper, as we slip into my room 'they'll hear you!'

he's falling around laughing, holding his sides.

'I-I can believe it! All this time i thought Jigsaw was loosing his touch, when instead where is he? BABYSITTING!'

i glare at him. He snorts

'well i think it's cute.'

i shove him down onto the bed.

'look, how long are you staying? I got a busy day ahead.'

'dunno.' he sighs 'my Mom just went crazy, she started screaming about how she wanted a girl, then she took a knife out and...'

he buries his head in his hands

'look, I'll be gone once i get a place. I'll be out of your hair soon.'

the doorbell rings.

'hang on.' i say

i walk out into the hall. Jigsaw is flopped in the the armchair. The tumor's

back. He's STILL resisting Chemo.

I open the door to see a tall, brown haired woman with a nose stud, not unlike my own. At her side is a short spiky haired girl with a snobby look about her.

'OH!Says the tall woman 'I...didn't expect to see...is Hoffman here?'

i hear a loud gasp from behind me.

'AMY?'

i whirl to see Hoffman standing behind me, his mouth hanging open.

'A-Alex' he stammers 't-this is Amy Price. 'And this' he points to the kid 'if i'm not mistaken, is her daughter...your sister'

what?

'you're not mistaken' whispers Amy.

WHAT?


	24. Chapter 24

Disclaimer: I own nothing

I glare at Hoffman from the couch. He's sitting down with the little blonde kid, explaining what's going on. HM. I don't remember EVER getting that kind of treatment, all I got was a sob story written on a placemat. I turn my gaze to Amy. She's sitting on the kitchen unit talking to Jigsaw and Kat. They're grinning their fucking heads off, offering her coffee and cake and…..

I finger the knife in my pocket. I wish I could bury it in her freckled fucking face. Nobody's paying any attention to me. Nobody's noticing the fact that about 20 minutes ago a black haired boy ran across the hall to use the bathroom. No. they're all happy without my company. Well, not like me to hang out where I'm not wanted. I stalk back into my room and slam the door. Hard. I wait for Kat to yell to not slam the door. But she doesn't. Oh no. She's happy with her friend and her niece, never mind the kid who fucking helps keep her here. I throw myself down onto the bed. What a day. I've got a sexy drug abuser hidden in my room, a freaky half sister in the living room and 4 murderers having a reunion. Wow. If this were a T.V show it'd be awesome. But its not. So it sucks.

'A-Alex….'

Huh?

'H-H-Help me….'

I flick my light on and gasp.

Max is lying on the floor, gasping for air. His eyes are huge and his pupils are dilated. I've seen this before.

He's having an asthma attack.

'SHIT!' I whisper, getting down next to him, 'Do you have a pump?'

He shakes his head. I begin to rub his chest and whisper to him.

'Calm down, just calm down…..' Slowly, his breathing slows down and he relaxes. We both sigh in relief as he lets out a loud burp. He sits up.

'Thanks' he gasps, holding his chest.

'Welcome' I say silently. 'Why didn't you tell me you were asthmatic?' He looks away

'Only losers have asthma.'

'THEY DON'T'!' I gasp 'Kat has it, and she's doing Jigsaw!'

He winces as I say his name.

'Sorry. I'm my mom's son. Even though I don't want to be. She always got mad when I had an attack. Then, when I was done, she'd hit me over the head and tell me I was faking the whole thing. She didn't even buy me a pump.'

'Oh,' I whisper.

Slowly, I put my hand on his and brush his floppy black hair out of his face. His eyes are watery as he looks into mine. And he reaches up to my face, and pushes mine back behind my ears. He smiles.

'your roots are showing'

I blush. They dyed it red when I was old enough to. Apparently, someone saw them running off with a little black haired baby. I glance to Max's shirt. It's ripped open, showing his hard abs.

'your shirt-' I say huskily

'it ripped when I fell' he sighs

I feel a stab of guilt when I realise I could have stopped that.

'Don't' I whisper 'Don't make me feel guilty'

A strand of bright red hair falls in front of my face. He brushes it away. He strokes my cheek, and leans in. I feel his soft lips brush mine, and turn sideways. I feel his warm tongue enter my mouth and entwine with mine, it's like they're doing a dance, twisting and turning around. I can't even tell whose mouth they're in. his hand slides down my waist, and begins undoing my shorts…

'Alex?' calls Jigsaw, knocking at the door. I pull away and shove Max into the closet. I quickly zip up my shorts and flop onto the bed.

'Come in'

Jigsaw comes in; Kat is behind him looking slightly uncomfortable. They sit down on the bed next to me. Jigsaw sighs.

'I'm sorry. Nobody seems to notice how hard his is on you Alex. I want you to know that just because Amy and Joy are here doesn't mean that you're less important'

I don't react. I don't want his pity. I don't care about Joy or Amy; I care about my dad being such a prick. I don't love him anymore. I don't love anybody anymore.

'We, we have some news' says Kat quietly, moving closer. She takes my hand and places it on her stomach. It's so faint, but I feel a tiny little thump.

Oh my fucking god.

A large smile spreads across Kat's face.

'I'm only a few weeks in. but it's growing really fast.' A small frown appears 'I only wish I wasn't so old'

'Come on darling. Let's leave her' says Jigsaw, getting up.

As they leave, I think about the stories that Jigsaw and Hoffman told me about their earlier life. They danced, the went to parties, they woke up hung-over next to people they didn't even know….

And then they met Jade.

They all got caught up in Jigsaw's games, they had to run from the F.B.I, and then when my Mom died, they got stuck with a baby.

As far as they're concerned, life ended at 14.

Max slips out of the closet and sits on the bed next to me. He put his freezing hand on my forehead and strokes it.

'That was intense' he whispers 'Jigsaw's gonna be one strict dad. But they're right you know, you're probably the most important person in this whole house.'

I sigh

'A house where I'm probably never going to see the same way again'

He puts his other hand on my cheek

'you've still got me….if you want me'

I nod. He grins.

'So this is it? I'm dating Jigsaw's granddaughter?'

'stranger things have happened' I murmur.

As I go into kiss him, my mind shoots into all things stranger than this

Teaching people lessons through torture

Walking out on a serial killer while 8 months pregnant

Giving up you're life for a girl you just met, even though she's pregnant with another guy's baby

Cheating on your pregnant girl

Going out with a 58 year old

Going to school even though you cant even read….

It's weirs, I've never thought about my Mom's life before now. I blame Amy.

No matter what, she's gotta go.


	25. Chapter 25

+Disclaimer: I own nothing.

I run my hand across his muscular chest and run my lips over his gut. He kisses me on the small of my back, and continues down.

'Again' I giggle as he moves down.

'5 times' he whispers 'you're dehydrated.'

'And? You're a criminal'

I wrap my legs around his waist and sit up on top of him. I've never thought that a guy's…. 'Thing' looked so good, but his looks PERFECT. I kiss him again.

'ok, if you insist on sex starvation we should go get some breakfast.'

'cool'

I check my alarm clock, 6 AM. I pull on my thin black robe, and scoop my hair back into a ponytail. Max slips into my old fuzzy slippers and trackies. I giggle and open the door.

'hey Kid' smiles Hoffman, pouring himself some coffee. I hastily shove Max back in and shut the door. Amy is sat next to him, a broad smile on her face. Hoffman's hair is messy, and the trash can is suspiciously empty. Great. Old people sex.

'What?' asks Hoffman innocently, he smoothes his hair down and adjusts his jacket. I glare harder.

'who were you talking to?' asks Amy, noticing that I've not moved and Hoffman had stopped eating his muffin.

'get out' I whisper then I scream it. 'GET OUT!'

They stare at me in horror, Hoffman gets up and comes over to me.

'Alex' he sighs 'Amy has nowhere to go. She has a kid and-'

My hand flies across his fat face, and he shoots back. I hear a horrified gasp from behind me. Clearly Max isn't used to my kind of violence. I stare up into my dads eyes. He's fuming.

'How, Dare, You'

I glare up at him.

' how, DARE you lay a hand after everything I've done for you!'

All he's done for ME?

'all you did.' I say, trying not to screech 'IS FUCKING PIMP ME OUT!'

Amy gasps. Ha. Looks like she wasn't told about my part time job. I decide to enlighten her tiny brain.

'See, after my mom got a bullet in her chest' I say, chattily. Waltzing around the room 'This flabber faced fucker's been a little short of cash…and victims for his little games. So, who's the 16 year old girl. Who started this whole shag-fest at THIRTEEN that can use her body, to satisfy both needs?'

Hoffman is staring at me. His eyes are dark and angry. Thankfully I know how to make HIM feel cheap, make HIM want to throw up.

'the last thing Jade ever wanted, was for me to be safe, healthy and happy. I'm none of those things. You didn't love her'

'I DID!' cries Hoffman

'Then why?' I yell, grabbing the letter off the table 'DID YOU CHEAT ON HER WITH THIS FAT WHORE?'

'DON'T YOU DARE CALL-'

'DON'T YOU DARE TO STOP ME!' I scream.

Hoffman takes a big step forward. His fist is clenched.

'go to your room'

'no'

'NOW'

'blow it out your-'

Pain explodes from my cheek and I fall to the floor. A trickle of blood leaks from my ear.

'Hoff! Don't!' it's Amy, I look up to see her trying to pull him away. He shoves her off and advances on me.

'I tried to forgive myself. But EVERY time I do you make some stupid little smartass remark. Apologise'

I lie there, staring up at him. I feel the apology rise in my throat, but shove it back down. I will NOT grovel.

'APOLOGISE' he demands again.

There's a long silence, then a tiny little voice breaks in.

'Alex. PLEASE. Just apologise' it's Amy, she's crying.

'why?' I murmur 'then you can have him all to your self.'

Hoffman's hand comes down hard on my back. He goes for the kitchen drawer, and pulls out something. I can't see it from where I'm lying and I don't dare turn.

I've never seen my dad like this, even when we've talked about mom before. He always loves to talk about her. then again, nobody in this whole house would badmouth her except me.

'HOFFMAN NO!'

I snap out of thought.

I look up. A huge flash of silver.

Sterling silver.

A knife.

I hold my breath and wait.

'you' he growls 'have been screwing me over for 16 years.'

'no' I whisper ' You let me'

The knife comes down.

'NO!'

Hoffman falls to the ground, the knife rolls across the carpet and he begins to wrestle.

Hm. Never thought that little Joy kid had it in her. Poor kid not even developed, though she has some massive-

Six pack.

Max.

MAX.

I run over and rip Max away, his nose is bloody and his eye is bruised. I kiss him hard on the lips.

'you IDIOT. You blew your cover.'

'who cares.' He laughs 'your dad will have to put up with me wont he?'

'who the FUCK are you?' growls Hoffman, standing up.

Max steps forward and holds out his hand.

'Max Young. You daughter helped me-'

Before he can finish, Hoffman has him pinned down on the floor.

'HOFF! What are you-' begins Amy

'JIGSAW! KAT! COME HERE, HURRY!'

'Hoff, what's going on?' Amy starts to cry.

'Amy' pant's Hoff 'he's Amanda's son'

Amy doesn't say anything else. Because she's already fainted.

Then I remember.

The psycho mother

The knife.

The last name.

Young.

I look down into Max's terrified eyes.

'you're mom killed mine' I say 'Amanda young.'

Horror strikes his face and tears spill down his cheeks.

I don't react. He's nothing to me now.

I head back into my room and lie on the bed. And for the first time in my life. I cry.


	26. Chapter 26

Disclaimer: I don't own saw.

Readers, please be honest with me. Am I losing my toutch?

I wake up with a pounding headache. Crying hurts, I wonder why people do it so much. I can hear Jigsaw's stern voice in the living room, Hoffman left at about 5 AM. I don't blame him, the very memory of Amanda's doing is scary.

Yes. I remember it.

I've never told anyone, but I can remember really far back. Like, when I started crawling it hurt my knees, and I bit the radiator and liked the taste. That's the farthest I can remember clearly. But sometimes, when I'm asleep, I have this dream.

It's like my worst nightmare.

I'm naked and wet, and at first I can't breathe or see. I can hear screaming and shouting but i don't understand it. Then it all the noise stops. Then a bright light blasts through and I feel cold hands grab and my legs. The I can see. It's blurry but I can make out a pair of huge watery eyes. The cold hands cradle me and I'm moved.

And then I see clearly.

Somebody's lying on the ground. They're covered in blood, their whole stomach is gone. My eyes wander up. I gag as I see their face. Pale and sweaty, with masses of long black hair. Blood drips down the face. I look up. Into a pair of bright green eyes.

I always wake up screaming.

I know who it is. It's my mom.

Kat always says that newborns can never remember their own birth, but is it possible that the memory is still in our head? It must be. Because when I sleep, I remember.

I shudder and get up. I wipe my eyes and stand up straight.

I want answers.

As I enter the living room, all eyes turn to me. Amy is sitting on the couch, rocking back and forth. Kat's in a similar position, standing by the window chanting something. Jades death really fucked them up.

Max is on the floor, stunned. I ignore him and walk overt to jigsaw, who is making coffee.

'what's the story?' I ask

'his dads some musician, left when he was just 5'

I stare down at him. He's sickening. His hair, his face his skin….it all reminds me of her. They showed me pictures of her. She's so HIDEOUS. I glare at his stomach muscles, so perfect. I can't believe just yesterday I was _**kissing them.**_

_**I was having the best night, we talked, we had sex, I let him do things I'm not allowed to charge for.**_

I walk over to him. He looks up.

'Alex I-' he starts

'Don't you dare. She talks. You shut up.'

I turn to see Hoffmans back. Drunk, but back. He nods at me. I continue.

'2 days ago, I let you out of a saw trap. I thought I was doing the world a favour. You were sweet, gentle, you were such a fantastic client I was sad when you left. Took you into my home, and kept you safe. I-I really liked you. Even more when you stopped Hoff from doing something stupid. But you DARE, to tell me you liked me.'

'I did-' he starts. My foot knocks him backwards, and his head smashes against the coffee table.

'you knew. You saw the news reports. They were on for a whole NINE YEARS. THE SEARCH NEVER ENDED, IT JUST DIED DOWN. Your mom was in most of them. "the woman who knew" was what they called her. The showed mom's pictures. They mentioned the baby. You knew. ADMIT IT.'

He sighs.

'yes. I knew. I just hoped that-'

'WHAT?' explodes Jigsaw 'That she'd forgive you?'

we stare at him. He's fuming

' we all, loved Jade. She was our sister' he gestures to Kat and amy 'our daughter and' he points to Hoffman 'our lover'

Kat walks over to him and Kisses him on the cheek. Tears stream down her face.

'you have no idea how hard it was to watch her die. To see the light, leave her eyes.'

Amy stands up and puts her arm round Kat

'Jade was my best friend. Nobody could take her away from me. Then your mom did just that'

I stare at them.

And I suddenly feel about 3 years old.

All the grown ups are talking about a lady I never knew, and I'm not allowed to join in.

Joy is sitting at the table, un-phased by all of this. I notice something in her ear. A hearing aid….oh.

She's deaf.

I guess this all sucks for her too. Her dad doesn't love her mom.

Poor kid.

The door bell rings.

Nobody moves

It rings again.

And again

And again.

In the end I cave in and go to answer it.

I open the door to see nobody's there. I step out. The door swings shut. Tutting, I go to open it…

'Hello Alex'

I spin around.

And throw up all over the porch. I sink to the ground, clutching my stomach.

It's Amanda.

Amanda young

AMANDA YOUNG

I try to scream. I try to run but I'm so unsteady that I fall to the ground

I'm bundled into the back of a van, and thrown against the walls as she does a j turn and speeds off. IIcan't believe it.

'wh-what are you DOING?' I yell, now realising what's going on.

'MY BABY, MY BABY!'

huh?

'MINE! MINE!'

I sink back against the metal doors.

She's gone crazy.


	27. Chapter 27

Disclaimer: I own nothing

Oh….my head.

I tried so hard to stay awake, but I felt so sick and so empty. I don't want to open my eyes. I have no idea what I'll see.

I'm right to be scared.

My eyes open to one of the worst sights ever. A dead rat. It's being dangled from what looks like an old coat hanger. I gag and roll over-

And my face squishes against bars. I sit up And gasp. I'm sitting in a weird bed. My OLD BED. I remember because I threw this massive tantrum when they took it away and hid on the roof for a day. It's bright blue, with red stars, and bars on the side to stop me from falling off. Well, IT WAS blue and red, now it's grey. I look around the room, and as it all comes into focus I feel a shock go down my spine.

I think it used to be a nursery, the walls are decorated with fairies and clown pictures. At one point they must have been all kinds of colours but now they are the same ghostly grey as the bed. The wallpaper has peeled away, showing stained walls. My eyes drift to the floor and I gasp. It's littered in teddy bears. It looks like chainsaw massacre for tots, as most of them are beheaded. A lonely jack in the box lies discarded on the floor, and once again, everything is gray.

I'm scared.

The door opens and a flood of light sweeps the room. The sudden brightness does not help the look of the room, but the rancid smell of the rat is at least hidden by the smell of pancakes.

'hello sweetie!'

Amanda bounds in; she's hearing a robe and slippers, carrying a plate of pancakes. She points to the rat.

'like the new mobile?'

I sit there, frozen in horror. She smiles.

'poor sweetie, look. PRETTY!'

She flicks the rat and a laughs as it swings around. She's doubling over. I take my chance and try to climb out of the bed…

'OH NO YOU DON'T!' she cries, and in an instant she put's her hands under my shoulders and picks me up. What the hell is she doing? She dumps me on a grey –previously pink- dresser. It's crawling with woodlice. I swallow. I don't want to be here. I stare as she starts eating the pancakes. I stare at her. She looks so fragile, and she doesn't look like she's slept in weeks. I take a chance.

'Why am I here?'

She looks up and grins.

'You live here sweetie. Oh, you must be so tired after those bad people kept us apart for so long. Don't worry; we'll be back to normal soon'

What?

What?

WHAT?

I stare at her, my heart is pounding. She's lost it, she really has. I stare at her. No gun, no means of attack. She doesn't look strong. I need to get out. NOW.

Without stopping to think I throw myself off of the dresser, it falls to the ground, splintering and throwing a wave of woodlice in Amanda's direction.

'NO!YOU'RE MINE!' she screeches in horror.

I wrench the door open, releasing another wave of woodlice. The walls are solid stone, and the floor is wood. I look down at myself.

She's WARPED.

_Rainbow dungarees _

I gag again and dart down the hall. The walls stop being boring stone and become horrifying.

They're covered in pictures of me. From babyhood right into last week. I start as I spot a mirror, thinking it's another picture. I spot the front door and dart for it.

Almost there.

Almost….

Oh god….

My gut is killing me…

OW.

I plummet to the ground, holding my stomach. It hurts so much… its like a black hole's swallowed it up. It hurts.

I hear Amanda coming closer, I don't move. Even if I do get out the front door I have no idea where I am. Her shadow casts over me. I look up, she's holding a belt. I wince as it slashes across my back, again and again.

5

10

15

20…..

It stops.

Then come the beatings.

She lays into me with a bat, over and over again. I don't scream as the pain explodes through my body. It's so hard not to burst into my second set of tears. But when I see the amount of blood I've lost, I cant hang on.

I screech.

'NO! NO! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?'

I look up to see another door. It's wood is splintered and rotten, and it's shaking as somebody tries to break through.

Amanda darts across the room and slams herself against the door. Then she grabs a tranquiliser and fires through a small hole. Then she turns back to me.

'you belong to me'

I stand up, gasping and gagging in pain. I look her straight in the eye.

'Hoffman is my DAD. Jigsaw's my grandpa. They watched Jade die at your hand. You don't own me'

She rips a framed photo of me from the wall and hurls it in my direction. It misses. Just.

'I OWN YOU! I loved Hoffman more than that tramp ever could! You, should have been MY BABY!'

She bursts into tears and sinks to the ground. I look at the door. I could escape. I really could. I walk over to the front door and open it. Then I look down at myself.

I look about six ears old. Then I look to Amanda. She looks around 50.

I close the door.

I can't leave.

If I leave now Amanda will come back, and won't stop till I stay.

Also, I have a shock collar on my leg.

I leave Amanda sobbing on the floor. As I trail back up the hall I feel tears prick in my eyes.

I don't want to be here.

Its creepy, I don't know where I am, the woman keeping here is totally cracked.

I open my bedroom door and crawl onto the tiny bed.

I think about my old life.

Hoffman.

Jigsaw.

Kat.

It was all so BORING.

They just didn't try anymore, then I met Max and I had some excitement. And now his moms kidnapped me.

I wanna go home.

I miss them

Things were just getting SO GOOD.

I curl up and sellep, wondering if they wonder where I am….


	28. Chapter 28

Disclaimer: you know I don't own it. (The A's mean it's later on)

Jigsaw's Point of view:

'Come on Alex call us' I whisper…

It's been hours, all the others are out looking for her. I have to stay home in case she calls or comes back.

I don't understand it. One second she was here, the next she was gone. No note, no evidence, just…gone.

Plus, we think she's sick because there was puke all over the porch.

I can't bear it.

The last thing I promised Jade was that I'd keep teaching people lessons, but instead I pimped out her daughter to find victims and now anybody could have her and….

I have to distract myself before I have a heart attack. I run into the kitchen and start making myself a cup of coffee. I click the button on the coffee machine….

It collapses. Stupid fucking HOFFMAN said he'd got a new one. I throw it across the room; it smashes on the white carpet, covering it in gunk. I groan and sink to the ground. She shouldn't be missing. She should be, out at a sleepover or…dating some cunt with no job and…getting her tummy pierced.

The front door opens and max appears.

He looks at me and sighs.

'Jigsaw?'

I glare at him. I know it's not his fault what his mom did, but he didn't tell Alex. That's wrong.

'I think I know something.' He whispers. I stare at him. He looks like he's been sobbing. A lot. I swallow my pride and talk.

'What do you know?'

He sinks down close-is to me.

'When Amanda and me lived together' he starts 'she was…. Obsessed. Obsessed with a certain person. A child, more specifically, a little girl. She hung pictures of her all over the house, at first baby pictures then school photos and then right up into teens.'

He sighs. His face looks pained as he continues

' When I was younger I asked who she was. Amanda told me she was my sister. I believed t for a while but as I got older, I began to wonder who the person truly was. I never had the guts to actually question her. Then about a year ago, Amanda started moving stuff into the spare room. Pink dressers, teddies, and a weird bed. I suddenly wasn't important anymore. I asked her who all this stuff was for. What she told me was just…Horrible'

He looks me right in the eye.

'She told me she'd found her.'

Oh my god. I grab him by the shoulders, my mind isn't holding back now, I need to know.

'WHAT HAPPENED?'

He swallows, and continues.

'after a few months she started whispering to herself. She kept, locking herself in the room and smashing stuff. She stopped talking to me, she wouldn't answer my questions so I decided to work things out for myself.'

'I didn't believe Amanda anymore, I didn't believe that this girl was my sister. So I went to city hall, and I found the folder for young. There was only me and Amanda in there. No daughter of any kind. Then I went to the hospital where she worked, and they said that she hadn't shown up in months. That was enough to convince me that something was up. So, I cornered her and made her tell me what she was, doing.'

Neither of us is breathing, just waiting for the words that will make our blood run cold.

'she-she said that the girl was right fully hers, that she should have been hers. Then she threw me out. I was so scared. I drank and did drugs till I forgot. Now I wish I hadn't.'

'why?' I whisper, but of course, I know why

'because, I think it's Alex.'

I bury my head in my hands.

The looks on their faces, as Max explains are too much to bear. I turn away and stare at a photo on the wall. It's from when she was 6. We went to this huge deserted beach and built this giant sand-castle. I look at her little face. She's sitting cross legged in front, smiling a Giant toothy grin -not so much toothy as gummy seeing As how shed lost like, 9 teeth- Me and Hoffman are standing on either side, looking cool. Kat is standing on top, of the castle. 20 and loving it. It's such a great memory, but now it's wrecked. Because I know Amanda has the exact same photo in her house, with my granddaughter doing god knows what to her.

'no' whispers Kat. 'NO!'

I rush over to her and hug her close.

'be strong. For the baby'

she straightens up and looks to Max

'where does your mom live?' he shrugs and taps his head

'Drugs effected the memory'

Amy stands up. She's angry as the turns to me. I know why. Its so obvious.

'do you remember what you put Jade away for?'

I duck my head. Of course I remember. Every day. I stay silent

'you put her away for drug abuse. Which she did to forget. So why did you put Max away for the same thing?'

I glare at her

'because I thought he would hurt Alex. Like some of the others.'

she opens her mouth to talk, but it's interrupted by the phone.

Not taking my eyes off of my friends…and Max, I answer.

'JIGSAW! IS THAT YOU?'

oh my god….

'Alex?' I whisper. Everybody looks up, I switch it to speaker phone.

'Jigsaw, you have to help me. it's Amanda-'

'I know. Max used to live there, and he knew Amanda was obsessed with a child but he didn't know it was you because of the drugs.' I'm gushing, she has to know.

There's a silence at the end.

'guys?' she whispers

'yeah?' answers Hoffman. He looks horrified. I don't blame him. Too much has happened to his little girl for him not to be.

'she's hurting me. I tried running, she used a belt and a bat. She's got a shock collar on me.'

'oh my god…' whispers Amy, tears forming in her eyes.

'then don't run.' Says Max.

'what?' growls Hoffman

'don't run Alex, or she'll keep hurting you. Gain her trust, play along.'

'why?' her voice sound tearful, and I can hear her tapping her fingers

'because. That's the only way you'll stay alive.'

Oh Max… you ignorant fool…..

'what?' she's frantic now 'what will she do?'

'look' I interrupt 'we'll find you, I promise,,, I love you'

'me too' says kat

'and me' Adds Amy

'we're all here for you' says Hoffman

we all look to Max. he takes a deep breath

' I love too much to say'

there's a really long silence.

'she's coming, I have to go.'

'Okay' whispers Max 'stay strong'

'yeah' whispers Kat

'Ok….and….guys?'

'Yeah?' I murmur

'I love you all…so much…..'

the phone goes dead.

Amy sinks to the ground and bursts into tears. Kat rushes to the bathroom and I hear her throwing up.

Max trails back to Alex's room, And Hoffman lies down on the couch, burying his face.

I look at the photo on the wall again. I walk over to it and take it out of the frame. Stroking her face, I remember that day. The ocean as it filled the moat of the castle. The taste of the burgers we had for lunch. The look on Hoffman's face as Alex disappears under the Water and reappears about a mile away. Her big toothy grin as she swims faster than any of us….

I take the photo into my room, and pull a large wooden box out from under my bed. I haven't opened it in 16 years.

The headline reads ' SHOCKING DISCOVERY, BABY SUPPLIES FOUND IN JIGSAW'S UNDERGROUND HOME'

I take it out, along with all the other newspaper clippings…. I reach the bottom, and pull out the small piece of wood that hides the secret compartment.

I look into Jade's happy face as her and Fruit shoot kiss passionately in the middle of the kitchen. Jade was so beautiful. Even 4 months pregnant and 50 feet underground.

I look at fruit shoot. He was a stand up guy. Brave, cunning, strong. He saved our life. At least they're together now.I let them both down.

'I'm sorry Jade' I whisper 'I PROMISE I'll get her back. Amanda took you, she wont take Alex too. I tuck the beach picture next to the kitchen picture. My girls. I love them both. SO MUCH. I just with I could have protected them.

I put back the wood and newspaper, and I slip the box back under my bed.

'night Alex' I whisper.

Then, just before I doze off.

'goodnight Jade'

_**oh yeah! Im back! I've realised the secret to my success! Music!**_


	29. Chapter 29

**Disclaimer: I don't own saw….. or the ring**

'I love you all…..so much'

I have to click the button before I completely break down. I lied to them, Amanda's fast asleep. I just couldn't bear to hear them worrying. I stare at the shock collar and sigh. I've tried everything to get it off, but all it did was dig into my skin. Amanda's not used it on me yet, but I don't trust her not to. Is that all the advice they can give me? Play along until they find me and HOPEFULLY get me out?

It doesn't matter what they do. I'll never get out, not with Amanda here anyway. I need to earn her trust but it's just so HUMILIATING. What I'm wearing right now for example, a _**NIGHTIE.**_ FOR God's sake, I'm 16. I slept naked for a whole month last summer when our air conditioning broke, this is just a slap in the face. The cuts on my back are smarting. I don't understand it. What made her crack? Jigsaw told me that in the time, where Jade hated Hoffman and was still recovering from the rigged trap, her and Amanda were friends. It was only when Jade and Hoffman got together that she left. I wonder what she DID. It was weeks until she finally showed up with the F.B.I, she must have been doing something in that time.

I look at the phone. I don't know where it came from. I just found it under the bed. There was no credit but I dialled reverse charge (a word to the wise, reverse charge will SAVE YOUR LIFE) to call home. Squirming in the tiny bed I remember the sound of their horrified voices. I know Kat and Amy were just holding off crying until I'd rung off. I don't know about the boys. Jigsaw will be hurting a lot, I know him. He'll be blaming himself. Hoffman won't be too thrilled with himself either, the last father-daughter thing we did was have a knife fight. Max… I just don't know. He's Amanda's son. As far as SHE'S concerned we're brother and sister, but at least us sane people know we're not. He looked so sad when I last saw him. And on the phone… what he said to me, it was so sweet. But now I don't know if I can trust him. I know it isn't his fault what his mother did, but he knew what she did. And he knew me. I told him my grandpa was jigsaw and he didn't put 2 and 2 together.

I take a big swig from the glass of water on the shelf above me (the only thing that isn't rotten) I know that it'll soon take a big toll on me, but for some reason I just don't care. Because something else is bothering me.

The voice.

The voice that was screaming through the door when Amanda was beating me.

It sounded familiar, I don't know how but it did. But it's a scary familiar, the kind you associate with something horrible. Like in THE RING where a dead horse was associated with somebody who watched that video…..

Oh….

I hate that movie.

I slip out of bed, deciding it's safer to answer the call of nature before it actually calls you. Luckily, when Amanda was forcing a toothbrush into my mouth (a horrible experience, but of course, too hungry and bleeding to struggle) I remembered the room. As I slide the lock across the door I feel a vibration go down my leg.

Oh for god's sake! This is just disgusting! as if I'm not embarrassed enough-

Oh wait.

It's the phone. A text. I pull it out of the pocket and look at who it's from.

What the…?

Max senior?

I didn't know Max had a dad. Well, at least a live one. I open the text.

'**what? You have Jade's daughter? Amanda, what have you done?'**

what the hell?

I put the phone on the floor and focus on the more important matter of present. But on my way back to my room. I can't help replying. Clearly, whoever this guy is thinks this is still Amanda's phone, so as far as they're concerned, I'm Amanda.

I text back **'I have her here, in my house, she's my rightful daughter'** I add a few mistakes to make it look like Amanda wrote it. A few moments later.

'Amanda, you know she isn't. she's Jade's. and Hoffman's' I remember what Amanda yelled at me. I text

' **I loved him MORE than that whore. she should have been mine. Jade didn't deserve her.'**

Then

' **I went to high school with her. She was good, spunky and kind. it's one thing you don't let me see our son, it's another to throw him out, _THEN _try and replace him'**

but…..Jade couldn't read…..she only went to school for a month or so…

wait.

Texting faster tan ever, I type a message to Jigsaw

'**list me everybody who went to high school with Hoff and Jade, who knew what they did' ** it takes a while, but eventually…

'**a kid called Mickey, Kat, Amy, Fruit shoot and another tall guy called Max'**

MAX…that's him

'**I think that Max guy is our Max's father.' **I forward the text conversation we just had. A few minutes later, the phone vibrates again. It's young Max this time.

'**Alex. We have to know if this guy is who we think he is. you need to trick him into coming here, that way, we have a better chance of getting you out alive.'**

Without even having to think, I sen Max senior one final text.

'**if you love him so much, go and find him. He lives where I got my new daughter. 74, hazel drive. Miami. Go ahead, find your precious little boy. But don't expect him to love you.'**

And, as promised, very quickly.

'**I'm on my way right now'**

well, I think I've figured out what Amanda was doing all this time.

**A big enough twist? Please review. Also, what did people thing of the chapter where Jade actually died? It's just nobody reviewed.**


	30. Chapter 30

**D****isclaimer: look, if I owned saw would I really be giving away valuable movie ideas? No, I don't own saw…**

My heart is pounding as I wait. This is SO DANGEROUS. The phone died last night, so I'm hiding under Amanda's bed. Waiting for her to doze off so I can steal the charger. I hope the others come soon. This is all becoming too much to bear. She hasn't hurt me since the day I almost escaped, but she's becoming more and more smothering.

Forcing weird dry, badly cooked food down my throat every night and keeping me in my dark dank room in the day. Thankfully, the horror stops there. I think I'd die if she tried to handle any…private issues.

That's another thing I'm worried about. My period is due next week. And I don't know how I'm going to manage.

A bright light floods the room and I see Amanda's scrawny legs appear at the door. Her room is not better than the rest of the house, except more photos of me. The bed sags as she climbs on, and I have to hold my breath to stop her from feeling me.

Oh god

Oh god

Oh god.

The room stinks of BO, blood and fish. The walls are covered in spiders and bugs. They've worked their way into the photos, and have eaten most of my head. I look across the room the one photo that's still in tact. The beach photo. I smile as I remember that day, me and Hoffman swimming, the giant sandcastle. I remember, Hoffman tried to offer his ice cream to me because I'd dropped my own. Then I pushed it into his face. I was only 6 years old, barely any teeth.

I fell asleep on the way home and woke up in…

The very same bed I sleep in now. I bite my cheeks to keep from sobbing again. I dare to look over the side of the bed. She's asleep, dead to the world. Carefully, I begin the search.

Wardrobe? No (although I DO find her stupid supply of little girl clothes)

Dresser? No. only newspapers.

Nightstand? YES!

I clasp it to my chest and slowly back towards the door. I gaze up at the beach picture. That was such a great day. I miss being little, and being able to do whatever I wanted. I gently stroke the picture…. The sound of the hard plastic against the glass makes me jump. I realise I was stroking with my charger hand. Sighing I slip it into my pocket…

THWACK.

Oops. No pockets.

'Sweetie? What are you doing up?'

Oh no.

Ok, I can get out of this…..just play along….

'm-mom…night….mare…' I have to stammer, one because it's authentic and 2 because I'm terrified.

'ah….poor baby. Come here' she whispers, even though the house is empty. 'the bad people can't get you now, you're mine forever.'

Wow. Touching. If only it wasn't being said by my mom's killer. She clasps me t her chest. it stinks.

'you're all mine' she murmurs

No. NO. I don't want to be hers. I've tried to hold out until they came but I CAN'T. I want out, now.

'GET OFF ME!' I push away from Amanda and thrash out at her. She shrieks as I knock over the nightstand and her little table. She tries to grab onto me but I bite her away. I don't know what's happening to me. It's like I have this big ball inside me screeching to get out, rising in my throat until it makes me thrash.

'COME HERE!' she screeches, but I'm already out the door. I know I can't run straight out because if I do she'll have time to prepare….punishment. I need to hide. I decide on the kitchen. I crawl up onto the bug-ridden worktop and hide on top of the cupboards. They're lined up side by side on the wall so I can spread out instead of scrunching up. I jump as the door flies open and Amanda appears. I stare at her in the darkness as she paces around, her yellow-white robe stained and ripped. She's a mess. A dangerous mess.

'I know you're in here' she growls 'don't make me punish you.'

I stay put. She can't force be out.

'fine' she whispers, and she pulls a remote out of her pocket.

…

..

…

The shock collar.

I gag and vomit as the volts rocket through me, I screech in pain. I fall from the cupboards and plummet to the floor. Oh Jesus. Wood and insects dig into my skin, and I feel blood trickle from my legs and face. I stare up at her face. She's so scary. Why is she doing this to me? WHY?

'_**YOU-' **_ She starts

'**MESSAGE RECEIVED' **

OH NO…. the phone! The electrocution must have charged it!

I scream as Amanda rips at my nightie. The phone (hidden under my chest) flies across the room and hits the wall. She leaves me, naked and bleeding, and fetches the phone. I don't need 3 guesses to know what she's looking at.

She wrenches me upright and starts dragging me out of he room. I wince as the rotten wood splinters into back. I can't scream anymore. I can't even scream. It's too much. It's all too hard. If I don't get out soon, I'll kill myself it's just so…..

Tears stream down my face, I don't try to stop them. I don't care anymore. And apparently, neither does Amanda.

'don't you DARE try and make me feel pity. If you can't accept that I own you, then you can rot'

OH MY GOD. I begin to kick and scream, despite my cuts. But Amanda grabs my hair and carry's on. The pictures of myself on the walls look down at me and grin. It's so ironic that Amanda hasn't got a picture of me angry, despite the fact that right now she seems to be enjoying dragging me around naked. We're close to the front door, but instead of opening it, she instead open's the other one. The one she fired a gun into.

The one with the screams.

'NO!' I scream and kick and try to bite but she holds on tight. She wrenches to door open, causing light to flood into the darkness.

Then she throws me in.

I scream as I fall down a set of hard stone steps, landing with a thump. Sobbing, I stand up. It's cold down here and I'm completely bare ass. I feel blindly for a light switch, but I can't find one. My legs and arms ache, my whole body seems to be bleeding, and…

I can't take it.

Screeching in misery I sink to the ground and sob loudly. I can't. I can't do this anymore I really can't.

'HEY!'

huh?

'Are you O.K?'

there's a voice. A boy's.

'hey, over here.'

A light floods the room and I look around in horror. The room is complete concrete, with big red stains on the walls. The floor is covered in bones, nails and other pieces of metal. And In the middle stands a tall, redheaded man. He steps forward, smiling. I shy away, humiliated. I grab an old curtain and drape it around myself.

'it's O.K' he says calmly 'I won't hurt you'

he look so kind. He's tall, but he's a sort of lanky. I could take him on any day. He's covered in freckles, quite well dressed to. I stare up into his face. I throw myself at his waist and hug him tight.

Well.

Here I am

2 weeks after meeting Max Junior

I'm sitting in a psycho's basement

Naked

Hugging a red hared stranger

Praying that my family will rescue me using a complete stranger.

Yeah.

Life's good.

'Mickey? Where are you?'

I peer around the red hared man to see a young woman. She has long black hair tied back in a red headband, she's wearing white shorts, red heels and a red camisole. Her eyes are her real perk bright green eyes. They're beautiful. Her one fault is that she's covered in scars. T's kinda gross but kinda cool at the same time.

'hey, who's the naked crybaby?' she laughs.

Pushing myself away I glare at her.

'my name is Alexus Hoffman and until that bitch kidnapped me I've never-'

I stop. The woman is staring me right in the eyes. She look horrified.

Then I notice.

Her top.

You can see through it.

Her whole stomach is one big scar, it looks like it's been slashed repeatedly and badly stitched. The only other person I've ever known with scars like that is….

No.

It can't be.

She-she died! Y-years ago…

'Jade? What's going on?'

Jade.

JADE.

JADE

JADE

JADE

JADE

I stare up into her eyes. I'm seeing my mother, for the first time ever.

**Where did all my commenters go?**


	31. Chapter 31

Disclaimer: I don't own saw

Mickey strokes my back and sighs.

'Alex, you need to get some clothes on.' I'm just standing there, staring at her. She can't be my mom. She can't. She died, Jigsaw shot her in the heart to keep her from suffering after Amanda shot her in the spine.

But there she is.

Standing tall, staring me right in the eyes.

'You're not' I whisper, turning away 'you are NOT my mom. She's dead, how DARE you pretend to be her! '

I storm over to a small white door, into a dirty white bathroom. Well, at least Amanda likes to keep her prisoners clean. I walk over to a rotten old cupboard and wrench it open. It's full of women's clothes, most likely HER'S. I glare at the door and grunt. She can't be my mom. She just can't be. I pull out a white t-shirt and a pair of jeans. Regretfully I have to borrow some underwear.

I stalk back out to see her sitting on a red armchair, staring into space. Mickey is nowhere to be seen, he's probably in one of the other rooms (in the sudden horror of when I arrived, I didn't notice all the doors) the woman pats a chair in front of her and looks at me. I sit down quietly. She sighs.

'You're my daughter'

'I'm not' I interrupt

'Yes you are!' she looks miserable, with tears forming in her eyes. I tut.

'Prove it.'

She sniffs and looks me right in the eyes.

'I joined Jigsaw when I escaped from one of his traps. At first, Hoffman despised me. But then we became...more than just acquaintances. We had, a beautiful relationship. I became pregnant-with you- but I didn't tell your father right away. I went to school with him, met Amy and Kat and' she gestures to another door 'Mickey. But then, Amy and Kat got suspicious, and made me tell Hoffman I was pregnant. Then he cheated on me with Amy, and lied. He told her that we'd broken up. But then Amanda came. With the F.B.I. she forced us underground-'

'no' I whisper

'but they found us'

'NO!' I SCREAM

'I was shot down and Jigsaw cut you out of me!'

'SHUT UP! YOU'RE A LIAR!'

'NO! I'm not, jigsaw thought he'd shot me but the gun was firing blanks, then-'

'YOU'RE A FUCKING LIAR!'

'Amanda found me and made me better, then she kept me here because she knew it would TORMENT ME THAT I COULD NEVER SEE YOU!'

I stare up at her. She looks so young. But this isn't possible, it isn't. she's sobbing, hard. I stare at her. I can't deny it, we look alike, but…..this can't be. My brain searches for an explanation, a reason that she would have for lying. A silence begins to stretch between us, I panic and voice the only accusation that I can find.

'I bet I'm not your daughter, I bet you just want me, 'cos you and that _freak_ can't have kids, and Amanda promised me to you so you can take me-' I stop as I see her face. She's shaking her head and frowning. She sits back down, tears streaming down her face. She doesn't try to stop them. Mickey steps through the door and looks at me. A smile crosses his face. But it's not a good one. The kind that would scare you if you saw it. The woman looks up at me and sees me staring. She gets up.

'Uh, Mickey, perhaps you can show Alex where she's sleeping.' He takes my hand and leads me through another door. I stare back at her, to see her mouthing something. Sorry. I don't have time to wonder what she means. We're already in my room. I look around. A huge lump rises in my throat. It's just like my room back home, horror movie posters, a laptop, way too many small rifles for ANY normal person to own. I sit on the bed. Mickey sits next to me. I move away. He moves closer. I look at him to see he's smiling again, that same, creepy smile. His hand slides onto mine.

'You know, you look very different to what I imagined.' He breathes ' I expected some little runt of a kid. Small and really stupid. Like Jade. But you're not like HER are you?'

what's he doing? I try to stand up, but he drags me back down, and lies on top of me. I kick, and scream out but he clamps his hand over my mouth. I bite him…but, he just wont let go. So I give up squirming and kick him in the balls instead. He falls off the bed… laughing.

I dart to the door, screeching.

'PLEASE! PLEASE! NO!' but it's locked. He drags me back down onto the bed, and in one rip my top's off.

'lets so how different you are'

and he gently kisses me on the neck.

_**Ok people, which twist was better? Jade alive or the Mickey rape? Also, to Jinxsaw and Sawmaniac211, I'm not giving you guys anymore clues on whats happening. (no offence to other readers, I just know them personaly)because it's not fair and it takes away the element of surprise.**_


	32. Chapter 32

**Disclaimer: oh, will this rule never end? I don't fucking own saw!**

I lie on the bed panting, my eyes squeezed shut, my clothes ripped. He left the room hours ago; I heard the woman… yelling. I don't need three guesses to know what he was doing. I want to get up, I want to walk out there and show him I don't care, but I can't. I cant face him.

Every time, that I've had sex, I've been in control. I've been able to stop it start it, if thing got too rough I could slow it down, if things felt too boring I could spice things up. Even with Max, I was completely in control.

But Mickey just…wouldn't stop. He kept going, faster and harder until I screamed in agony. And he kept on hurting me, already huge bruises are forming on my arms and legs. The scratches on my back still bleed. I lost so much blood. I actually passed out for a few minutes, but then I woke up when he smacked my head on the headboard. I can't believe this. I was so proud. Nothing could get me down, I was always right on top. But now it's just rock bottom. I'm lying here, sore and bleeding, hoping to die. I stare at the posters on the walls, the large rifles, all the things that define who I am. It's all meaningless now. Because now I don't know who I am. I wonder what the others are doing. I wonder how pregnant Kat is now. I haven't been keeping track of the days. She could be in labour for all I know. I open my eyes as I hear the doors open and the woman walks in. I don't flinch as she sits on the end of my bed. I don't care anymore. She can do what she wants.

'I'm so, so sorry.' she whispers. I don't respond. She carries on.

'I….I knew what he was going to do. But he-' she stops I sit up. I stare at her, right in the eye.

'tell me the truth' I say, swallowing the rising sob in my throat. She nods.

'Mickey…isn't a prisoner here. When I was recovering, he came to Amanda. At first it was to yell at her. He was my friend in school and we got kinda close. But when she showed me to him, he joined her. he'd always wanted action off me, but I was with your dad… not that he we were together, he thought we were brother and sister. Anyways, he knew I wasn't going near him.

At least, not by my own will. Amanda told him, that if he agreed to stay underground with me, and make sure I didn't escape, he could do what he wanted.'

I nod 'but, why is he doing it to me?'

She swallows, when she speaks next I can barely hear her.

'_He_ won't let him do it to _me_ anymore.'

What?

Who?

Somebody knocks at the door

'mom? Are you ok?'

…..

mom

mom

mom

mom…..

she has a son.

Xxx

halooo


	33. Chapter 33

Disclaimer: I don't own saw at all…ask my lawyer! Btw, the guy who's talking to jigsaw is Max's dad. A.k.a, the guy Alex was texting.

I look the man in the hallway up and down. His long black hair is tied back in a ponytail, small streaks of grey just visible. He looks back at be, fingering his goatee-style beard. He seems uncomfortable. I can't blame him. It's not every day you meet the son you abandoned.

'Max Bennett.' I sigh. He grins.

'Nobody calls me that anymore. It's Paul now.'

'Why?'

He shrugs 'grew out of it'

'Oh. Well, ready?'

He nods.

Kat flies at him as we enter the room. Followed by Amy and a few fat jokes in Hoffman's direction.

Then he turns to Max.

'Hey.' He mumbles

'Hey' mumbles Max. Paul swallows.

'I didn't want to leave you. Your mom… I thought she could take care of you. I left cos I thought she didn't love me.'

'Well, we know now she's insane.' Sighs Max. 'So now we need to know everything you know about this.'

Paul nods and sits down we all copy.

'When all you guys went missing I didn't think anything of it. I'd gone whole summers without seeing you. It was only a few months later I realised what was happening. They held an assembly about it. They told us what you did, they told us about Hoffman and Jade. Then I saw her. The woman who was leading the search. Amanda Young.'

He looks to Hoffman and sighs.

'I was stupid. You see, about 4 months before I met Jade, I'd met Amanda. I was drunk, she was weird and….'

Hoffman groans.

'I'd woken up the night after and she was gone, I didn't think anything of it till I realised she was your fake mom.' That's why I never went to you house. But in the Assembly she was really pregnant. So I went home with her and a few days later she gave birth. I was thrilled. But after a few days she changed. She wouldn't let me anywhere near her. Eventually I left I decided if she didn't want me around it was her decision. I regret to say it, but I soon forgot all about her. Mickey went missing too a while later but by then we weren't really talking much.'

he looks around the room and sighs again

'then, three months later there was an emergency news report. The search had found some kind of bunker thingy where you guys were hiding. I watched, and I hoped they were wrong, but they weren't. I Saw her get shot but after that the cameras were disabled. It killed me. I wish I could have done something. So I decided to leave Manhattan. I moved to Canada. Then I got some texts. Amanda has Jade's daughter. I hadn't even known she was pregnant. It reminded me of Max. so I've come here now to make things right. And help you guys get her back.

Amy's quickly typing on a calculator.

'O.K, 4 months before meeting Jade, one month of knowing jade, 7 months in the bunker…Amanda went into labour 4 months after we hid.'

'so what about you guys?' asks Paul

'Hoffman got Jade and Amy pregnant' I declare 'then Jade fell in love with Fruit shoot, who died to save us, me and Kat hooked up and now she's pregnant, Amy's daughter is 15 and deaf and…oh yeah, Max and Alex had sex.'

Paul winks at Max.

'so do you remember where she lived?' asks Kat nervously

Paul passes a piece of paper, an address scribbled on it.

'34 Athlon road, Manhattan!' yells Hoffman he hugs Paul, practically shattering his ribs.

'Calm down Hoffman' interrupts Kat 'we need to prepare. Plan a route and stuff'

Hoffman glares at her

'I want my daughter back. Now lets get weapons, and get her back NOW!'

Max stands.

'I agree with Hoffman.'

**I look around. 'ok.'**

**I get up and walk towards Alex's room. I go in and begin to rip the weapons from the walls. I always told her they were for decoration. But each gun, every grenade, is loaded. The knives and swords are sharpened, all ready for a time like this. I dump them on the living room floor.**

'**take your pic'**

**within a few minutes we're all fully armed. Kat has placed a hard sheet of metal under her top and strapped it on to protect mr feotus. We're ready.**

'**I'm coming too'**

**we all whirl round to see Joy standing in the middle of the room holding an ak 47.**

'**what?' exclaims Amy**

'**she's my sister, and I'm tired of being useless.'**

**Hoffman sighs.**

'**Fine'**

'**WHAT?' screams Amy**

'**she's right. If it was Jade, wouldn't you do anything to save her?'**

**Amy nods. Joy walks towards her dad and smiles.**

**We all trape out of the house into the minivan, I sit in the driver's seat with Kat next to me. All the others smush in the back. I look at kat and smile. She doesn't smile back. Slowly, she passes me a note.**

_**IT'S NOT YOURS.**_

WHAT?

She looks to Hoffman.

i-i-

without another second my foot comes down hard on the accelerator andeverybody is thrown backwards. I ignore their screams, I ignore kat's cries, I ignore everything. I want to drive away from it all, away from everything. Away from my life.

_**Let me know if this didn't make sense!**_


	34. Chapter 34

Disclaimer: I don't own saw.

Tears spill down my cheeks. Not of sadness. Joy. I believe her now. I have to. I look to my brother, who's called Harry. See, that's how I know. We're all the same. Same nose, eyes, chin. He grins at me, His flame coloured hair tousled and matted. Coming back to my senses I turn to my mom.

'why did you let him do that to me?'

she sighs and takes my hand

'I'm sorry. but if he hadn't done it now he would've done it later. And also, he won't do it again now.'

'how do you know that?'

'because of me' interrupts Harry 'he didn't count on Jade getting pregnant. He still does it when I'm not around, but now there's enough of us to stop him'

Jade smiles. I smile. Harry smiles.

'Sad'

we all turn to see Mickey standing in the doorway, pointing a gun at us. In a flash Jade steps in front of us, spreading her arms out. Mickey Laughs.

'this is just pathetic. What are you guys thinking?'

Harry steps forward

'we're thinking you're a bastard. And you can't hurt us anymore'

I step in

'3 of us. One of you'

then Jade

'you can't win.'

He laughs again

'you three are forgetting, I have the gun, I'm strongest, and I'll rape all of you if I want to!'

Harry springs at Mickey, knocking the gun from his hand. He screams as Mickey bites into his shoulder and twists his arm behind his back. I see him raise his fist, and jump. My legs wrap around his neck, and my teeth and nails dig straight into his face. He screeches, I bite harder, I taste his blood running over my tongue.

'GET OFF!' he yells, and he throws me off. I land in a heap on the floor, blood leaking from my nose. I hear a gun cock and turn to see Mickey lying in a similar position, his face invisible beneath a sheet of blood. Harry stands over him, the gun pointed at his stomach.

'I'm giving you one last chance. Stop all of this.'

Mickey smiles.

'no'

the sound is ear splitting, it echoes through my ears again and again.

But there's no silence afterwards.

As Jade helps me up and Harry washes the blood from his hands, a loud boom sounds overhead. Followed by screaming.

They're here.

'WHAT?' yells harry

they turn to me. I grin.

'the rescue has just begun.'


	35. Chapter 35

Disclaimer: I don't own saw.

Hoffman p.o.v

As the door falls to the ground I can see we were expected. Around 30 grown men are standing in the enormous hall, each one holding a different rifle. Amanda stands in their midst, clasping a machete.

The fights on.

Jigsaw turns to me.

'Right, you and Max go and find Alex, we'll stay here and deal with these guys.'

'Right' Max and me say in unison

The men cock their guns. Jigsaw picks up a grenade. He then pulls the pin and looks to us.

'Brace yourselves'

The grenade flies into the crowd. We drop to the ground and lift our metal sheets around us. Screams and banging fill the air as the metal sheets become scalding hot. Then silence. We slowly lift the sheets away to reveal blackness. The air's full of ash, and as it clears the bodies of the men becomes all too visible.

But Amanda isn't here.

'Everyone O.K?' calls Amy, rubbing her sore hands. Everyone's fine, apart from a few burns.

'Right' commands Jigsaw 'I'm pretty sure Amanda's got more lined up for us. There's no way around fighting them but if we can get Alex out quick then we can do another grenade. Max, Hoffman. Go.'

I sprint down the hallway, Max close behind me. The sound of marching sounds close by, followed by loud gunshots. We turn a corner to reveal the front hall –we came in the back- it's circular, with around 20 doors around the outside.

'She has to be in one of these' says Max and he runs to the left and begins to unbolt the first door. I copy on the right. Nothing but old paperwork and all Max finds are toys. As we open each door the hope of finding Alex gets smaller and smaller. The closest we get to finding her is a closet of her photos. Finally, we come to the last door. Slowly, I lift my hand to open it-

'Get away from there'

We spin round to see Amanda standing in the middle of the hall, her hair half charred, a large bullet wound in her leg, clasping her machete. Her bottom lip quivers. Max takes a step forward, aiming his gun precisely at her face.

'Don't come any closer' he threatens, Amanda drops her machete and looks to me.

'Why did you ignore me? Why didn't you love me like you loved her? Why didn't you pick me?' my grip tightens on the gun

'I don't love you Amanda. I never did.'

'BUT I LOVED YOU! But you never gave me closure, I went through almost 17 years, praying that you'd change your mind and come for me. You drove me to this Hoffman!'

That stung.

'You killed the woman I loved, It killed me, that I thought I'd ruined her, when really you couldn't take a little competition!'

'YOU DID KILL HER, YOU PICKED HER TO DRAG DOWN WITH YOU!'

Amanda falls to the ground, sobbing loudly, rocking herself. In that moment she becomes that little bit more human. As the tears fall down her face, I remember how she used to be. She's right, I should have told her I didn't want her. I walk over to her and kneel down.

'I'm sorry I didn't give you closure. But I'm giving it to you now. I'm sorry Amanda, but I just don't love you' slowly, a smile emerges on her lips…

Pain explodes through my stomach; I look down to see her machete sticking out of me. She laughs. It echoes through the hall, ringing in my ears. I put my gun against her head and pull, her brains spatter out across the hall. Standing I pull the sword from my stomach and look at Max.

'Open it'

Before he even pulls the handle, the door bursts open and out falls two kids.

'ALEX!' screams Max, throwing himself at her. Then he slaps such a massive kiss on her I cant help gagging. The other kid seems similarly disgusted. He smiles at me.

'Harry.'

'Hoffman'

Alex detaches her from Max and walks over to me. Tears fall down her face and she hugs me so tight, so firm that I never want to let go.

'Who are you?' demands Max, putting his hand on Alex's shoulder.

'I'm her brother, Harry' he smiles

Wait.

Brother?

I turn to the door.

Tears stream from my eyes, I hold Alex tighter. I try to talk but to words come out. Jade slowly walks towards me and puts a hand on my cheek. And so softly I can barely feel it, kisses me. I look at her, the scars on her stomach, her long, black hair, and her gorgeous eyes.

'H-how.' I stutter, trying not to let the sobs reach my voice

'She healed me, but she never let me leave. And…she let…'

'What?' I gasp; I want her to tell me, and much more, to hear her voice again.

'M-Mickey, from school. She hired him to keep me down there, and he…raped me.'

I sigh.

'Where is he?'

'Dead as of an hour ago' she shudders. I wrap my arm around her and smile.

'We're leaving.'

A huge crash sounds, and all the walls shake. A crack suddenly shoots across the ceiling and a large tile falls and shatters nearby.

'What's going on?' Screams Alex, clinging to Max

'the place is collapsing' gasps Harry 'we need to get out of here now!'

we all sprint out of the hall, down the hallway and out to where we came in. I look up in horror to see more cracks in the ceiling , large chunks of it have fallen down.

The floor is littered with the corpses of the F.B.I men, only 2 more are still fighting. Quick flick of the wrist and….fight over. Alex and Max are quickly swept up in hugs and kisses and stuff. Then they turn to Harry.

'Who are you?' asks Kat

'Alex's brother' grins Harry.

They all turn to me

'not me I'm afraid' I smile, unable to keep it all in. I step to the side, to reveal Jade.

A stunned silence, only broken by the sound of distant cracking. Paul steps forward, but before he can talk a loud scream echoes through the hall. Kat's on the floor screeching, holding her stomach.

'Kat!' yells Jade, running forward 'what's wrong?'

she looks at me, horror stricken.

'I'm in laybour.'


	36. Chapter 36

Disclaimer: I don't own saw but I do own Amy, Kat, Jade, Alex, Max, Harry and Paul. I own them! Oh…and joy.

Max's Point of view.

Kat groans as jigsaw heaves her into the back seat of he car, blood's dripping all over her clothes and her legs. Jigsaw leaps into the driver's seat and launches the car into neutral.

'GET IN THE CAR!' he screams out the window. Me, Harry and Alex leap in, eager to get away. Hoffman and Amy follow still horror stricken probably half to death. The car shoots down the street, swerving through the traffic, upsetting the already disturbed neighbours gawping at the house.

'WAIT!' screeches Amy, grabbing at Jigsaw

'What?' he yells

''we forgot JOY!' she howls.

The car skids into a u-turn and carers back down the street, the car stops and I leap out

'I'll get her, don't worry.' Of course she will, but what am I supposed to say?

As I step onto the hard stone floor It crumbles under my foot. I need to be quick.

'HELP!' Joy's in the middle of the room, crushed under a huge piece of stone. Trying to ignore the blood leaking from her legs I try and push it off.

'hello'

I look up. A tall, redheaded man's standing above me, his stomach pouring out blood. He puts his handgun to my throat.

'All I wanted' he sighs 'was her.' I glare up at him, he looks like he's had a pretty savage beating. He smirks.

'your little girlfriend did this. No wonder you left her.'

'I didn't' I spit. The roof's crumbling now, large blasts of streetlight blasting through

'but…that would mean...ooh' he grins

'WHAT?'

'we're sharing'

My stomach drops. I look to Joy. she's stopped moving now. Either dead or dying. I stare up at the man.

'then again, she did cry a little. And scream, but maybe I'm just really good. Either way, tell her to put some ointment on those cuts.

He raped her…

I look up to the ceiling. I watch the cracks reach the walls, down into the floor. Dust and rocks fall around me as the entire house caves in. bricks pummel me, throwing me around. Then pain shoots through my back. Then nothing.

**Soz for the shortness. Next one will be longer!**


	37. Chapter 37

Disclaimer: I don't own saw.

We wait.

We wait.

And wait.

I watch the walls crumble and fall, and wait some more.

but nobody comes out.

I walk over to the mess of bricks and stones, moving them out of the way just praying I can find something. Anything. I pull out a photo. The one from the beach. I throw it back into the rubble. All over the wreckage, photos of me stare up. All smiling stupidly. I look down. And my throat aches. A hand sticks out of the mess. It could be anybody's, Amanda's…Max's. But as I turn it over I can see. In the hand lies a hearing aid. Joy.

I don't know why, I don't know what good it'll do, but I begin to pull, and carry on until she's completely out.

Oh god.

Her body's crushed, her mouth open, tears still sitting on her dusty cheeks, her eyes open but not seeing. I try desperately not to think of her as dead.

she's prettier than I remember, her dead blue eyes staring into mine. I close them. She's gone. I wish I'd treated her better…I don't even know her last name.

For a moment, I forget what's happening. I'm just sitting here, in my own little bubble, taking it all in. warm, the pain subsiding. I look around, watching everybody crying, screaming…at me. But none of their words make sense, I almost smile. I think about going home, eating dinner, going to bed and cuddling up to Max-

The feeling begins to stop, though I don't know why. the cold creeping back around me, the dead weight resting on my arms, the voices coming clearer, and the pain cracking through my chest.

Amy and Hoffman's screams fill the air. Paul and Jigsaw try to pull them towards the car, all too aware of the approaching sirens. I stare at them, watching the tears stream down their faces. Their screaming stops. I look around. My eyes stop at Paul. He's shaking uncontrollably, tears staining his face. Then, as the feeling in me comes back completely, I remember _why._

_Max's dead_

My scream echoes through the night, deafening and endless. Hands drag me towards the car. I kick at them. I can't leave him, I WONT. The car door opens and I'm shoved in next to Harry. I stare up into his eyes until they blur with the tears. He wraps his arm around me and I bury my head into him. As the car speeds off Hoffman and Amy's cries turn to silent sobs. In away, even more painful. Jade wraps her arms round Paul, calming him. Kat rocks her newborn baby boy in her arms, but her sobs are obvious. Jigsaw just Keeps driving, not taking anything in. he puts the heater on. But the cold continues to rip at me.

Nobody moves as we pull up to the house. We all just sit there, not daring to move as if, if we don't everything will just stop. But it doesn't. Jigsaw and Kat get out and open the front door, leaving it open for us. Next it's Paul and Jade. Then Harry and me. Amy glares at me as we walk towards the house. I turn away but I can feel her gaze on my back.

The house's dark, nobody's dared to put on a light. Eventually Hoffman and Amy join us and flicks the switch. Hoffman and Paul are trying to stifle their bloody noses, Amy and jigsaw nursing flesh wounds, and Kat Jade and Harry all have severe burns. I'm the only one who got out unscathed. And that hurts most of all. Jigsaw hands out coffee, but none of us drink it. We just sit there, stunned. Kat puts the Baby to bed. Soon after, Kat, Jade and Paul follow. Harry rolls out a bed on Jigsaw's floor and turns in too. Me, Hoffman Amy and Jigsaw are left.

'I…I'm sorry about-' I stammer

'You should be' interrupts Amy 'it's your fault' Jigsaw's head snaps up

'That isn't true Amy'

'It is' she breathes 'you brought him here.'

'Who' I ask

'You gave him the chance.'

'Who?'

'And he's responsible for it!'

'WHO?' I yell

'MAX!' she screams back 'its his fault she died!'

'HE TRIED TO SAVE HER!'

'How do we know that? He's _Amanda's daughter. _HE COULDHAVE DONE ANYTHING. Any you brought him here'

It stings deep.

The thought of it…

I look at Hoffman, desperate to see some love in his eyes. He won't meet my gaze. Shaking uncontrollably, I stand up.

'You weren't the only one who lost her. I lost a sister today'

I run to my room and bury my head in the pillows, trying to block it all out. trying…..

To…

Stop…

….

…

..

I wake up in a sweat. My throat's dry and scratchy.

Absent mindedly I reach to my night-stand and grab a bottle. I assume it's water but after gagging and spitting it out I realise it's weed killer. Kat's watered them all down in case the baby gets hold of one. It tastes vile but I keep drinking it until the bottle runs dry. I don't know why. I listen hard. All's silent outside, the other's must be in bed. I get up and walk out into the living room. It's deserted. The stone cold coffee still lying on the table. I walk over to jigsaw's door and open it. Everyone's asleep. Even the baby. I look on the floor and watch Harry, snoring quietly, his hand reaching under the bed. Gently, I bend down to move it away. Only to hear a light thunk. I look under the bed to see a hard wooden box with a silver lock. I ease it out, making sure not to rattle it.

The lock seems pretty unbreakable, but I still try. No luck. I gently rest it on the table and search for a key. Eventually, I find it hidden in the light-shade, still warm from the heat of the bulb.

I tiptoe back to my room and place the box on the bed and unlock it.

I turn it upside down, and a whole array of things tumble out. photos, newspapers….I see a glint of silver, and watch as a small sterling blade hits the bedspread. I lift it up to inspect it. It looks like it was once part of a larger blade, but broken. Also the dried blood shows it's been used.

I clasp it hard in my hand, as I do a long trickle of blood leaks from my fist. But no pain.

I glide it across my palm again.

No pain, just blood.

I glide it across more and more, no pain at all.

A pool of blood begins to form around me, absorbing by bed, my floor, my whole body.

I lie back on the bed and laugh

But as the room starts to get darker…..I realise what I've done….

But it's too late.

**Hi!**


	38. Chapter 38

Disclaimer: I don't own saw

Jigsaw P.O.V

I sigh as I sit up, looking over at Kat I wonder what's going through her head. Does she blame Alex too? Will she gang up against her like Amy and Hoffman? I sigh and reach into my nightstand, taking out a bunch of photos. They're all of Alex; I've decided to give my box to Hoffman. A reminder that his little girl is innocent. I bend over the side and put my hand under the bed… nothing's there. I roll off the bed, reaching further, but I can't feel it. Anger boils up inside me, a huge ball of hate. That box had all my personal things in it… reminders of the people I've lost. Whoever took it will be PUNISHED. I hear jade walking around on the landing, her bracelets jangling around. She wouldn't have taken it. Not Jade-

A scream rips through the air and rings in my ears. Ripping my head open. I've heard screams, painful ones, sad ones and angry ones. But this is a different one all together. It's like somebody's reached into my guts and pulled them out. Kat wakes up, the baby starts screaming, and I hear the others running into the hall. More screams join Jades, Kat runs out too and joins them too. I slowly begin to exit the room. It's like on a record player and someone's putting their finger on it, slowing it down. I walk out into the hall, Hoffman and Jade are on the floor screaming and gagging. Amy and Paul stand at the side, stunned and Harry is throwing up in the kitchen.

Oh.

Their all standing around Alex's door. I push them all aside easily. I stare into her room. At her bed. Into her cold, dead face. The box is turned up, photos and newspapers scattered all over the place, all coated in her blood. Her entire bed painted a deep, stinging red. She's clasping a bottle of weed killer by the look of her eyes she seems to have drank it. That isn't why tears are forming in my eyes. The reason is what's in her other hand. A small, silver, blood-stained knife. My brain numbs. Slowly, I close the door. Shut her away. I walk over to the wall and unhook the phone. Everybody looks up, stunned. I dial 911 and wait, a clear, cheery voice answers.

'911 emergency how can I help you?' I clear my throat

'My granddaughter. She-she's…'

'Sir I can't help you if you don't tell me'

'She's killed herself.'

There's a long pause at the other end, and a lot of mumbling in the background.

'An ambulance is on the way'

'Thank you.'

I put the phone down and look around. They're all staring at me, horrified. Amy is the first to speak.

'We're fugitives Jigsaw! They'll put us away!'

She's bombarded by a wave of dirty looks from everybody. She hangs her head.

I sigh 'do any of us look like we did sixteen years ago? Jade's still declared as Alex Jackson, me as Arthur and Hoffman as Bob. Kat Harry and Paul aren't on the most wanted list. They'll only ask about me. And I can lie.'

They all stare and me. Harry's rocking himself on the floor. Jade rushes into the kitchen and begins to throw up. Hoffman fixes Amy a harsh stare and goes to comfort her. Paul sits down and puts his arm round Harry. I go to the door to wait for the ambulance. I'm not sorry. Amy doesn't have anybody to blame now. Only herself.

The ambulance pulls up. The driver gives me a solemn nod as I let him in. Amy and Kat shrink back as they walk past; Paul hauls Harry into the bathroom to sort him out. Only I Jade and Hoffman stay to watch. I hear them muttering.

'Messy.'

'Looks like the weed killer numbed the pain.'

'Definitely suicide'

The words echo through my head, not making sense. The driver comes out and looks at me.

'Do you want to say goodbye?'

'No.' I say sharply, turning away. It was all a wasted effort. Saving her. We lost too many people. And if Max and Joy had died, and Amy had said nothing, she wouldn't have done it. That just pushed her over the edge. The others stay silent. I walk to the door and watch as they lift her body onto the gurney. Her head sags to the side and blood pours from her mouth. They steady it and pull a large black bag over her. Kat's rocking the baby, shivering violently. Amy and Hoffman are gone; I hear a raging argument coming from their room. Paul and Harry are still in the bathroom. Only I and Jade are standing. Watching. Waiting. They wheel her out of the house and into the ambulance. Then they're speeding away. With my granddaughter. This is the second time that she's been shoved into a car and sped away.

Only this time, she's not coming back.

I walk back in. Amy's shoving her clothes into a suitcase, shaking. Hoffman stands over her. Occasionally picking up one of her clothes in disgust. She looks at me.

'I-I think its best I leave'

'No,' I cut in 'I think its best you all leave'

The others come back in, shaken they stare at me.

'Jigsaw' stammers Jade 'what are you talking about?'

'MY NAME IS JHON KRAMER.' I yell 'And I'm done with this. After the funeral, you all move out.'

'you really gonna' throw out your own kid Jigsaw?' asks Hoffman

My eyes burn a hole in his face.

'It's not mine' I smirk at his shocked face 'it's yours'

I walk out of the room, into mine, and immediately upturn Kat's dresser. Chucking it everywhere. I smile. It feels like I'm chucking them away too….


	39. Chapter 39

DISCLAIMER: I don't own saw. I never did and I never will.

Jade point of view.

My throat catches as the hearse pulls up. Hoffman puts a hand on my shoulder and sighs.

'I don't understand. Jig- John doesn't seem like type to just throw us out. He's always been so practical.'

He's really throwing us out. I look around the room. Harry and Paul are both wearing suits, identical to Hoffman. The baby, that Kat named Lewis is in a mini version. Amy, Kat and me wear black dresses. Jigsaw steps into the room. He looks at us coldly; his eyes linger on me for a long time.

'Are you all packed?' he says. I nod. Hoffman groans

'Why are you doing this John? I know you, you're not that shallow.' John ignores him, and continues with me.

'I'll have your keys then.'

I sigh and reach into my pocket. Amy begins to sob. I place them into John's wrinkly palm. As I do I remember the first time we met. How Amanda forced us together, then ripped us apart. How happy he was when Hoffman and me came together. His face, as I was dying in his arms. How close he cradled Alex. I begin to feel something. Something familiar. Just like when I wrecked his home, and when I helped them escape the F.B.I. I Know what it is now. Betrayal.

'Was it all for nothing then? All the things we did, all the times we helped each other. If I'd known what you'd be like, I'd never have helped. I'd have let that trap kill you, I'd have gone with Amanda. Alex would have grown up normal. She would have been safe!'

I sudden realisation crosses my mind.

'it's all your fault. All of it. Alex, Max, Joy it's ALL YOU FAULT. You dragged us down with you, I-if you had just left us alone, they could have LIVED! All this time, I've thought of you as some sort of hero. But you're just a cold blooded _KILLER_!'

the doorbell rings. I sigh and look around again. I glance at John one more time.

'it's a good thing we're leaving now. Before you hurt anyone else.'

I open the door, the man gives me a solemn nod.

'Are you ready. I was told a Mr Kramer was in charge.'

'he is no longer invited.' I say loudly. I hear collective gasps from the other room. The man nods again.

'Well, if the party would like to follow me to the hearse.'

We trail out of the house. Me, Hoffman and Harry are travelling in the hearse, while Kat, Amy Paul and Lewis follow in the van with the bags we're leaving for Spain right afterwards. I sit by the window, shivering despite the high temperature. Harry and Hoffman follow, both trying hard to keep calm. I turn round to see the coffin. I stroke it.

'I'm so sorry.' I whisper.

XXx

The church is packed. I can't believe it. I look around and see almost every person I've ever met.

I see school kids, teachers, my throat aches as I spot people I knew from the street, most of which look pretty successful. I scan the crowd, desperately searching for a face. Hoffman put his hand on me. He knows who I'm looking for.

'he'll still be in prison. He had a very long sentence.'

We sit right at the front, I see the large podium, the curtains. The people sit around me, slowly filling the seats, many are left standing. The music starts, and we stand. I watch Hoffman, Harry, Paul and a man I don't know, carry the coffin down the aisle. On the side is the wreath we chose. _Alexus._ They place it on the podium, and sit down. Hoffman whispers to me.

'I always thought I'd walk her down the aisle. Just never this way.'

The vicar stands. She's around 30, with long blond hair.

'today, we gather to celebrate the life, of Alexus Hoffman. Who was sadly taken from us at the fragile age of sixteen.'

I clasp Hoffman's hand.

'Alex, as she proffered to be called, was born in Manhattan, on the 2nd of May 1994. She was a happy child, who loved her family, even those who weren't related. When it came to school, she had many difficult times, including dyslexia and constant fights. But she still left with many good qualifications.'

I give a watery smile. Harry begins to sob loudly.

'Despite this, however, Alexus struggled to find a job, and was forced into prostitution soon after leaving school.'

I glare up and Hoffman

'Jigsaw's fancy moneymaking' he murmurs.

'but during this awful job, Alex found love. Max young. Who, also, sadly passed away just a day before Alex did.

Paul breaks into tears. I clasp his hand.

'on the fateful day, Alex and her family we're driving through the valley, and saw a house collapsing. It was the house that her sister, Joy Hoffman was staying at. Being heroic, Max ran into the house to try and get her out, as she was trapped. Sadly, he was too late. And the collapsing house took them both.'

Amy and Kat start crying.

'this unfortunately, pushed Alexus to take her own life.'

Finally, tears spill down my face.

I don't listen to the rest of the ceremony. The prayers, the hymns, nothing.

As we leave the church I spot someone standing in the parking lot. John stands there, shaking his head. I glare back and continue to the car.

And we pull away, shooting up the motorway.

Away from him, away from everything the did.

But in the back of my mind, I miss him.

Because he always took care of Alex.

And I'll always be grateful for that.

**Howdy!**

**The series is ending soon (sorry!) but don't forget to look at some of the following fics, such as "jigsaw meets the go compare man" and "Jigsaw in preschool"**


	40. Chapter 40

Disclaimer: I don't own saw

I watch as the trap pulls away the man's jaw. He didn't even try, the sleeping woman still lies in the floor, and the knife still lies in her hand. She doesn't know what's going on. She's just sleeping, as a pool of his blood bathes her, staining her clothes, soaking her skin. Sighing, I speak into the microphone

"Game over"

I turn away from the monitor. I don't know why I'm unhappy. I've got money, a lottery ticket found by chance. I have a house; of course one room still stinks of blood but then again, so do the rest. And I have all the time in the world to do whatever I want, so why aren't I happy?

I tried calling Jill a few times, but she's moved on now. A new boyfriend, a new family, a new life. She doesn't want to see me. I have no other family. I clench my fist as I think of the son I almost had. The son that SHE took from me. Her and Hoffman. She tried to explain a thousand times, that it was some drunken mistake, that she was sorry. But every time I see her face, all I see is him. That little baby boy grinning up at me. He thought I was his dad. Will Hoffman take care of him? Why do I care? All I know is that I'm not happy. Not anymore.

Was I ever happy? When, they we're all around me, breaking stuff, getting drunk, having sex on the furniture, was that happiness? Or did it just make me feel young?

"OH MY GOD!"

She's awake. Slowly, I put my mouth to the microphone.

'Jasmine, for over four years you husband has physically harmed you. But today he showed true sacrifice for you. He could have cut you open, to retrieve a key that would have unlocked the contraption on his face, but he would rather see death that take your life. Congratulations, you are still alive. Most people are so, ungrateful to be alive. But not you. Not anymore.'

The door unlocks, and with a final glance to her husband, she runs. I can't blame her. The beatings he gave her were very brutal. I pick up the laptop from under my desk and open it. I open my history. The link's already waiting for, me;

_**News of the world.**_

I scan hastily through it. First are all the big things, royal weddings, terror threats, and a few murder stories. Nothing, but just to be sure I look through everything, making sure to read the title of every article twice. I need to know they aren't telling my secret. I look at it all, all the boring things, festivals, contests. But nothing to do with them. Or me for that matter. Then I see another one.

_**Local wedding has biggest turnout in over 12 years**_

In the picture, I see Amy and Hoffman. Amy's dressed in a beautiful gown, showing off her perfect figure. Her hair is worn loose, a beautiful dark brown almost to her waist. Jade and Paul stand in the background, holding hands in a massive embrace. Harry stands between them holding Lewis, looking awkward. Kat smiles fondly at them all in the background, tears streaming down her face. Then I register what they're wearing. Kat and Jade, both wear deep red bridesmaid dresses. Cut just above the knees. White net is just slightly visible from underneath. Red and white. Blood and bandages. Am I the only one who see's the irony?

Behind them is a crowd with at _least _50 people. I wonder how they all know each other. I guess I never thought about Amy's family, or Kat's. Wow. They abandoned their whole family at just 14. It's hard to think of them as that young. At _14 _they we're associating with the most wanted person in all America. Their whole lives depended on me.

I close the laptop and walk over to the wall. I see trap designs, I see people's photos. I see my life's work, I see my passion. But what good is a passion, when you have nobody to share it with? That's why I was with Jill. That's why I loved to have my family around me, even if I didn't say it. But it's too late for me now. They don't want me anymore.

Maybe that's for the best. I lean against the display of weapons and reach into my pocket. A blood-stained photo, 4 people arranged around a sandcastle. Their surroundings stained red. I stroke the face of the tanned girl on the right, her hair blending with her surrounding. Kat. I loved her. But now that bridge is burnt forever….

NO.

I pull my phone out of my pocket and dial.

'Hello, American Jets' says a fruity voice

' One ticket to Mexico please'

**This chapter was proof read by sawmaniac211**


	41. Chapter 41

Disclaimer: I don't own saw

I moan. Everything around me is so _hazy._ I don't know what happened. One minute I was in a club with the others and the next I'm here…

The room slowly comes in to focus. I'm in a room, a dark concrete….

My throat catches as I realise how familiar it is. The blood stained walls, the hard metal chair, and the dark patch on the floor where I-

_No._

I put all of this behind me, I'm not that person anymore .I'm Jade Daniel's. My boyfriend is Paul Daniel's; I'm a fashion designer, I-I…

I clamp my hands over my ears, as if I'm trying to keep my head together. This room holds so many memories; it's like a window back. I have to leave, because I CAN'T let those memories back, because forgetting them was so hard.

'Hello Jade, I'd like to play a game' the picture flicks up on the screen. My head shoots up, and I stare into the deep red eyes of Billy the puppet.

'As you know, you cannot bury the past. You cannot pretend that you haven't done something, when you so clearly have. The last time, I prepared for you a journey, to help you come to terms with your criminal life. A journey that you never completed. Now, you embark on a new journey. The goal? That is for you to decide. Your lifelong instincts will tell you to do one thing, but I _implore _you to do the opposite. Let the games begin'.

I stare at the puppet's sleek white face, as if I expect it to say more. But is just stares back at me. It doesn't scare me like it used to. Its eyes don't scare me like they did my 14-year-old self. Perhaps it's because I've met the man behind them. Or maybe, I've just grown up. The puppet's mouth open's, and the shrill laugh echoes through the room. My mind flashes back. Past Spain, Past Alex, way back to before I'd even met Jigsaw. To when I was posing as a police officer, when I was still young...

We were all sitting in the auditorium; I was next to a young deputy, a tall guy who called himself Strahm. The same laugh was echoing through the room, ringing in my ears. On the large screen in front of us, a slideshow of puppets were being shown. Fat ones, thin ones, all kinds. The Sergeant at the front flicked the lights on, and shut of the projector.

'The puppet is the key. We find the puppet, we find Jigsaw, I want all of you to memorise this face…'

Odd. If I returned to the force now I'd probably get a badge of honour…

The puppet is still watching me. I move to the right, it's eyes follow me. I smirk. This is live, jigsaw is watching me at this very moment. This, is saw alive.

I walk over to the door. I remember last time I was here. The desperation, the pain as I tried to escape. I turn to face the screen.

'I'm going to get out of here John, and when I do, I'm coming for you.'

And with that, I fling the door open and walk out, into the darkness…

Xxx

Hoffman's point of view:

The steel is cold on my skin. The chains jangle as I try to pull my hands away, and as the pendulum drops lower, I see the reflection of my terrified face.

"JOHN!"

I scramble at the chains, twisting around to get out of the way of the razor sharp blade. The voice of that damn puppet shoots through my mind.

"there's nothing you're incapable of is there Hoffman? Murder, adultery, betrayal? Now your integrity will be put to the test. Will you be able to go the distance to prove yourself? We shall see…"

the pendulum drops even lower, soon it'll touch my stomach. Soon I'll be dead….

"Hoffman?"

Jade….JADE

"JADE!" oh god, please hear me Jade….please hear me…

the door bursts open, and Jade bursts through. Her eyes widen as she sees the pendulum. For a split second, she stands there, staring at the blade. Then, as it drops even lower, she runs to my head and clambers onto the table. the pendulum swings by and as it does Jade launches herself at the blade, wrapping her hands onto the pole supporting it. the pendulum continues to swing, taking Jade with it, she tightens her grip, pushing her arm hard against the blade's edge. If it swings down now it'll go straight through her, but she digs her heels in, stopping it from swinging any higher. Sweating with the strain of the heavy object, Jade lowers the blade to it's centre position over my stomach.

She clambers down from the table, panting. I let my head flop back down into the metal, gasping for air. Jade grabs hold of one of my chains binding my arm, and looks carefully at the links as she does I notice blood on her arm, as a jagged cut appears from where she stopped the blade.

"here we go" she sighs, holding up a link. She pulls the chain hard, pulling the rest of he as far as it can go. She puts the link against the pendulum blade and as she does I see a tiny gap in the metal. She pushes harder, and as the sides of the pendulum push the link open, she unhooks the chain. I wiggle my arm, I still have the cuff and half the chain, but my arm IS free. Jade repeats the act with the other chains, until she gets to my neck. She pulls hard at the open link but the can't widen it enough to get the rest of the chain off.

"Hoffman?" she asks. I reach my hands behind my neck, to where I feel hers, and pull hard at the link. Slowly, it open's and she unhooks my neck. I wiggle off the bed, making sure to avoid the dangerous blade and flop onto the floor. The chains are heavy and I'm exhausted, but Jade grabs my shirt and pulls me up.

"we need to find the others!" she yells, pulling at me. I stand up, with difficulty and walk with her, out of the room, away from the pendulum.

"and ideas where the others are?" I ask as we enter the dark hallway. As I finish, a high pitched scream fills the halls.

"NO! JOHN WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS?"

it was Kat, glancing at each other me and Jade dash off in the direction of the scream. Neither of us notice the screen in the room behind us flicker on. Or the puppet's mask lift. Or the angry face of John Kramer, whisper

'Now the games will TRULY start"


	42. Chapter 42

Disclaimer: I don't own saw

Kat's point of view:

The metal is cold against my skin, the rope cuts into my wrists and the sound of the razor blades beneath me rings in my ears. And all my mind is thinking is Lewis Lewis Lewis Lewis…

Where is he?

Who is he with?

Is he even ALIVE?

Across the room Amy tries to squirm free of her ropes, making both of our platforms wiggle uncontrollably.

We're on scales. The old timey kind, where if one side gets lighter the other side goes down and vice versa. Beneath us is a mass of razors, hacksaws, and picks all moving together ready to rip us apart. Flinching I think back to what the puppet whispered to us

"nobody is innocent. Everybody is guilty of something. For the two of you, your crime is betrayal. Sleeping with someone ELSES lover, is one of the largest. Something you are both guilty with. You seem to balance each other out perfectly, but now its time to stop. If one of you chooses to jump, and live you commit the ultimate betrayal. However are either of you decent enough to make the ultimate sacrifice and save your companion? If you cannot decide within 15 minutes, your platforms will throw you to your deaths. Let the games begin."

"KAT SNAP OUT OF IT!" screams Amy, pulling away the last of her rope. She stands, shaking the platforms unbearably. I scream as I bounce, rolling around uselessly in my fear. I begin to sob, screaming.

"NO JOHN! WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS?"

Something hits my head. Hard. I glance up to see a blue sneaker, AMYS blue sneaker.

"Kat, I swear to Santa if you don't get the fuck up I will jump and let you die I AM NOT DYING JUST BECAUSE YOU ARE A COWARD."

I move up onto my knees, shaking and sobbing. My hands have gone completely numb, flopping at the tight rope uselessly. I sob, just swaying on my knees, I squeeze my eyes shut, praying for it to end. I can't go on. I CANT. I've never been able to keep up with this kind of thing. Even when we were all happy in Spain, with no threat or fear, Lewis would just scream into the night and I wouldn't be able to stop him because I KNEW I was the reason he was crying. I was the reason John had got rid of us. I'm so useless….SO-

"KAT!"

I open my eyes to see Jade's blurry frame, slightly disfigured my a red mist. As my eyes focus I can see that she is bleeding heavily from her arm. Behind her Hoffman appears, gasping for air.

"Kat,you,need,to,jump!" he yells, clinging to the wall. Jade glares at me, furious.

"Kat we will NOT let Amy die because of something as pathetic as this, we have literally MINUTES until that timer goes out! OH FOR GOD'S SAKE!"

Jade reaches into her sock, and wields a small blade, and with a flick of her wrist it clangs onto my platform.

"USE IT!" She screams desperately, keeling over with the pain in her arm. Hoffman kneels down next to her, doing his best to stem the blood-flow.

Slowly, I press the blade against the rope and begin to cut.

Amy's point of view:

Frustrated panic. That's the only way I can describe my surroundings. Kat feebly cutting at the rope, Jade gasping in pain, and the timer ticking away our last moments. I should have expected this from Kat; over the past few months she's been sinking lower and lower. She can't even hold Lewis anymore without totally loosing it. Hoffman tries to take care of him but it doesn't WORK. He needs a stable parent, and that person just seems to be slipping further and further away.

I stare at the clock as it reaches 3 minutes. Then at Kat, she's only just reached the ropes on her legs, sobbing wildly.

"KAT!" screams Hoffman. He's managed to use the last of Jade's shirt to wrap the wound, revealing Jade's short black camisole underneath. I wince as I look at all of her scars. She gives me a weak half smile. It's weak, but reassuring.

I'm pulled from this thought as he platforms shift, looking to the left I can see Kat standing, the ropes on her legs in similar condition to Hoffman's chains. She gives me a watery smile. I smile back. She's a coward, but we love her. And maybe, we can get her some help.

"Thirty seconds!" yells Hoffman; both him and Jade are standing now, clinging to each other desperately. Quickly I turn to Kat.

" On the count of three, we both jump" I yell, she gives a shaky nod, sweat pours from her neck, her eyes are unfocused and her whole body is shaking. I'm unsure if she understands, but it's too late to go over it again.

I scream "ONE, TWO, THREE!"

As the last word leaves my lips, and I spring from the platform I turn my head. And my heart sinks. A rope, one end tied firmly around Kat's ankle, the other tightly entangled on one of the many chains supporting the platform. Such a small error, with such a devastating outcome. As I land I turn fully, we all do, praying it was just a trick of the light. But as Kat throws herself she is dragged back, screaming out for help that can't come. The timer times out before the scales can even take note of the weight change, and the platforms open. The last expression we see on Kat's face is fear, a blind, confused, agonised terror, like that of when you see someone gunned down or knifed. And we know that that look will stay with us forever. Kat falls forward, her exhausted body swinging wildly. There is blood, as the many saws and sharp objects rip her head from her body. Forgive me for my lack of emotion, but since then I have learnt it is best not to break down when remembering, all it does is make it harder to move on. We stand there in a silent horror as the scale sags down, silent spectators to the cruellest show on earth. And Kat's now lifeless corpse is fed into the floor. Blood must be spattering us, but we are numb, watching our friend disappear forever. As the last part is destroyed, the saws stop, and over head we hear those dreaded words.

"game over"

and now we come to life, Hoffman clutches his stomach, gagging and retching while Jade tries desperately to keep him up. I stare at the T.V screen. The puppet is still watching us. Later Jade will explain to me that John wanted to watch us all properly. I stare into the eyes of the poorly made toy, and for a moment I can see the face of the monster behind. I could scream, I could swear and I could kick, but instead I say, so quietly I can barely hear it myself.

"why?"

the screen dies. I know he heard. And that is enough for now. Blinking I realise I am crying, and rubbing the feeble thing from my eyes, I follow Jade and Hoffman into the hallway.

"where next?" I whisper. Jade swallows shallowly and points to the left.

"if Harry and Paul are here, it'll be that way"

and we run. Not because we're scared and not even because we want to get them out. we run, because we can't bear to be in that room any longer. We cant sit there and let our minds register the loss. We run because we hope if we run now, we might now realise it is our fault.

John's Point of view.

She singled me out, with the one question I hoped they'd never ask. I can't tell them why. The truth is so crushing, so weak compared to what I have done to them. I wanted them back because I missed them, and now I have not only taken their friend, but a lover, a mother, and a survivor. Lewis gurgles at me from the nearby crib, he doesn't know. And then it dawns on me. When they have Harry and Paul what will they do? I remember to what Jade told me in the first room. Will they do it? will they really come for me? It seems much more likely now. This game was meant to test them. But now the tables have turned, and I am the one who is trapped.


	43. Chapter 43

Disclaimer: I don't own saw.

This is just a notification, I will be ending trapped at chapter 50, with a special 51st chapter for thank-you's and such. It's been a great few years, I've been writing this since just before my 13th birthday, well I'm 15 now and although trapped has been a hell of a fic, I've lost the heart. Its been too long winded. Also looking at the stats I'm pretty sure I've lost quite a few readers which is a shame. I hope you all understand. (if anyone has made it this far) also, after writing a few one shots I will be publishing my new saw fic, it is yet to be titled but it's a hell of a read. Just ask sawmaniac211. Actually don't she'd probably get pretty pissed if people started inboxing her about it. but inbox be if you want to know about the next fic.

Yours truly, lovingly, happily, cheesily and milkilly

Im very tired

Previously known as

Deamon squirrell (or something like that I forgot)

Emochic42 (im past that phase now)


	44. Chapter 44

Disclaimer: I don't own saw.

Jade:

We run. We run from the pain that threatens to reach inside of us and tear out our hearts. I wipe the foolish baby tears from my eyes, angry with myself. This is a problem we have all realised we have since leaving here. Our bodies are disgustingly inadequate, prone to disease and weakness. That made it harder for us to live with what we were responsible for. Killing hundreds of people for their weaknesses, weather it was weakness to temptation or lust, or the inability to contain raging anger from a troubled past. Hoffman and I were responsible, letting John do this before our very eyes, and for our AMUSEMENT. We helped this man tear life away from people. The others, Amy Kat and Paul heard of this and allowed it to continue, even helped.

That is what threw Kat into her nervous breakdown. The realisation that she in turn had killed people, for no good reason. She had cradled Lewis in her arms whispering to him that she was sorry, kicking and screaming at anybody that tried to take him from her scarred arms. It was an odd feeling, seeing her self harm. She would smile blissfully as the blood leaked from her open veins, staining her clothes and dripping onto the floor. She would whisper Lewis' name over and over until she was all bled out. she was a loving mother, but her past caught up with her before she could show it. it sounds cruel, even demonic to say it made me happy. But it did. This was the only time I could be sure she was still human. Still our Kat. With her red hair and cheeky smile. When she bled I saw a flicker of the Kat I used to know. The one that I laughed with as we fought on the playground, who stormed on ahead as we descended into the dark passage below our Manhattan apartment. The one who went into labour in a collapsing building. The one, who right now, as I run through the filthy halls of a dirty warehouse, I still think of as a friend. Her last act was to save Amy. And I believe that the real Kat was inside her, telling her to jump, to follow the plans and fight the man who put her there. But as I said. Our bodies are horribly inadequate, prone to weakness. She was the old Kat at heart, but her weakness and sorrow corroded her mind, and diminished her body leaving a hollow skeleton. She had a heart, but she didn't allow herself to live. She was dead long before she died.

This is what happens when you try and play god.

God dosen't like to imitated.

Especially when you try and use him as an excuse for murder.

But we can't do anything now. We cannot undo what we have done. We have to live with it and hope that we can redeem ourselves, by doing one last act of good.

It's a very painful existence, a former apprentice of John Kramer. You try to convince yourself that you did it for the greater good. Ridding the world of evil. But all you see when you look in the mirror is a murderer, a fraud, a cold blooded killer who's only accomplishment was setting a new low for all the other killers out there. And this evil, sick person leans out of the frame, clasping their hands around your neck. And you scream and scream for help, but the persons hands clasp tighter until you cant scream anymore. And they laugh, as you lie on the floor slowly drowning in the blood of thousands of people whose lives you snatched away. I look in the mirror and I don't know who I see. But it is NOT me. She scares me. She is the person I never wanted to be. With her sad tired eyes and sick complexion. I put on my makeup to silence her, and try to live on. I take my son to school and design clothes for women who vomit more than they eat. I make love to my boyfriend and I hold him to my chest and all I can think is how wonderful it all is. But in the back of my head she sits and laughs. She says cruel harsh things about those I love, things I'd never think. I keep her silent though, smiling through my pain. But when I sleep, the person I never wanted to be wanders through my mind, spitting harsh comments. Her hands twist at my hair and arms, cutting deep groves. And I will wake up with the scratches she has engraved on me forever.

Paul says I take too long in the bathroom

Amy says I'm constantly in my head

Hoffman says I scratch my arms in my sleep

Harry says I don't need my makeup

They're all wrong.

Kat would say nothing. She would stare at me, and she would understand. She knew what it was like to be eaten up inside by the pain of what you have done. The painful knowledge that you will go to hell. Kat knew all of this without saying a word to me. Because she was going through it herself. Hoffman told her she was post-natal, and got her pills, and she took them like the good girl she was. But nothing happened. You cant erase a problem with medication or methods. You need to take the time to realise what the problem is, and find a comfort. That is what pulls you through. This is where Kat and me separate. We both struggled with the horror of what we had done. We both couldn't bear to look in the mirror. Kat, secluded herself. She took the pain of her actions out on herself. And it built up inside her until she died. I didn't. I continued to do my job as a mother and a lover, and I came out the other side of the depression as a new woman. I found comfort in my family. And yes, I still struggle to face the mirror, and the woman I have become. She follows me everywhere. But I KNOW I can survive. And if I go to hell, I will take my punishment. as I hope Kat is now, if she has gone to the underworld. Some people would say I got through because I am stronger. I dealt with this kind of pain long before her. Wrong. I survived because of luck. Had Amanda not kept me the horror would've eaten me up too. But she did, and I had time to reflect and heal. The rape was an unhealthy sideline, a mere pinprick. Sadly, when Mickey had Alex I couldn't help her. I was afraid. Too afraid to save my own daughter. Too wrapped up in keeping my own sanity I let her slip away from me. All I can do now is keep Harry as close as possible.

We're still running. Hoffman and Amy puffed out next to me. I look to them, and see the horror in their eyes, they are in pain as well. And they are looking to me for help. Their expressions are haunted. I can see just how hard they have worked to block the memories. I stop. I watch as they slow down and look back, confused by my actions. They're eager to move on, but my curiosity keeps me rooted.

"Amy. Hoffman?" I feel like I'm hearing my voice for the first time. Adult, feminine.

"What's wrong?" asks Amy, wiping Away her tears

"do you two" I whisper "ever look in the mirror, and see someone else. Not anyone you know, you see yourself but not someone you….want to be?"

Amy looks at me, breathing shakily. Slowly her knees buckle and she shuts her eyes

"she's weak. She looks at the person I have become and she's sick. She keeps crying and lashing out and she won't let me do anything. It's so _hard_. I want to move on Jade, you have to understand that. I wanted to forget like you, but I cant! Not with her there."

She sobs, clinging to the wall in tears. Our strong, brave Amy diminished. I stare at Amy for a long moment. She's serious, tears streaming down her face. I move closer and hug her tight.

"I haven't forgotten Amy. My reflection is a murderer, and she laughs at the pain. She says horrible things about us."

a petty description for such an immense pain, but I can never find the words to describe the horror.

Hoffman looks at me as the hug ends.

"My reflection is wrong. He's a violent sick man who hates me. He- he tries to make me go back to how I was. He thinks I'm weak for being with you guys. But he's wrong. I know he is. Jade, what the hell's happening?"

I step back, and look at my friends.

"it's John. What he made us do is catching up with us, like it did with Kat. But we dealt with it differently."

Again, my voice is adult. Strong.

Out of the blue, I laugh. A simple explanation for a horrible problem

"we're standing in a huge warehouse, talking about reflections. Now, I suggest we pick ourselves up, and do what we've done so far . forget the pain and confusion. We carry on, and fight until our reflections return"

we all share a nervous laugh, comforted but slightly worried by our joint problem. And we run again. And as we run, something happens. I feel taller, stronger. More powerful. I streak ahead. The pain and horror seem to blow away with the air that rushed by me. I know what I am running for now. Not John or revenge. I am running for my son, and my lover. I look down at myself and I no longer see Jade, the abandoned little girl. I see JADE a mother, a warrior, a survivor. I have finally grown up. And as Hoffman and Amy catch up with me, I know they are feeling the same. No longer are we 3 pawns on John Kramer's evil chessboard. We are 3 heroes, fighting for those we love, and the one we have lost.

I will find my son.

I will find my lover.

And me, Hoffman and Amy will fight John's pull over us.

And we will get back what is ours.

We will find salvation.

We will find love.

We will find ourselves

We will find our reflections.


End file.
